


Lighting Never Strikes Twice

by ferallahey



Category: Twilight Series - Stephenie Meyer
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Comfort, Drama, Eventual Romance, Filipino Character, Filipino Mythology - Freeform, Fluff, Heavy Themes, Horror, Mates, Multi, Platonic Soulmates, Slow Burn, Twilight Renaissance, esme is everyones mom, your mom too
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-09-29
Updated: 2020-09-23
Packaged: 2020-11-07 17:18:10
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 11
Words: 59,365
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20820956
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ferallahey/pseuds/ferallahey
Summary: After waking up from a deep slumber, Kiera is about to stumble into a world much bigger than her own.





	1. Kindred Spirits

**Author's Note:**

> AN: Before reading this, I wanted to inform you I'm taking canon into my own hands and do what I want with it. A lot will be different but I'll try to keep it similar to the story we love. Enjoy the Twilight Renaissance, babes!

_Oh when my spirit's fire burns low,_

_Leave me the darkness and the stillness,_

_I shall be tired and glad to go._

_— Sara Teasdale, from I Have Loved Hours At Sea in "The Collected Poems Of Sara Teasdale"_

Chapter One: Kindred

The woods loomed over Kiera's head, her feet digging into the earth at the mouth of the forest. A call to take off into the woods pulled at her hair, at her limbs, begging her to enter the land smothered in tall trees.

'You can not heal in the place that broke you'. A voice reminded her.

But this was a different forest, a different grove of trees and leaves, it wasn't the same shadowed and ominous place as before-

Kiera took another step forward, her hands clenched tightly at her sides. The cold soil that kissed her feet was barely felt, her body long accustomed to her slow descent into becoming weatherproof. Something untouchable.

She's been asleep for nearly seventeen years, been awake for little more than half a century. In all that time, not once has she been able to step foot into the woods. No matter how it sang to her, called her to come home, Kiera couldn't shake the visions of shadows lurking in every corner, of a man reaching for her-

Her phone rings.

It's a flip phone, silver and thin, a tiny thing called a 'Razor'. Her cousin Ramona promised her it wasn't that hard to use, that she just needed to press the one to get ahold of her. Something about speed dial and to not bother learning to text, that she herself still gets confused with the small buttons.

It's Ramona who is calling now, reminding Kiera that she has her first class in half an hour. She also reminds Kiera to wash off her feet when she gets back to the house, Ramona's Tagalog soft in her mouth with the reminder that mud is annoying to wash out.

Kiera casts one last long look at the woods before her and leaves.

School is a prison she can't avoid. The buildings are old but younger than her, the red bricks somehow made gloomy in this dreaded town. She doesn't hate Forks, but she doesn't understand how someone can live in such a grey place. Doesn't understand why Ramona would pick this area for their little family to settle down in.

They were used to the sun, the open blue skies. Ramona could no longer feel the chill, her body has become stone cold and turned to unbreakable marble over the decades, but Kiera still had her beating heart and soft skin.

Granted, with every passing day its rhythm was fading into a dull thumping sound, but until it finally stopped, she was mortal.

Kiera fiddled with her new camera, the object at once both familiar and foreign to her. Everything about it aside from the mere fact that it was a camera, was foreign. From being able to hold it in her hands now, to the speed at which photos developed- everything else was new.

Professor Teller droned on, his voice a mere buzzing that rattled around in her mind before slipping right out of her ears. He was nice enough, with his smiling face weathered and his back hunched from years of manual labor. Her professor spoke of his youth working as a construction worker, who had all but given up on life after a terrible accident.

"I thought my life was over, you know. But one day I just picked up the camera my wife and I bought for our anniversary in Hawaii and I've never put it down since."

Dully, Kiera wondered if she could find that same happiness within the little metal machine she cradled with careful fingers. She remembered the joy she used to feel from beneath the tarp when taking pictures of smiling families, yearned for the familiarity fill her and make her happy once more.

It didn't come. Not really. It was a moment of half happiness and half wistful thoughts for a past she can barely remember.

Professor Teller ended their first class, asking everyone to just try and play around with their cameras.

"Give yourself a chance with it, don't let frustration win on the first try." He called out as everyone walked out the door.

Kiera smiled at his words, fiddling with the lens. Smiling was still an oddity, the gesture more of a twist of her lips than an actual smile. Only Ramona could get one of those out of her these days, and even then they were few and far between.

But maybe she'd relearn how to do that, too.

* * *

Lunch was a pathetic affair, sitting off the side of the much too loud cafeteria. The fluorescents made her eyes burn and the scent of humans clung to her nose as she scarfed down the leftover chicken adobo Ramona had insisted she take with her.

It amused Keira to watch a creature with no need for food, slave away in the kitchen, swearing up and down that 'this recipe is the one'. If they were honest with each other, it's been so long since they've had their grandmother's adobo that every recipe seemed just like hers.

Ramona never even taste-tested the food she made, it was little more than ash on her tongue. Kiera silently mourned for the day that that happened to her, the idea of never getting to eat all of her favorite foods again helping her slow down and savor the meal before her.

When the last bite of food was finally gone, Kiera pulled herself to her feet. Kiera ghosted her way across the quiet campus, the odd little object clutched in her hands. Despite the gloom of Forks, it was beautiful and it was full of creatures that made their homes in the vivid greenery.

Snap. A finch mid-flight, it's wings obscuring most of its view, rendering it a mere blur against the somber sky.

Snap. A soulless shot of a wilting flower, one that Kiera was surprised to even see still standing.

Kiera took in a deep breath. What's with all the depressing shots? She must really be rusty.

She readied herself for another shot, scanning the grounds for an interesting subject. A girl with long chestnut hair was curled against a tree, her dead brown eyes staring at the floor while her friends chattered on about. Every once in awhile, they tried to include their silent friend, their smiles dimming more and more each time she gave a clipped answer.

The girl was hollowed out. With dark circles and too prominent cheekbones, the human was wasting away right in front of them. Whatever sadness that consumed her was the kind that killed, draining it's host till nothing was left but an empty shell. Even now, the girl was just pretending to be alive.

Kiera put her camera down, deciding against taking that girl's picture. It'd be nothing short of cruel for that awful haunted expression to be captured for all of time. Kiera couldn't offer her much, but she could at least grant her this singular kindness. Human matters were best left alone, and though Kiera felt a strange sense of belonging with this girl, she couldn't afford to risk the life she'd so carefully rebuilt.

At least that was she told herself as she walked away. Imagine her surprise when in English 101, she found herself sitting next to that lonely human.

Her shock only intensified when the slightest scent of vampire clung to her new desk mate. It was barely there, an afterthought behind the human's natural floral scent. It was a metallic tang long-forgotten amongst her mortal flesh, one that was solely her own, as if she'd always smelled this way.

The girl moved a lock of hair from her pale face, a crescent scar left silver upon her forearm. Kiera pegged it as the source of the vampiric scent, her eyebrows coming together.

If she had been bitten, she should have been a vampire by now, right? But everything about her was dull, from her haggard appearance to the way she moved. Humans were beautiful in their own way, but nothing held a candle to immortality.

The girl had finally noticed Kiera's probing stare.

"Bella." She rasped.

It took Kiera a moment to realize the girl was giving up her name. Humans were foolish that way, giving up their names at the drop of a hat. It made Kiera smile.

"I'm called Kiera." Kiera's words were careful, years of her family's teachings making it easy to dance around the truth.

And then Bella was back to being half a person. Kiera wondered what was left rattling around in that husk. Must be heartbreak, from the sheen of tears that cropped up every other minute. Hearts were fickle things, made even more feeble by the cruelty of romantic love. It'd been a blessing in disguise for Kiera to never have had the pleasure of dealing with it before.

Back when she was seventeen and naive, she'd hoped to meet someone who'd sweep her off her feet. Someone to dance away the long nights that eternity had promised her.

Now she just hoped to never end up like the poor girl sitting next to her.

Pity hit Kiera hard for the first time since she awoke. It'd taken months for her to relearn herself, but now the swelling of her throat as she watched Bella continue to blink back tears was hard to dress up as anything else but sympathy. Kiera swallowed thickly, and against her better nature, silently called out to the force of life that beat like a drum beneath her feet.

Even when blocked by cement and cheap carpet, Kiera could feel the earth pulsating under her. She bit her lip, taking another glance at Bella, who was trying to pretend to be reading an old battered copy of Wuthering Heights.

Kiera sucked in a quiet breath, and she pulled.

Up from the ground and through the soles of her feet, Kiera graciously took the offered energy, letting it swell in her core until it was getting hard to breathe.

With a careful hand, Kiera pretended to drop her pencil onto Bella's side of the long table, watching it roll into the pale girl's hand.

Bella blinked down at it in confusion, her doe-like eyes seemingly confused. After a moment, she picked up the pencil and handed it over to Kiera, the corner of her lips lifting in a mockery of a smile.

Kiera reached forward, hands trembling, watching as their fingers brushed- everything she had pulled into her, she released into Bella slowly, coaxing it to sink into Bella's skin like a warm embrace.

Like magic, color slowly replaced Bella's pallor. It clung to Bella like a newborn child in the hands of its mother, lifting her shoulders and making her smile fill up with life. Bella was a Real Girl now, almost truly human and not the reanimated corpse she seemed to be.

It was then Kiera asked to study together that night, hoping Bella would say yes. Her new friend's euphoric glow seemed to slowly wane, but her smile remained.

"We can study at my house." She suggested, with the tiniest shrug of her shoulders. "My dad might not be home though. I think he'll be with his friends."

"That's fine, we can just have some girl time then." Kiera grinned, hope fluttering in her chest.

Maybe waking up hadn't been so bad after all.

* * *

"It's like a hole has been punched in my chest. Ed-," Bella couldn't bring herself to say his name, "He was _everything_ to me."

The way that word rolled from her lips, 'everything', was like hearing everything you've ever lost all at once. The intensity of which Bella loved was an intensity Kiera had never seen before- it bordered obsessive, tiptoed around consuming.

It was terrifying and yet invigorating to bare witness to.

The girls sat in Bella's room with their textbooks resting open around them. Kiera was resting against Bella's bed while Bella herself sat at her desk. They'd long forgone their attempts at studying, it was suddenly The Bella Show, with Kiera prompting and gently prying information from her. Kiera couldn't help it, something was amiss in this love story of Bellas.

And she will admit it was simply in her nature, the desire to know.

Kiera was sure that without the energy she had transferred over earlier, Bella wouldn't have been able to share her tale. The more Bella spoke of her connection with her ex-boyfriend, the more something foreboding settled into Kiera's core.

Vampires and humans were the opposites of the spectrum, one literally depending on the other for survival. But there was no fear in Bella's voice, only love and a deep-seated agony that Kiera wished she could soothe. Vampires didn't engage with humans, much less enter relationships with them.

And with a scar like Bella's, the vampire must have loved her in return. Just how much, though? To not turn her and live with her for all of eternity, to leave her behind like this? And most red-eyed vampires would never have the strength to not drain every drop of her blood.

Unless...the rumors Ramona heard were true.

"Bella," Kiera started softly, "Did he say where he was going?"

Bella shook her head. "No. Alice never said either. All of them, they are just...gone. All seven of them."

Kiera put down the book in her hands and leaned into Bella's bed, her hand idly playing with a stray purple thread.

"They just left their house, just like that?"

"Yeah." Bella's tone was wistful now, yearning for the family who left her behind. "It truly is a beautiful house."

It was clear that Bella wasn't thinking about the house itself, but the memories she likely made in it. Now that place was tainted for her, too.

The family had been beautiful, Bella said. Beautiful and close, like an ideal family should be. Apparently, their coven name was Cullen. Kiera had smiled to herself at the name drop, much to Bella's confusion.

"Oh, it's nothing. Their name is a tad morbid, don't you think? To have the word 'cull' in your name...it's almost unfortunate."

Nevermind that it also stemmed from the holly tree, which had been born from the word holy. It was ironic and terrible all at once, a vampire coven going around with the name 'holy'.

Bella only stared at Kiera before giving a laugh. It was small and rough, probably from the time she spent without it. "You are one odd girl, you know that? I had thought I was the strange one."

"Maybe you are, and you've just finally met another weirdo." Kiera grinned.

"Yeah, maybe so."

Her father had come home late that night, but he had been so surprised and happy to see Kiera and Bella sharing a blanket on the couch, an old slasher on the screen. Kiera had been too enraptured by the gory effects to notice him standing in the doorway at first, in awe at how times truly have changed.

When she'd finally noticed him, her gaze had met with the same pair of brown eyes Bella had. He seemed on the verge of tears, but moved forward and shook Kiera's hand. He'd seemed relieved to see Bella tucked away next to her, munching on the puppy chow she'd made for them both.

Charlie had made Kiera promise to return for dinner some other night as she had made her way out to her car, his arm wrapped around Bella's small shoulders.

"Dad, you can't even cook," Bella said with fond exasperation. "It's okay Kiera, I'll make sure we actually get to eat."

Even though most dads would taking that ribbing from their kid as an offense, Charlie almost lit up at hearing Bella joke. His love for his daughter, his happiness at seeing her up and talking...Kiera could see Bella got her kind of love from her father. Strong and foolhardy, but unconditional and vast.

"I'll hold you to it! Maybe I'll even bring over some dessert." Kiera smiled and waved as she backed out of the Swan's driveway.

Now she was laying in her cousin's bed, watching Ramona look over her paperwork.

"I think they might be the gold eyed ones you told me about."

"Hmm?"

"Bella's vampire family, I think they might have had gold eyes. If they were so public and had red eyes, it'd make no sense for the Volturi to not step in and get rid of them. Red is a harder sell than gold."

Ramona tilted her head back and laughed, her long black braid slipping from her shoulder with the motion. "That's true, you'd think humans would be more suspicious of both colors, but apparently if you're beautiful enough they don't care."

"Vampires can dazzle their food, remember what Lola said. It's like a snake and a mouse, locked together with a single glance just before the snake strikes."

"Oh, Kiera, you're so dramatic." She grinned before faltering. "Do you think that Cullen kid dazzled your little friend?"

Kiera thought on it. It didn't seem like Bella was merely infatuation with the boy. It was something too intense, too alive to simply be one-sided puppy love.

"No, I think he might have loved her back. But that's what confuses me the most- if he loved her, why would he leave her like this? He didn't even turn her. I could kill her at any time, and her vampire would have to live without her for the rest of his cold little life."

"Kiera...why are you so upset over some humans love life? This doesn't have anything to do with-"

"Don't." Kiera flinched.

Ramona sighed, putting her paperwork onto her nightstand to open her arms wide. "Come here, kid."

Kiera hesitated, the memory of a meaner touch crawling over her skin like insects. But she let herself give in and eased herself into Ramona's embrace. They sat there like that, Kiera's head resting on Ramona's chest as her cousin ran her fingers through Kiera's hair.

Kiera didn't speak.

When she laid down to sleep that night, Kiera succumbed to the still waters in the back of her mind. There, She didn't have to think or feel. The weight of the day cloaked her like a second skin, sinking her down further into the black, swallowing her whole.


	2. You'll Be Just Fine

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> AN: I know there are no Cullens in this yet, but I really want to build up Kiera and Bella's friendship. I also don't want Bella to be so comatose while Edward is gone, I want her to start getting more confident in herself and have friends who aren't so 'perfect'.

_ “And here you are, living despite it all.”  _

_ -Rupi Kaur _

Chapter Two: You’ll Be Just Fine

_ Violently placed hand-shaped imprints were left among the stained glass. Her whimpers went unheard and unanswered, the residence unsettlingly void. _

_ Kiera could hardly breathe, her breaths expelling from her lungs in cold shallow puffs. The space she was trapped in was cold and dark, with only a few slivers of sun slashing through the inky darkness. The reflection of the glass felt blinding as the light bounced off the glass and into Kiera’s bloodshot eyes. _

_ “Ina!” Kiera called, slamming her palms against the glass. “Ina!” _

_ Like a coyote trapped in a set of iron jaws, Kiera’s mind went white and she thrashed around wildly. There was not enough room in her tiny horizontal prison, the glass walls closing in on her. Even the beautiful stained glass covered in a multitude of spiraling roses couldn't charm away the terror Kiera felt. Like a brutal blow to the head, the realization of where she was struck her. _

_ She was in something meant to buried six-feet under. _

_ Kiera was in a damned coffin. _

_ Again, Kiera cried for her mother, her voice growing raw. “Ina! Ina!” _

_ The hands that freed her from her jail were cold and the grip far too tight- the bones in Kiera’s arms shattered with a squeeze, an agonized howl of pain ripping its way through her throat- _

_ Kiera screamed and screamed, but the hands never let her go- _

Kiera blinked blearily out into the darkness. She had somehow tangled her blanket into a cocoon, trapping her arms to her chest like a swaddled newborn. Kiera gently kicked her way out of the comforter’s gentle hold, her eyes quickly adjusting to the lack of light.

It’d been a while since she had that dream. Kiera was admittedly superstitious by nature, a sense of quiet trepidation making it’s home in her bones. That particular dream always acted as a herald, the last call of a bird warning of danger in the area. Something was coming, something big.

Ramona never understood her strange sixth sense, claiming it wasn’t in their blueprints. But Kiera’s design was always a little off, always a little wrong. She’s full of mistakes and imperfections, oddities that twisted her shape into something foreign. But at least Ramona would believe her if she brought it up.

Ramona always believed Kiera.

Kiera forces herself to sit up, shaking hands running through her dark tangled waves. Her hand brushed against her forehead only to come away damp, and she groaned lowly to herself. Waking up covered in sweat is one of the things she’s thankful to be rid of one day.

A bitter smile worked its way onto her face as the dream replayed itself. Like a broken record, the memory always skipped as she screamed for her mother. Kiera and her mother never did have the best relationship. Their failure of a connection only shown crystal clear when Kiera woke up from her deep slumber, only to find her mother and her things gone. It wasn’t that she had given up on Kiera eventually waking up- that could have been forgiven. 

Her mother had simply stopped caring.

But Ramona had been there. Had pulled her from the coffin, her grip too tight as Kiera had flailed against her hold, too deep in her panic to recognize the touch of her older cousin. Ramona’s umber eyes had anchored her to reality once more, her gentle voice soothing the frightened animal Kiera had become.

From that day on, it was only Ramona and Kiera, the two of them against a world that would gladly leave them behind. Kiera lightly slapped her cheeks, trying to shake the somber mood that had settled over her.

“Not today.” She muttered, throwing her legs over the side of her bed.

Even though her soft blue comforter called to her, promising her safer, happier dreams, Kiera was wide awake. It’d be useless to attempt sleeping after that terrible memory.

She turned the knob of their dinky little shower to the highest temperature it would go, comforted by the steam that billowed out from the sliding glass doors. It was odd, thinking that one day she’d stop feeling hot or cold. A small desperate part of her hoped she wouldn’t stop feeling in general. Kiera ran a hand across the mirror, her own sullen face stark against the fogged up glass.

‘Ramona is right, you are dramatic.’ Kiera thought to herself, her nose wrinkling.

Her black locks clung to her skin like dark seaweed as the water ran down her back, painting the picture of a crestfallen siren. Steam pooled around her, the heat of the water leaching out the tension from her shoulders. There was no guide book, no calendar that warned her when and how things would change. No two changes were the same- every Metamorphosis was different.

Metamorphosis. Kafka would laugh in her face. As if she were a simple insect, getting ready to change into her final stage. But she would sprout no wings, would gain no bright colors.

Thinking of her inevitable future only brought Kiera grief. She loved what she was, was proud of her abilities. But damn if it didn’t threaten to give her grey hair to think about her heart just stopping one day.

A shiver crawled up Kiera’s back.

She continued to lather her hair, determined to sell the illusion of a stupid girl unaware. Slow as can be, her eyes slid to the door. Kiera could see that the door to the bathroom hung wide open, but the room was eerily devoid of life. Without turning the water off, Kiera slid the shower door open and stepped out, hastily putting on her battered robe.

Kiera hasn’t seen many horror movies in her abysmally long lifetime, but she was sure this  _ exactly _ the kind of thing she shouldn’t be doing. If she were watching herself on the screen right now, she and Ramona would be screaming to stay inside. Her only comfort was the familiar hum that clung around her.

Blue light nervously gathered at her fingertips, winking in and out of existence. Ramona swears Kiera’s power was a fluke, considering their species simply don’t have powers like hers. Nature-based abilities, sure, but having a green thumb was more likely than being a walking power box.

Making the light manifest from her arms was the best she could do, but she was sure it’d be more than enough to fight an intruder off. Away from the steamy bathroom, a sickly sweet scent lingered, trailing down the hall and to their front door. The color drained from her face, the alarm bells turning into sirens in her head.

The front door remained wide open, the dreary grey and green of Forks staring back at her. Kiera slammed it shut, knowing it’d do nothing to stop a vampire. It only gave her a false sense of security. Finding her phone, Kiera called for Ramona.

“Hey, I’m just finishing up, I’ll be home in-”

“There was something in the house.” Kiera said evenly, ignoring the way her hands shook.

“I’m on my way. Stay on the phone with me, alright?” Ramona’s voice was fast to change, her true age seeping through her commanding voice.

“I’m pretty sure it’s a bampira.” 

“I really hope the government doesn’t listen to our conversations, they’d think we are nuts.” Ramona was trying to lighten the mood, but Kiera could hear her car peeling out of the parking lot.

“What could they even do about it?” Kiera slowly made her way to her room, recoiling as the sickly scent got stronger. 

Whoever had broken into their house had spent most of their time in her room. Looking around, nothing seemed to have been touched. But Kiera’s eyes weren’t as sharp as Ramonas. She felt like a scared child waking up from a nightmare and left crying for her mother as she impatiently waited for Ramona to get back home.

“I’m almost there, just be brave a little longer.” Ramona’s voice came out uncharacteristically quiet.

Kiera had forced her way back into the bathroom, her choice of hiding places slim. Whoever had gotten in would know were she was anyways, having already found her the first time around. Vampires didn’t scare Kiera, they frightened her less and less as she aged, but anybody breaking into her house while she was showering should be on her ‘don’t engage’ list.

A car door slammed shut and Ramona blurred into the house. Kiera let her Razor close, her hands slowly ceasing in their shaking. Ramona burst into the bathroom, her hair wild as random strands tried to free themselves from her braid. 

“Whoever it was gone for now. You’re sleeping in my room until I'm sure they don’t come back.” Ramona blew at the strands hanging in her eyes, her youthful face at war with the age in her hickory gaze.

“Do you think they’ll be back?” Kiera asked.

“I don’t think so, but I’d rather deal with your snores than risk you getting kidnapped from your bed,” Ramona smirked.

“That’s possibly the worst thing you could have said to me, Mona. And I don’t snore!”

“You snore like you’re trying to wake the dead. I’m just being realistic here, it’d be easier to watch over you if we stayed close. I know you can handle a bampira, but if they have a coven...”

Ramona moved past her to turn the water off, a crease forming between her full brows.

“What about my classes?” A thought hit Kiera, dread thickening in her stomach. “What about Bella?”

“What about her?” Ramona sounded lost in thought.

“What if it’s a member of that Cullen coven?” Kiera barely caught herself from slipping across the tile, groaning at the sight of the water she tracked across the house.

“Then she’s friends with a freak and I don’t want you near them. “ Ramona muttered. Kiera followed her as Ramona went to her room, inspecting where the scent was thickest.

“Mona. Do you think we should ask her?”

Ramona stopped her searching and looked at Kiera’s pinched expression. “You want to tell this girl you’ve just met our deepest secret?”

“I’ll take that as a no…?” Kiera winced.

Ramona narrowed her eyes. “Do what you want, but you’ll be the one to kill her if she goes blabbing.”

* * *

The second Ramona met Bella, Kiera could tell her cousin was trying to keep all her mean thoughts to herself. It’s not that Ramona was particularly cruel, she was just was known for always speaking her mind. At the sight of Bella’s dull hair and her sunken in the face, Kiera could  _ feel _ the grimace Ramona made.

“Bella! How nice to meet you. I’m Ramona.” Ramona had swept in for a quick kiss to Bella’s cheek and a soft hug, totally going against Kiera’s advice to  _ not do that _ .

“Oh, nice to meet you too,” Bella said with a stiff smile. “Ramona is a nice name.” She added, giving Kiera ‘help me’ eyes from over Ramona’s shoulder. It wasn’t hard to do, considering Ramona was barely five feet tall.

“My room is just down the hall to the right, the door should be open.” Bella looked relieved about that and breezed past them both, her hand clenching the strap of her backpack tightly.

The second she was gone, Ramona murmured, “That poor girl, she looks like hell.”

“She’s been through it too,” Kiera said.

“You need to stop bringing home strays. They always break your heart.” Ramona shook her head, sighing softly.

Kiera stilled. “Don’t say that about her.”

Kiera’s mouth runs dry, and she can’t stand to look at her cousin in the eyes. The last person Ramona had called a stray, had left Kiera to rot in the woods. It felt like Ramona was cursing them both, dooming their friendship before it even had a real chance to blossom. Desperation surged through Kiera, the idea of losing a potential friend already ‘in the know’ about her world tasting like despair at the tip of her tongue.

But Bella wasn’t  _ him _ .

“I only meant-” Ramona started.

“I know what you meant.” Kiera snapped, brushing past her startled cousin. 

Ramon’s concerned gaze burned into Kiera’s back all the way to her room.

Bella was sprawled out on Kiera’s bed when she came in, an arm blocking the light from her eyes. It was a sad imitation of any Hollywood starlet, the illusion of drama ruined by how rumped Bella’s clothes were and how frizzy her hair looked. She just looked exhausted.

Kiera made sure to close her door a little harder than necessary to let Bella know she was in the room. Bella moved her arm and looked blearrily at Kiera, her brown doe eyes cradled by dark circles. 

“Hey.” Bella yawned.

“You’re still having nightmares?” Kiera’s frown deepened when Bella nodded her head.

Kiera plopped down beside Bella, their shoulders pressing together. They both laid looking at the ceiling, the occasional giggle slipping from their lips at the NSYNC poster left behind by the previous resident. Justin Timberlake's face was decorated with a halo of red kiss marks, definitely the remnants of a moonstruck teenage girl. 

She’d moved in this home with Ramona only four years ago, the place too far out to be fairly considered part of Forks. Kiera briefly wondered if she and Bella could have met sooner if she had gotten better faster. Maybe they could have braved the small world of Forks together. 

Maybe Bella wouldn’t have been left half a person.

Kiera interlaced their fingers together, her head leaning on Bella's shoulder. “What are you thinking about?”

“What I’m always thinking about.” Bella replied.

Kiera mulled over her possible responses. On one hand, she wanted to chew up and spit out the Cullens' names, angry at how they’ve treated her friend. But Bella would clam up and shut down in her current state and Kiera couldn’t afford that.

“Oh, yeah? Well, I was thinking about how Halloween is coming up. I think you’d make a mean Joan Jett.”

Bella laughed. “Joan Jett? Then who would you be?”

“Who says I’m not already in my costume?” Kiera did her best to sound scary, which must not have worked very well since Bella just snorted.

“Are you always so ...dramatic?” 

“It’s in my nature to be theatrical, Bella, don’t be rude.” 

They lay like that the rest of the afternoon, trading stories and telling tales. Bella spoke about Edward and his little family. It was almost comical, watching her omit bits and pieces of her stories. Kiera couldn’t seem to find the right time to break the news to Bella, each moment over before Kiera could gather the courage. 

‘Not tonight. The right time will come, Ramona already said the vampire won’t come back. You can wait a little longer.’

Glancing over at Bella, Kiera smiled to herself. It’s been so long since she’s had a friend. She promised she’d do right by Bella and tell her eventually. But, for now, she let herself have this.

* * *

Kiera came armed to the teeth with Halloween goodies. It was a week before Halloween, and Kiera had a bounce in her step. Forks may have been small, but it seemed holidays were something the town loved- there were trinkets everywhere. Some were more enthusiastic than others, with their lawns covered in the spookiest of decorations. 

Kiera, on the other hand, stumbled out of her car with a box of the most cliche things Bella had ever seen. The face Bella made was too precious to not be captured, and a bright flash had the human girl blinking through her laughter.

“Is this a joke? Am I being Punk’d right now?” Bella asked between a fit of giggles.

“What’s ‘Punked?’” The corner of Kiera’s mouth lifted, the cardboard box shifting in her grasp.

“It’s a T.V. show, with Asht- you know what, never mind. What are you doing with all those old lady decorations?”

“Old lady decorations?!” Kiera freed one hand to cover where a vintage black cat’s ears would be- if it still had them. “These are cute and vintage and you are just being boring!”

Both girls started cackling, Bella’s sallow face coming to life with a flush. They hurried into the Sawn residence, cackling harder when Charlie gave the box an exasperated look.

Settling into the living room, they plopped onto the floor and started digging out the decorations. Bella had made it clear that her and her dad weren’t exactly the festive types, but Kiera refused for Bella to settle for a boring Halloween. She’d begged Ramona to let her grab some of their old decorations from the crawl space, promising that it was for a good cause.

It only took one reminder of how depressed Bella had looked for Ramona to give in. After spending about a week talking Bella into letting them decorate the house, Bella had finally caved after Kiera promised she’d get to place them wherever she wanted them.

“Alice always had the perfect plan for things, so I never bothered trying to help,” Bella admitted as they strung fake webs. 

“Not everything has to be perfect. Things are allowed to be kind of messy, you know. Take Binks for example.” Kiera patted the earless black cat, giving it a small smile.

“So you know Hocus Pocus but not Punk’d?”

Kiera shrugged. “My cousin insisted that movies were more important to know than television shows. Besides, how often do you watch that show?”

“Uh, not very often.”

“Exactly.”

The girls settled into a quiet routine, the two of them moving around each other with ease. It was nice not having to talk all the time, to just simply exist together. Bella would stumble with a decoration, and Kiera would coach her through it, letting Bella figure it out for herself. 

Ramona had taught Kiera the same way when Kiera had first woken up. Kiera was confident enough with the basics of things, but it never stopped Ramona from poking fun at her when Kiera grew frustrated with technology. Kiera felt insanely old when Ramona would start talking about anything newer than her little flip phone.

Snap. Kiera’s head whipped around to see Bella holding her camera, a tiny smile on the brunette’s face. 

“You can at least warn me next time.” Kiera groaned. “Aren’t people supposed to pose for pictures?”

“You have a camera but don’t know about candids?” Bella teased.

“Candids are great for people who aren’t me.” Kiera grumbled, hip checking Bella to get around her.

“I’m just glad it’s you and not me getting their picture taken.” Bella played with the lens, dramatically zooming into Kiera’s face.

“If you like it that much, you can always take up photography.”

“I’m more of a book nerd than a photography nerd.” Bella was fast to shoot Kiera’s idea down.

“Isn’t your friend Angela both of those? You can be versatile too if you tried, Bella.” Kiera smirked then shrieked when Bella threw a plastic spider at her.

“How is Angela by the way? Have you seen her lately?”

Bella got quiet. “Not really, no.” She murmured.

Kiera hmmed. “You should see her some time, I’m sure she misses you. Oh man, that’s actually kind of a good one, I wish we had a scrapbook for these.”

Bella bit her lip, fiddling with the camera. She seemed to be debating something internally, her thin brows pinching together. Without warning, Bella shoved the camera back into Kiera’s hands and ran up the stairs.

Kiera blinked. “Bella?” She called out, popping her head around the corner.

Kiera and Charlie shared a look, the Chief sighing and getting up with his weathered armchair. Just before he could exit the living room, Bella came back down the stairs, her hands clutching something to her chest.

“We can use this one.” She said, a pained look in her eyes. “My mom had gotten it for my birthday, I was going to use it for Ed- him, but…”

Charlie looked at the girls with an uncomfortable grimace. Kiera signaled at him to go back to his seat, giving him a reassuring smile.

“Your mom will be happy to know that it’s going to good use.” Kiera wrapped an arm around Bella’s waist, giving her pale friend a squeeze. 

For the first time since they’ve met, Bella grinned.


	3. Sick Thoughts

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> AN: This chapter has some dark thoughts, and there will be darker actions throughout the fic. Stay safe y'all

Chapter Three: Sick Thoughts

Halloween had been a night full of cheesy horror movies and far too much candy, with both Kiera and Bella ending up spiraled on the living room floor. Charlie had come home to the girls fast asleep with an old black and white movie on the screen, the slasher forever stuck in a loop as the tape jammed.

He’d given them an exasperated yet fond look as he told them about how the Blockbuster lady was sure to give him shit over it. Kiera also has the faintest memory of Charlie stealing the last of the trick or treaters candy, his pockets suspiciously full when he shook them both awake.

Every moment spent with Bella was a moment of building anxiety.

Kiera’s secret weighed her down like a pair of cement shoes, the growing vastness of her lie the ocean that threatened to drown her. When things got awkward or quiet between them, the secret threatened to claw its way past Kiera’s lips. Sometimes she’d even started to tell her tale-before it would sputter and die at the tip of her tongue.

She hadn’t expected her truth to come to light like  _ this _ .

Kiera had been up on the roof of her quaint little home, pulling down the orange and purple lights Ramona had so carefully strung up. She’d let them hang there till nearly Thanksgiving, too busy between work and constantly watching over Kiera to bring them down. 

Kiera had thought it’d be nice to help out her cousin- plus she was getting sick of looking at the garish lights, not that she’d ever admit to it.

Bella’s rust-bucket of a truck came sputtering along, and the brunette stuck her head out of her window to shout Kiera’s name. It was a normal sight, nearly routine between the two girls for one to just show up at the other’s house. 

But nothing was ever simple with Bella, who was the most accident-prone human she’d ever met. Kiera had been finally wrapped up the last of the lights and was climbing down the ladder when Bella had tripped on her shoelaces and slammed into Kiera’s back, her long fingers clutching onto Kiera’s rust-colored sweater, pulling Kiera down with her as she fell.

There was no falling in slow motion- Kiera slipped from the rungs, her own hand clutching onto the sting of lights as it would save her. Her hand tried to soften her fall, the pressure between it and the hard ground smashing the light bulbs like small bugs.

“Oh, shi- Kiera! I’m so sorry, are you alright?!” Bella reached out, grabbing hold of Kiera’s shoulder.

Kiera’s eyes were first met with Bella’s, and then the treacherous loose laces of her shoes.

“Bell- how- why- Ugh, Tie your shoes next time, you almost gave me a heart attack!” 

The girls helped each other up, the lights forgotten in their concern. The scent of copper was faint but undeniably there, and Kiera cringed. 

“You’re bleeding,” Bella muttered, face going green. 

“Huh. I am.” Kiera turned her palm skywards, staring at dismay at the tiny shards of glass jutting into her hand. “You can smell it?”

“Can’t you?” Bella asked. She took a step back, fanning her face.

Kiera’s eyed Bella intently, her face becoming pinched. She’d never known a human to have such a keen sense of smell. She watched her friend for a few more moments before pulling herself together.

“I did, I just haven’t met many with, uh, sensitive noses like me.” Kiera carefully plucked the glass from her hand, observing the blood dry with a distant fascination.

She remembered Bella was watching and closed her palm, hoping she hadn’t seen her skin stitching itself back together. Bella was slowly stopping her fanning, her wide doe eyes glazed over. She seemed lost in a memory better left forgotten if the tremble of her lips was any indication.

Hesitating, Kiera opened her palm, bringing it in front of Bella’s face. Bella snapped to attention, her confused eyes on Kiera. 

“Can you check it for me?” Kiera asked cautiously. “I think I have all the glass out, but I’m not quite sure.”

“Oh. Yeah, sure, I guess.” Bella peered down at Kiera’s hand, her own coming to keep it still. “I don’t see anything, it doesn’t even look like you got cu-”

Bella stilled.

Time seemed to slow and Kiera waited for Bella to catch on. She shifted nervously, hand easily falling away from Bella’s grip. Bella stared where Kiera’s hand used to be, her own still hanging in the air.

“How?” She asked faintly.

“How…did my hand heal?” Kiera clenched her still bloodied hand, the skin as smooth as ever.

“What else could I possibly be asking about?! How the hell did your hand heal!” Bella exclaimed.

She looked like she’d seen a ghost. Her eyes filled with tears, and her mouth thinned into an unhappy line.

“Bella…” Kiera sighed. “I think we should go inside for this.”

“Fine then.”

Bella marched into the Villanueva’s tiny house, her long legs taking trembling steps. Kiera could only watch as her friend tripped over the entryway, ever the puppy with the paws she’d one day grow into. It was silent on the way to Kiera’s room.

When they entered, Bella's eyes went skywards, tensely gazing at the poster on Kiera’s ceiling.

“So.” Bella started, biting her lip. She tore her eyes from Justin Timberlake’s face to look at her friend, her doe eyes ever so tired.

“So.” Kiera sighed. “I’m not human.”

“Yeah, I guessed that.” Bella said bitterly. 

“I don’t even know how to start with this.” Kiera ran a hand through her hair, tugging at the roots.

“Anywhere. Just. Start anywhere.”

Kiera remained silent, weak-kneed and feeling nauseous. When her confidence failed her, Bella sighed.

“What are you? Let’s start there.”

“Not a vampire, if that’s what you were thinking.” She clenched and unclenched her healed hand, hoping for a surge of courage.

“So you knew about the Cullens this entire time? What, were you laughing at me, thinking about the dumb little human who was left behind?”

The force of her bitterness shocked Kiera. She’d never expected it from Bella- meek, mild-mannered Bella and hearing it made her flinch.

“Bella, never. I can’t stand them after what they’ve done to you- I’d never find that funny. And I didn’t know about the Cullens, I had my suspicions, but I wasn’t a hundred percent sure. You basically just confirmed it for me.”

Bella plopped onto Kiera’s bed, her head sinking into her tired hands. “So what other secrets are you keeping?”

Kiera came to sit beside Bella, their shoulders barely brushing.

“My kind are called Diwata. It’s hard to explain, but we’ve been compared to the Fae. It’s not as glamorous as it sounds, we are immortal and beautiful, but we aren’t much else.” Kiera swallowed. “We come from the Philippines.”

“Your cousin too then?” Bella asked slowly.

“Yeah, it’s a family thing.”

“When...when were you born?”

Kiera cringed. “I was born in eighteen forty-one, give or take.”

Bella was silent for a moment. Kiera felt like her weak heart was going to beat right out of her chest. Was this it? Would Bella not want to talk to her after this? She did lie. But it’s an understandable lie right? What if-

“It all makes sense. You  _ are _ an old lady. That’s why your decorations were so old ladyish. Is that why you don’t know what Punk’d is? Because you’re old as dirt? ”

Kiera immediately relaxed, the tension dropping from her shoulders. “You aren’t mad?”

Bella quirked her head, turning her doe-eyed gaze to Kiera, an assessing look to her. “That depends. Have you been manipulating my emotions this entire time?”

“That’s not even possible, not from one of my kind. I just take the energy from the land and give it to you. It’s like giving you a good night’s rest, at most. Nothing as drastic as that. To be honest, I didn’t even know if it’d work on you since you’re human.”

Bella pulled at a random string, twisting and twirling the powder blue thread around her finger. Her head was bowed, and she was once again lost in a place Kiera could not reach. 

“There was a vampire who could do that. Manipulate emotions, I mean. He didn’t do it often, but the last time he had, everything had gone downhill.”

Kiera opened her mouth to comment on that particular fact, but like a dam that broke, Bella’s words unleashed. She told Kiera everything of her Cullens, from the day she met her ex-boyfriend till the day he left her to rot in the woods.

With every word she spoke, unbridled rage settled into Kiera. Couldn’t they see how much Bella had relied on them? It may not have been healthy, but it was what it was. Bella had given and given throughout her life, catering to her mother, and then her father. The second someone gave her that kind of love in return, Bella latched onto them.

She had simply wanted that love returned, and that family left her like an unwanted animal who was left at the side of the road. And was it so wrong to want to be loved? To be held and cherished?

Kiera felt the gap between herself and her human companion like the great divide of a canyon. Bella was young, human.  _ Everything _ was full of feeling, the world was always ending. It clicked then, why Bella had been so broken when she continued her story.

“He didn’t confirm it when I asked if I wasn’t good enough for him. But I knew, Kiera. I’ve always known. I’m  _ this _ , and he is  _ him _ . I’m finite, while he is eternal. How he managed to love me in the first place will always be beyond me.”

“Bella, he’s not some god. He’s a fool, just with a fat wallet and a pretty face. You should never feel unworthy of love, regardless of who it comes from, and if he makes you feel that way….” 

“He made me feel special.” Bella choked on her own bitter laugh. “Like I could be something magnificent. I wanted to be like them, you know? Perfect.”

Kiera didn’t know, didn’t see the appeal of an immortal life stuck second-guessing herself. But she wrapped her arms around her friend anyways, clinging to her tightly. 

“You’re good the way you are.” Kiera said gruffly.

“I think I’m starting to see that.” Bella murmured, giving Kiera’s arm a squeeze.

* * *

It’d been easy to convince Bella to seek out her friend Jacob. Bella seemed to light up at the mention of his name these days, the gloomy clouds that hung around her chased off by the brightness of her old friend. It was a relief to Kiera, seeing Bella branch out and reclaim her lost circle of friends.

Ever so slowly, Kiera got to know Bella’s human friends. Angela was long and willowy, towering over them with her staggering height. But with kind eyes and the softest of smiles, she was easily the least intimidating. Jessica was another favorite of Kieras, her fun-loving attitude and her ambitious nature reminding her of Ramona at times.

It was Mike that made Kiera grit her teeth. He was decent enough but his sulking and pining over Bella quickly got on her nerves. Bella was clearly uncomfortable with his affections, but either he was too oblivious to it or he just didn’t care. If he didn’t watch himself, Kiera would  _ make _ him care.

“Stop glaring,” Bella muttered.

“I can’t, he’s breathing too loud.” Kiera groaned, rubbing at her temples.

Bella’s brows pinched together. “Are you alright, you seem kind of pale.” 

“I feel like roadkill,” Kiera admitted. “My head’s been hurting since last night- everything seems so much brighter and louder today.”

“Maybe you should go home...do you have a fever?” Angela asked softly, her warm golden hand coming to rest on Kiera’s forehead before she snatched it back. “You’re actually really cold!”

“That sounds like a good idea. Take notes in English for me?” Kiera did her best to give Bella a miserable look.

“Only if you don’t crash on the way home.” Bella bit her lip. “Text me when you get there?”

“Will do.” Kiera forced herself from her seat, gathering her half-eaten sack lunch and her messenger bag. She mustered one last smile for her friends before stumbling towards her car.

Getting to her car was harder than it should have been. Her breathing was heavy and her heart pounded in her ears like a warning. It took all of her strength to get herself home safely, driving herself home at a snail’s pace. 

All Kiera could do was crawl into her bed, fully clothed and bleary-eyed. It took several minutes for her thumbs to text that she was home, her fingers oddly stiff. As soon as she pressed send, Kiera faded into the black.

She awoke to Ramona gently shaking her. Kiera let her cousin lead her into their living room, the heat from the freshly lit fire doing little to soothe her stiff joints. It took three layers of their heaviest blankets and five cups of tea for the warmth to seep back into her bones.

“What’s happening to me?” Kiera asked hoarsely, knuckles turning white as she gripped her mug. 

“It’s almost time,” Ramona said. “This is how it starts- you get sick, then you get cold. It’ll be hard at first to get used to, but eventually, it’ll feel normal.”

Flashes of Kiera’s mother’s cold arms holding her close as she told her what a Metamorphosis was like flew through her mind. Little Kiera had been so fascinated, so filled with awe at the stories her mother spun. She couldn’t wait to wake up infinite, couldn’t fathom how someone could be scared of something so beautiful.

But the closer her debut came, the more afraid she grew.

Was this what it meant to be immortal? To be cold and aching? 

“...What happens after that? Will my heart really stop?” Kiera coughed.

Ramona smiled, a rueful twist to her lips. She sat beside her little cousin, holding her close and petting her long dark hair.

“It won’t even hurt. It’ll just be like going to sleep. When you wake up, there will be no more pain, no more feeling cold.” She pressed a kiss to the crown of Kiera’s head. “ Humans will think you’re cold, but that’s easy to explain away. Poor circulation, or the weather.”

“So I just have to suffer until I die?” Kiera closed her eyes, a headache around the corner.

“Isn’t that what mortal life about? Suffering?” Ramona chuckled darkly to herself.

“And you say  _ I’m _ dramatic.” Kiera mumbled.

“Oh hush, you’ll be fine. And don’t think of it as dying- you’re just changing, that’s all. Evolving.”

“Evolving, huh? Why can’t it go faster then?”

“Sadly, it’s not something you can rush through,” Ramona held Kiera closer. “But my hand is always here for you to hold.”

* * *

Kiera woke up to the sound of her phone ringing. She took a few moments to look around, the familiar scent of her cousin laced about the cozy bedroom. Ever since that vampire had broken into their house, Kiera slept in Ramona’s room just as promised, under her cousin’s constant vigilant care.

With a sigh, Kiera flipped open the phone. “Hello?” 

“Ramona said you were sick, but I didn’t think it was this bad.” Bella’s voice was full of panic, and Kiera just knew the girl was tearing her lip to shreds with those teeth of hers.

“Just what every girl wants to hear, thank you Bella.” Kiera fought back a yawn. She felt like a microwaved corpse, reheated and left to limp around. “It’ll pass, it’s just another family thing.”

Bella made a sound of recognition, the noise bringing a smile to Kiera’s face. 

“What’s up, did Charlie almost burn the house down again?”

“He’s not allowed by the stove anymore, thank God.” Bella scoffed. “No, I was just wondering if you wanted to come with me and meet Jake.”

Kiera perked up, pulling herself from her bundle of blankets to rest against Ramona’s cream-colored headboard. “Right now? I’m still feeling a bit crappy-” 

“Tomorrow,” Bella corrected. “I got him a present, I think he’ll really like it.”

Kiera tried to coax what the present was, to no avail. Bella was a stubborn girl, but the pure mirth in her voice as she spoke kept Kiera from feeling frustrated. Instead, she was nearly overcome by fondness. 

“Fine, keep your secrets.” She sighed dramatically.

Bella only chuckled, promising her she’d see what they were when they all hung out.

When Kiera and Bella arrived at the Rez, Kiera could only blink in surprise at the tall boy that ran over to greet them. He was stupidly beautiful, with long black hair he kept out of his face with a band, and the richest brown skin Kiera’s seen since she’d arrived at Forks. 

“Bella! And here I thought you only hung out with your fellow pale faces.” Jacob laughed as he picked up Bella and spun her around, her mahogany hair flying out around her.

Kiera immediately felt like she was invading. 

For a moment, Kiera wished Bella had fallen for someone like Jake. Someone bright and cheerful, someone human. 

Someone who could give her a life full of warmth and sunlight, the kind that the Arizona born girl desperately missed.

“Jacob Black.” Jake introduced himself, finally putting Bella down.

“Kiera Villanueva. It’s nice to finally meet you.”

“Likewise.” Jacob grinned. “She hasn’t shut up about you.”

Bella groaned, evading his attempt to ruffle her hair. “Don’t make it sound so pathetic, I was just talking her up to you so you’d like her!”

Jacob and Kiera only shared shit-eating grins. 

“Do you want you're present or not?” Bella taunted, her own grin blossoming. 

  
  
Jacob straightened himself up, giving her a mock-serious look. “Alright Boss, show me the goods.”

Excitedly, Bella went to the bed of her truck, grabbing hold of the tarp and throwing it back. There, nestled amongst a few random bits and bobs, sat two rusty old motorcycles.

“Bella,” Kiera said slowly, “What the hell?”

* * *

As the last of the leaves finally died and hit the ground, Kiera’s aches only worsened.

Aches, she could take. The cold, she could handle. But the more her body changed, the more her mind did too. 

Kiera was cold, but her mind felt like it was on fire.

Sick thoughts burned brightly in her mind- images of blood and gore and the cries of her fellow classmates plagued her head. She’d find herself staring at her professors, wondering what it would be like if she plucked their limbs from them like an unlucky butterfly. What it’d be like if she knocked Bella down a flight of stairs.

Would her skull split open? Would her bones break?

She craved the crunching of bones, the scent of copper drenching the air. A hunger for violence like she’d never experienced ran rampant through her, and  _ she wanted it to stop. _

Kiera didn’t feel angry. Wasn’t enraged or vengeful or craving some sort of retribution. It was like a predator was settling into her body, clenching and unclenching it’s bloodthirsty fists, demanding for her to break  _ something _ . To break  _ anything _ .

Seeing Bella’s concerned face on a regular basis helped to chase the monster away. It warmed up to her rather quickly, content to be near her dear friend, happy when Bella was happy.

_ Not this one. _

_ Not her Bella. _

‘Her’. As if Bella belonged to her. But didn’t she? Just as much as Ramona belonged to her, just as much as Jessica and Angela were starting to belong, didn’t her first and closest friend belong to her? Kiera belonged just as much to Ramona, as she did to Bella. 

This strange sense of belonging wasn’t a sense of ownership- no, it was just how Kiera’s mind was starting to process the beings around her. They were either hers, or they weren’t worth notice. 

It felt like a web was starting to spread. Long tentative stands attached her to her human friends, linking and intertwining with each other until they all were connected. The strand connecting her to Ramona was the thickest, the most secure. 

That cord was impenetrable like solid steel. 

Kiera needed to know if this was normal. If  _ she _ were normal. She was tired of losing sleep and lying to her cousin, tired of pretending she was okay when she really just wished for some damn answers. She was drying the minuscule amount of dishes they had, looking over the sink and out the window, her eyes on the treeline as Ramona spoke. 

Even now it called to her, the woods singing for her to come home.

Her cousin’s hands and face almost comical with their level of expression. The pen in her hand flew around as she gestured and ranted, jabbing it with her spirited words.

“I know what a buttress is, I was an architect once! I’m almost a thousand years old, I know what a fucking buttress is! I’m not an idiot!”

“What’s a buttress?” Kiera blurted.

Immediately, Ramona’s tone lightened. “Oh, it’s a support beam basically. Next time we pass Forks Library I’ll point them out.”

Kiera bit back her smile. Her cousin was much softer than she let on.

“Usually you make some snide comment about how pathetically small the book selection is. What’s wrong?”

Kiera’s hands stilled before she sighed. Carefully, she set both the dish and the cloth down, her eyes finally leaving the trees.

“Mona,” She breathed in, “As you changed, did you start getting some... disturbing thoughts?”

“Disturbing how?” Ramona’s eyes narrowed with barely restrained concern, her knuckles turning white around the body of her pen.

Kiera could lie to her, tell her it was just a question. Could smile and placate her, dancing around the truth just enough to wash away her cousin’s worry. 

But she was scared _ . _

Scared, because her ‘disturbing’ thoughts weren’t actually just thoughts. They were cravings. They were desires.

Kiera was actively wanting to tear through people like they were an outdated information sheet and she was the shredder. Kiera didn’t want this to be her new normal, not when she went for so long not thinking like a serial killer.

“Disturbing like I’d end up on the six o’clock news for the murder of a group of high school boys who thought it was appropriate to whistle at me when I went to the corner store for gas.”

“That’s not even that fucked up, that’s just standard.” Ramona waved it away, the tension in her shoulders dropping a fraction.

“Disturbing like I wanted to see what Bella’s insides looked like.”

Ramona frowned. “Yeah, that’s kind of disturbing.”

Kiera snorted. “You’re telling me.”

“Look kid, I’m not going to say it’s ‘normal’ for our kind because it’s not. Diwata are predatory creatures, we don’t hunt, we don’t fight. But that doesn’t say anything about you, alright?”

“I’m pretty sure it’s telling us that I need to like, go on house arrest or something.” Kiera ran a hand through her hair, frustrated to find it turning frizzy.

“Do you want to go on house arrest?” Ramona asked, quirking a brow.

“No, but what if-”

“Have you actually followed through with your thoughts? Or even tried to? What about now, do you still want to bash some heads in?”

“Well no, but-”

“Then don’t worry. You don’t have a bad bone in you Kiera, you aren’t going to actually hurt Bella. Thoughts are thoughts, even humans have those kinds of thoughts.”

“They are more like cravings though.” Kiera pointed out.

“Sometimes I still crave chicken tenders, but you don’t see me eating them.”

“That’s way different than craving for the bloodshed of a loved one.”

“If you want, I’ll do some digging. Ask around, see if someone has been through this. I’ll even look in the attic at your mom’s stuff, maybe she went through the same thing. No two Metamorphosis are the same.”

Kiera walked over to her cousin, dropping her head onto her shoulder. “I’m just scared.”

Ramona sighed. “We’ll find some answers. For now, try not to worry too much about it alright?”

Kiera bit back her urge to snarl, forcing it to come out as a huff. “Okay.”

* * *

In hopes of shaking off her terrible mood, Kiera had begged Bella to go to Port Angeles with her. She didn’t care what the did there, as long as they were doing something. It’d taken a few minutes of sulking and the promise of books and food to coax Bella from her warm bed, but eventually, the brunette relented and the two were off for a day out.

Though Port Angeles was bigger than Forks, it wasn’t overwhelmingly so. The place seemed the perfect inbetween, in Kiera’s opinion. Small enough to remain a small town, but without being as boring as Forks.

The cute shirts and other admirable trinkets they’d spotted through the windows was an oddly refreshing sight. Kiera had spent so long cooped up in her house, and even longer in her coma, Kiera hadn’t even known that this place existed.

Just how vast has the world grown while she was asleep? Yearning to explore, to traverse the seas and have the waves tell her their stories, to peak into the daily lives of the people she’s been deprived of seeing, filled Kiera. Like taking a sip of your favorite tea, the warmth spread from her belly and chest all the way down to her feet.

“One day, I’m going to see the world.” Kiera announced.

Bella nearly dropped the cup of chai tea she was holding, so startled by the sudden reappearance of Kiera’s voice. 

“Yeah?”

They were currently curled up in the corner of a cafe, new books in hand. Of course, Bella had gotten herself another romantic classic, a newer version of  _ Pride and Prejudice _ . Kiera dog eared a page of her own copy of  _ Jane Eyre _ , ignoring Bella’s cringe, and set it onto the small wooden table.

“Yeah. There’s just so many places I haven’t been to, so many things I haven’t done. I want to see Bali, visit Rome. I doubt I’ll be able to try all the foods, but the sights themselves are so worth the trip. Hopefully I’ll find a good enough job to pay for those, though.”

Bella smiled to herself. “Maybe I can show you the Grand Canyon. I think you’d like it there.”

“As long as you don’t stand too close to the rocks, I think it’d be a great time.” 

“Har har. So, is there anywhere else you wanted to go?” Bella asked.   
  


“Hmm, maybe to the candle shop we passed, the one a few shops down? I could go for a fall scented candle.” Kiera grinned, laughing at Bella’s mumbled ‘of course’.

“Sure, just let me finish up this chapter and then we can- Kiera? Kiera, what’s wrong?”

“B-bella-” Kiera choked out, her mug shattering in her grip.

Black crowded Kiera’s vision, threatening to overtake the sudden tunnel vision she was getting. 

Bella’s words came and went through Kiera’s head like she were underwater, slow and muffled and a tad unsettling. Kiera’s dark gaze was latched onto something over Bella’s shoulder, her mouth agape in a barely smothered horror.

His face was just as youthful as it’d been all those years ago. From his sharp jaw, to his curly dark hair and expressive brown eyes, Sebastian would have easily been the muse to any artists, could have easily been the man behind every beautiful song about a broken heart.

Kiera used to joke that he was the modern-day Helen- that his face could have launched a thousand ships.

But Kiera didn’t feel like joking right now.

She was immediately thrown back to that day in the woods, that day she had been left behind this very friend of hers to wither away. Phantom pain shot through her, every wound and bruise that has long since been healed coming back to taunt her.

She could feel Bella’s hands pry open her own, her friend’s soft but firm voice going in one ear and out the other. One again, copper tainted the air. It seemed Kiera was always breaking things around Bella.

Slowly, Sebastian raised his hand and waved.


	4. Divine

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> AN: Jacob won’t change from sunshine boy with a puppy crush to creepy mean Eclipse Jacob. Also, what do you think is going on with Kiera? Is it just a Kiera thing, or is it something more? And what about that hallucination of Seb? Freaky right?
> 
> Give me all your thoughts in the comments! :D

All the blood left in Kiera’s body drained from her, her face going pale. The corner of Seb’s lips twitched up to the side, revealing the glint of a jagged tooth. With the sun in his eyes, they looked a sickly yellow color, like an overripe lemon.

But like the disturbing hallucination that he was, someone stepped in front of him, and Kiera’s nightmare was gone.

“Kiera?” Bella was at her side, hand hovering over her shoulder like she was scared to touch her. “What’s wrong? What’d you see?”

Relief flooded Kiera, the feeling so profound and full, she thought she was going to overflow. Sebastián’s ghost had disappeared. Rain started to fall from the gloomy sky of Port Angeles, wiping away the memory of Sebastiån’s cruel smile. 

Napkins appeared in front of her face, and Kiera took them without thinking. She could feel the frightened tears trailing down her cheeks, could hear her own ragged breathing. Her slow heart was beating abnormally fast like she were a rabbit caught in the jaws of a fox, frightened but resigned.

“It was Sebastián.” Seeing Bella’s confusion, Kiera sighed. 

She gestured for her to sit down, ignoring the prying eyes of an elderly couple sitting off to the side. Her quiet words were like sandpaper to her tongue, and all she wanted was for a distraction. Reliving those days in the woods wasn’t how she wanted to spend her day. But here she was anyway.

“When I was sixteen, I was...arranged to be married.” Kiera ignored Bella’s shock. “It was the early nineteen-hundreds, it’s just what we did back then. Seb was my fiancee. We weren’t in love, but we were great friends, and I thought that’s all that mattered, you know? We could grow to love each other if that’s what we wanted. One night we went into the woods.”

Even now, Kiera couldn’t help the smile that came over her. Meeting Sebastián was a fond memory, regardless of how things had ended between them. Her smile quickly soured.

“I was left with gashes in my stomach and a broken arm. I hadn’t even known about my injuries, not until after I’d woken up.”

Kiera watched her friend take it all in. Bella was an open book, her face flicking through emotions faster than she flipped pages. Anger, sadness, concern. None of it sat well with Kiera. She didn’t want Bella’s pity. She didn’t want to feel like some sort of victim.

So she pushed on, hoping the unease would go away.

“That...was in the fifties. “ Kiera took a deep breath. “I’d been in some sort of slumber for seventeen years.”

“How long have you been awake?” Bella asked.

“Only for fifty-five years. Adjusting to everything has been pretty rough” Kiera admitted.

“Is that..is that normal for your kind?” Bella bit at her lip, ripping apart a napkin with trembling fingers.

“No,” Kiera said with a sharp bark of laughter, “It’s not normal at all. But I’m thankful for it, all the same.”

* * *

Bella had slammed through Kiera’s front door like she lived there, her hair frizzing against the humidity in the air.

“Good morning to you too Bella.” Kiera said, flipping a page in her book.

“Jacob- Jacob and his friends are werewolves!” She gasped out. “I punched one of them and suddenly there were these two giants wolves fighting in front of me! Jacob was one of them, Kiera, he’s a damn werewolf!”

Kiera dropped her book in shock. “Werewolves? Bella, how the hell do you manage to attract every supernatural creature in the area?!”

Ramona flashed into the room, everything about her screaming uneasy. “There’s a pack of werewolves here? What are Children of the Moon doing in Forks?”

“Is that what they are called? I hadn’t expected my childhood best friend to burst into a giant wolf. I think I need to sit down.”

Kicking out a seat for Bella, Kiera looked to her cousin for answers. “What do we do?”

“Wait a moment, did you say a giant wolf?” Ramona asked, eyes narrowed. “Werewolves don’t turn into giant wolves, they turn into some bastardized version of one. Were they standing on their hind legs and looked kind of ugly?”

Bella shook her head, arms wrapping around herself. “No, they were actually kind of beautiful. And they were literally just giant wolves. They were the size of horses!”

All the tension released from Ramona in a single breath. “We’re fine. They aren’t Children of the Moon, they are just shapeshifters. Who did you say your friend was?”

“There are more creatures out there?! What the hell is a Child of the Moon?”

“Your typical werewolf. I mean, the lore that most people know isn’t quite accurate for them either, but-”

“What did you say your friend’s name was, Bella?” Ramona snapped.

“Jacob Black,” Bella said. “He lives down at the Rez.”

Ramona nodded to herself. “Sounds about right. I heard there were possible shapeshifters down at the Reservation, I just didn’t expect wolves.”

“Is there like, some kind of reason as to why they are wolves?” Bella’s brows knitted together. “Does it depend on the tribe or something?”

Ramona waved away her question with a snort. “Nah, they are just wolf shapeshifters that also happen to be Native. There’s no ‘mythical’ story about descending from wolves or the moon turning them into humans if that’s what you are asking.”

“There’s no real rhyme or reason as to why shapeshifters are the animal they take shape of. The only thing I’ve noticed is that it’s genetic. So that’s why a certain tribe might have only one animal shape- plus wolves are pack animals, it’d make sense if there were more of them in an area.” Kiera said offhandedly, finally picking up her book and continuing from where she left off.

“If they were eagles or even foxes, they’d likely have smaller numbers,” Ramona added. “Some of the shapeshifters that take forms that big claim they exist because it’s to fight against your beloved vampires.”

Bella shot Kiera an irritated look. “You told her about the Cullens?”

Kiera’s head rolled back in exasperation. “I did tell you about our family secret when it could get us killed by some angry mob of humans. I think I’m allowed to share if there are vampires in the area with my cousin.”

“If I were you Miss Swan, I’d be very careful about what kind of friends I make.” Ramona looked Bella dead in the eyes. “Enjoy time with you're shapeshifter friend, but do be wary if that vampire of yours comes back. Vampires don’t make for good friends.”

Anger flashed in Bella’s gaze before her face became blotched with red. She looked nervous and mildly ashamed, alarming Ramona. Kiera winced, knowing what Bella was remembering. 

“What did he do to you?” Ramona demanded, striding across the room to stand in front of Bella. “Did that Cullen boy hurt you?”

“Not in the way you’re thinking,” Kiera interjected. “But...one of them sure tried.”

Ramona’s gaze softened and she knelt before Bella, taking her hand in hers. “What happened,  _ sinta _ ?”

“His brother, Jasper, he was the newest to the Cullens diet. At my birthday party, I had gotten a paper cut...Next thing I know I’m thrown into the wall and on top of a glass bowl and an entire coven of hungry vampires is looking at me like I’m the meal.”

“Your Edward was hungry for you too?” Ramona was shocked. Kiera could understand why- if he loved her, why did he think of her as a meal? She’d heard all of this before, and yet her heart broke once more for her friend.

“I was his singer.” Bella’s voice was barely above a whisper.

Even now, as she continued with her story, her face betrayed the love she held for the strange family. It was in every word, in every tear she stopped from falling. Kiera was sure that Bella still loved that family with every fiber of her being. Stilled loved her Edward with every beat of her heart.

Ramona’s face tensed. “That must have been terrifying for you. Wondering if your love was going to make a snack out of you.”

But Bella only shook her head. “I never feared for my life when it came to him. I know Edward would never hurt me. Not on purpose.”

It’d been the first time she’d spoken his name out loud like that. Kiera was getting to see her friend heal, and while it was most of the most painful things she’d ever bared witness to, she couldn’t help but revel in sharing such a moment.

The dark corner of Kiera’s thoughts called for Edward’s head on a silver plate and a giant bonfire to throw it into. The rational side of Kiera only looked away as if in agreement.

Damn, she wasn’t used to thinking so violently. 

Looking at Ramona’s hard face, Kiera could feel comforted that at least she wasn’t alone with her nasty thoughts this time.

“If he ever comes back, I’ll turn him to fertilizer,” Ramona grumbled.

Kiera tried to hide the smile on her face behind her hands, but from Bella’s glare, it didn’t work.

“I don’t even think that’s possible,” Bella said evenly, not even arguing.

“It’d be just like Ramona to find a way. I mean, have you seen that garden of hers?” Kiera giggled.

“Is that a Diwata thing too?” 

“With the exclusion of you're friend’s black thumb, yes. She may love the woods, but a gardener she is not.” 

“Is that why there is a bunch of wilting leaves in the corner of the garden?”

Kiera could only groan.

* * *

The cliffs of La Push were higher than Bella had claimed them to be. Kiera could feel herself go dizzy as they stood at the top of the tallest one, their eyes trained on the twisting water down below.

“You still want to jump?” Kiera asked, nodding her head at the sharp rocks jutting out of the grey waves.

“Maybe I shouldn’t.” Bella amended, grimacing. “You’d likely just heal even if your neck broke, wouldn’t you?”

“The gift of near-immortality,” Kiera muttered.

“On second thought, let’s just go home.”

That was fine with Kiera. They could turn back now, head over to the Forks Blockbuster and grab a few movies for a night in. Kiera was already forming ideas of what kind of snacks to snag, her mouth-watering at all the savory treats they’d get.

The hairs on the back of Kiera’s neck stood on end. 

Twigs snapped behind them, the sound of the orange and yellow leaves crunching beneath heavy feet caused a chill to crawl up Kiera’s spine. Something big was behind them- Kiera could feel the gaze of a predator trained on the back of her head.

Bella gasped.

Kiera tensed further. She didn’t doubt that he had heard what she’d just said. Why else would he show himself to her? Kiera hadn’t planned on explaining to the local shapeshifter pack that the details of her species and neither had Ramona. They didn’t want to take part in whatever treaty the Cullens and the pack had come up with.

She swallowed back her guilt. The reasoning had been purely selfish, and she felt caught stealing cookies from the cookie jar. If Kiera were being honest, she hadn’t wanted to share her existence with the pack because of their status as protectors of the land.

Kiera hadn’t wanted anyone to come demanding justice if she’d slipped and taken a life.

Cotton filled her ears as she turned around slowly, the rushing of the water roaring dully in her ears. Dark brown eyes, at once for foreign and so familiar, met her own. Standing tall above her, as tall as a Clydesdale, was the henna colored wolf form of Jacob.

Kiera didn’t even reach his shoulders, she thought with a muted horror. Jacob stood unblinking, eyes trained solely on her.

“Jake,” Kiera forced herself to look him in the eyes. “I’m not a threat.”

Jacob snorted, the cold air coming out in white puffs. He stepped closer, ears flicking about, hearing things the girls couldn’t. He was close enough to touch, his giant muzzle just a hands width away from Kiera’s face.

Kiera could feel the energy pulsating beneath his massive paws. The earth beneath him was singing, content with every step he took. But Bella’s natural reaction to a giant predator stepping forward was what broke the moment. She couldn’t help but take a step back.

It was a colossal mistake.

Bella lost her footing, her arms spiraling backward as she tried to regain purchase. Kiera reached out helplessly, her fingers catching the corner of Bella’s shirt, the fabric ripping in her grasp. Jacob surged forward, his teeth just missing Bella’s outstretched hand. She plummeted to the icy waters below, the current dragging her back under when she breached the surface for a ragged breath.

Kiera didn’t bother to look at Jacob. She pushed off the cliff’s edge in an arrow hand stretch, her mind chanting the basics of proper swimming that Ramona had taught her many years ago. The water stretched in a wild wave to meet her, and Kiera was swallowed by the ocean.

Dark hair swirled about Bella’s pale face, her skin a beacon with the minimal sunlight as it fought to pierce the waves. For a moment, the world beneath the surface was nothing but a thick blanket of darkness around her, threatening to engulf the human girl.

Kiera blinked and everything became clear. It was like she was looking through a zoomed-in lens with Bella in the center of it all. Everything behind her was muted, almost nonsensical, unimportant. Bella appeared dazed, a swirl of red floating around her head.

Blood. 

Kiera could smell it now. Past the salt, past the scent of the fish and other creatures that inhabited the ocean, there was the floral scent of Bella’s blood. Like fresh freesias with a hint of lavender- a cloying scent that pulled Kiera forward.

Her friend’s eyes shut just as she reached her, her body going limp in Kiera’s grasp. Kiera found it effortless to pull her back to the surface, her own pulse thrumming weakly in her veins. She furiously kicked her legs, an unconscious part of her remembering how much oxygen humans needed.

With a gasp she found unnecessary, Kiera finally pierced through the waves. Jacob no longer stood at the top of the cliff, his muscular legs cutting through the water to reach Kiera halfway, now sporting a pair of jean shorts.

Steam plumed off of his sepia limbs as he carried Bella. Kiera did not feel the cold, her focus only on her oddly still friend. Jacob laid her on top of the light grey sand. She already looked like a corpse.

“Come on Bella, come on!” He wasted no time in applying pressure to her chest, pumping his strong hands with desperation. 

Kiera knew the exact fear he was feeling, her dull nails biting into her wet skin as she sunk to the floor next to them, utterly helpless. Jacob and Bella’s mouth connected, his cheeks puffing as he tried to force air back into her lungs.

“Please Bella, please, please  _ please _ -” Kiera was chanting like woman undone.

Her best friend, her first friend since she woke up alone in a glass coffin- wasn’t breathing. Seeing her so still and with her lips blueberry tainted was as agony Kiera hadn’t thought she’d experience. Her cousin was immortal, she was  _ going to be _ immortal.

Death had always seemed so far away, yet here it was with Bella is its chokehold.

Humans were so damn frail. Did her Edward mean it, when he said Bella wasn’t good for him? Or had he been lying because the supernatural world wasn’t good for her?

Jacob had only scared her, and it sent her over a cliff. If Kiera ever acted on her cravings, dull as they were around Bella, she would never forgive herself. But Kiera was admittedly selfish. She’d stay in Bella’s life for as long as her friend wanted her around.

And for all her faults, Kiera wasn’t a coward. She refused to slip up and endanger Bella, but if it happened, she’d force herself to face the consequences. If she’d been born human, if she’d been given a mortal life to live out, Kiera still would have chosen to stay.

Bella was stuck with her. She wouldn’t escape Kiera, not even by death.

Kiera pushed Jacob out of the way, sending him back a few feet. Possessed with grim determination, Kiera replaced Jacob’s hands and  _ pumped _ .

“What the hell are you doing?! Move, I need to save her!” Jacob shouted, his body beginning to shake with anger.

“Shut up and let me do this! You were being too gentle.” Kiera barked.

Bella’s ribs creaked beneath the pressure in Kiera’s hands before buckling completely. Jacob tried to shove Kiera away but she snapped her teeth at his face, fear of Bella being pulled from her hands fueling her. Her mouth came away bloody, with some of his skin in her mouth.

He sat on his butt, mouth agape but giving Kiera room to work.

“Come on, Swan, wake the hell up.” Kiera took a deep breath and brought her lips to Bellas.

With one last push, Kiera surged backward to miss the water spewing from Bella’s lips. Bella’s eyes were still hazy, her lips still blue from the icy. 

But she was breathing.

Jacob knocked Kiera to the side, immediately gathering Bella up. Sitting in Bella’s truck on the way to Jacob’s alphas house, Kiera finally noticed the blood dripping from the corner of her mouth.

It tasted divine.

* * *

Kiera was surrounded.

She’d feel threatened if she weren’t so anxious about Bella. Bella, who was in another room under the warm spray of a shower. Kiera wished her senses had stayed sharp, but the moment she’d entered the property everything had dulled once more.

Tall men with thick muscles and long lush black hair stood around her. They looked at her warily, like a wild animal in a zoo, as she paced back and forth. She understood why- the taste of their brother’s warm blood was still tainting her mouth. Even as she swallowed it lingered still.

“I didn’t think you had teeth like that,” Jacob said awkwardly. “They looked like needles or something.”

“Needles?” Kiera stopped her pacing to look at Jacob. “What do you mean, needles?”

He tensed but relaxed as he found something like fear in her eyes. “Is that not normal?”

Kiera wanted to laugh. Or cry. Or both. Maybe thrash somebody while cry laughing. “Nothing’s normal with me, apparently. I’m sorry about your cheek, by the way. I didn’t know that’d happen. Didn’t know that it even could.”

“Who just bites another person’s face?” One of them actually laughed. “If that weren’t crazy, I’d be impressed.” The grin was sharp on his face, but not mean. 

“Shut up Paul!” Jacob hissed, smacking his brother’s chest.

All the emotions swirling in Kiera’s chest drained away, exhaustion settling into her bones. She walked over to the couch, ignoring the way the pack made room for her, still unsure what to make of her. She eased into the plush fabric, bringing one of the blanket’s that rested over the arms around her slumped shoulders.

“He was going to get in the way. I didn’t want to lose Bella.” Kiera buried herself deeper into the blanket, drawing her knees up to her chest and letting her forehead rest on them.

“You did what you had to do. Nobody blames you for that.” Sam said as he came into the room. His voice was full of authority, aged with wisdom the others clearly lacked. “Emily is with Bella now, she’s getting into some warm clothes. She also wrapped Bella’s ribs.”

He had a cell phone in his hand, the flip phone now closed. “The Elders said it’s alright for you to be here. They just would like to speak to you and your cousin sometime soon.”

“That’ll be fine. Thank you for not freaking out.” 

Sam smiled a bit, despite the somber mood in the room. “Your kind are always welcome here.”

Emily appeared a shaken but alive Bella in her caring grasp. Emily was Sam’s fiancee, a girl from the Makah tribe and clearly human. Kiera soundlessly opened her arms for Bella and let her sink into the blanketed warmth, wrapping them both backup and huddling close.

“Hey.” Kiera whispered.

“Hey.” Bella said back, voice hoarse.

“There’s some food if you want some.” Emily offered, her deep brown eyes shining with compassion and concern. “Maybe a muffin left over?”

Kiera gazed at Emily, too tired to speak any longer. She only shook her head and hoped Emily understood how grateful she was for her help. Emily smiled in understanding, the sight contrasting with the right side of her face which was scarred into a sad frown, tucking herself into Sam’s side.

“What were you doing out in the woods?” Kiera blurted. “Do you guys just go running around out there like that?”

The wolves chuckled, the tension leaving the room. 

“We usually run patrols, making sure no vampires are in the area. Never know what could happen if one slipped through the cracks and got too close to the Rez.” Paul said. He snorted once more, before finally settling on the floor, resting his back against the couch.

His brothers joined him, the room becoming incredibly toasty with their combined supernatural body heat. Kiera and Bella needed no fire, needed no heater. These boys were warm as sunlight and as they all shared smiles with each other, just as bright.

Somebody came through the front door, shutting it rather roughly. It was a girl, the only girl wolf Kiera had seen so far. Her long legs and towering height gave her away, but the jut of her chin warned them that she and Bella were unwelcome. Kiera only stared her down.

“Leah.” Sam warned lowly. “The girl is welcome here.”

Kiera was much more than just a girl,  _ she was a threat, _ and Leah recognized it. But whatever she found in Kiera’s eyes made her loosen her wide stance and give her a respectful nod. She plainly ignored Bella and joined the shortest wolf in the group, bumping her shoulders against his in greeting.

“Did you tell them about the leech?” Leah asked bluntly. “The redheaded one? That bitch keeps getting away, I’m getting sick of her sickly sweet scent ruining the woods for us.”

Bella snapped to attention, her wide brown eyes meeting Jacobs. “Victoria is here?!”

“What, that vampire girl from the baseball game? Why would she be here?” Kiera wanted to bang her head against the wall until all the drama that surrounded her friend went away. Maybe if she blacked out she wouldn’t have to deal with the stress of it anymore.

But because Bella was worth the stress, she pressed on. “What the hell is going on?” Kiera demanded.

“I guess she didn’t tell you about the one with dreads either, huh? Shocker.” Leah sneered.

“Laurent found me in the meadow Edward and I used to hang out in.” Bella admitted sheepishly. “He’d been with the Denali coven, trying to join the vegetarian lifestyle, but when I saw him his eyes were just as bloody as they’d always been.”

“He tried to make a snack out of here and we ripped him to shreds.” Paul shrugged and the look on his face beyond smug. “So don’t worry about him.”

Kiera looked at him appreciatively. He was definitely one of the most handsome of the boys; all big muscles and sharp jawed, his inky black hair in a top-knot. Even his smug face was attractive, if not irritating. 

She stole a glance at Emily, wondering what would it be like if she joined the wolf girls too.

“Victoria has been looking for me this entire time.” Bella continued, rolling her eyes at Paul. “She thinks if she kills me, it’ll hurt Edward. An eye for an eye. But she’s wrong. Edward’s long gone and he’s not coming back.”

“Sounds like she needs a hobby.” Kiera said tiredly, rubbing her forehead. 

“Maybe she should take up crochet.” Paul cackles, his brother’s joining in.

“She’s obviously not going to get to you. There’s a pack of wolves on her trail, and my cousin and I won’t let anyone hurt you. But,” Kiera hesitated, cringing. “I don’t think you should come over anymore-”

“What, why?” Bella looked wounded. Like Kiera was telling her they could never see each other again, or that she was leaving town forever. Kiera’s cringe deepened.

“There may have been a vampire break-in at my place a few months back. They didn’t touch anything, but they kind of watched me shower. “

“That’s sick.” Leah snarled. “You should have lit them up like a bonfire.”

“More like a Christmas tree.” Kiera avoided Bella’s eyes, freeing one of her hands from the blanket and willing it to light up. “I’m not good with it yet, but it hasn’t failed me yet.”

Blue streaks of neon light shot around her brown hand, zig-zagging with wild energy. Paul scrambled from the couch, his lips curling back in an uneasy snarl.

Shaking her hand like she was shaking off numbness, Kiera’s lightning disappeared. The room was silent before bursting full of excited voices. Even Leah’s sour expression had melted away to something akin to impressed. 

“I think she’ll be just fine around you.” Sam smiled.

* * *

The ride back to Bella’s house was silent. Bella was curled against Jacob’s side, soaking in all the heat she could, shivering despite the warm shower she’d taken.

Jacob didn’t seem to mind it one bit. In fact, he was all too happy to wrap a muscled arm around Bella’s thin shoulders, his lips pulling into an easy grin. His puppy crush was clear for everyone to see, including Bella. Kiera wasn’t sure how her friend felt towards the wolf boy, but it was cleared that in some way she deeply loved him. Maybe it wasn’t in the way Jacob wanted, but she loved him none the less.

When they’d pulled into Bella’s driveway, they’d finally broken their silence to speak about more plans on what to do about Victoria. Jacob jumped out of the truck, holding the old creaky door open for Bella. In an instant, he was scrambling back into the truck and restarting it, shaking and cursing.

“What’s going on?!” Bella pulled on his arm, alarmed. “Jacob, go back to my house!”

“There’s a bloodsucker in there! We have to get back to La Push. It’s the safest bet for you, Bella.”

The car turned around, the headlights flashing over an oddly nice Mercedes amongst the rusted cars of Forks. Bella gasped, her body moving in a frenzy, trying to climb over Jacob and turn the car around. 

“That’s Carlise’s car! Jacob, turn back! Please turn back right now, it’s Carlise’s Mercedes!” Bella’s voice was high pitched, the tears clear in her tone. 

“Jacob, stop the car.” Kiera said, watching the scene unfold with wide eyes. Bella was acting like a madwoman, her breathing erratic and words spilling together as she continued to beg for Jacob to turn the car around. “Stop the damn car before we crash!”

Jacob stopped in the middle of the road, the old Chevy’s tires screeching against the asphalt. “Fine, fine! But I’m waiting outside, do you two hear me? If your leech can’t keep their hands to themselves, I don’t care what the treaty says, I’m coming in!”

“Fine, just turn around!” Bella snapped.

Jacob looked at the ceiling of the car, closing his dark eyes for a moment. With a sigh, Jacob turned the car around and pulled back into the Swan’s driveway. Bella didn’t even wait for the car to come to a full stop- she crawled over Kiera and opened the door, stumbling out of her truck and running up the walkway.

Kiera slipped out behind her, frustration bubbling beneath her skin. She was going to throw this vampire into the sun for his poor timing. Bella had already been through the wringer today, she really didn’t need one of the Cullens marching back into her life like they still had any place in it. 

But when she walked into the doorway, there was no tall blonde doctor waiting for them. Instead, it was the shortest girl Kiera had ever seen- even shorter than Ramona- and she was staring at them both with a mixed look of utter shock and relief.

“Alice!” Bella cried, flinging herself into the girl’s arms.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> AN: Jacob won’t change from sunshine boy with a puppy crush to creepy mean Eclipse Jacob. Also, what do you think is going on with Kiera? Is it just a Kiera thing, or is it something more? And what about that hallucination of Seb? Freaky right?
> 
> Give me all your thoughts in the comments! :D


	5. Romeo's Choice

The side-eye Kiera was giving the small vampire could go down in history. 

Curled up on the couch, heads bent together as they spoke, Alice and Bella looked like the best friends Bella said they were. Little shared smiles, casual touches between two friends. It all itched at Kiera’s skin. Every once in a while, when the conversation dulled, Alice’s ochre eyes would slide over to Kiera and she’d grin at her. 

As if they were friends. 

As if she  _ knew _ her. 

Kiera wasn’t above admitting that the green-eyed monster of jealousy was paying her a visit, but this was on another level. Alice  _ scared _ her. Kiera knew what the vampire could do, knew she was a seer. So what had Alice seen of her? 

Has she seen her?

Kiera tried to occupy herself with looking around the room she’d come to know so well. From Charlie’s worn leather armchair that she slouched in, to the fading bright blue paint that covered the walls. Her favorite spot was always the fireplace as of late, and even now she snuggled further into her oversized cardigan to both escape the chill and Alice’s all-knowing gaze.

The room didn’t look to be Charlie’s style at all, it must have been Renee’s doing before she left. It’s touches of Renee and Bella swallowed any of Charlies. Kiera could only wish she meant half as much to someone someday, even if it made her sad for poor Charlie. It also scared her that people could be so attached to one another, that they would move on even when caused pain.

Bella was a prime example of the Swan’s tenacious grip on those they loved. Kiera couldn’t find if she loved her for it, or feared for her as she sat next to the Cullen girl.

“Edward only checks in every few weeks. We don’t really hear from him. Rosalie and Emmett are away at college in Cambridge, so it’s been kind of hard without them-”

“Are they really away, or is that what you tell everyone?” Bella asked quietly. Before Alice could come up with a lie, Kiera interrupted. 

“You do not need to lie in front of me.” Kiera blurted. “I already know. It’d be hard to miss a vampire, even if your eyes are a...strange...color. ”

The silence that followed was cringe-worthy. Alice was wide-eyed and had her mouth agape, turning to look at a blushing Bella.

“She’s family, Alice.” Bella said. She lifted her chin and stared at Alice with steel in her voice that sent a look of surprise across Alice’s face. “She’s been here for me since all of you  _ left _ . She deserved to know.”

“If it makes you feel better, I’ll keep your secret. Just like I’d want you to keep mine if you stick around long enough to know it.” Kiera didn’t really care about Alice’s feelings on the matter. But looking at Bella’s face, wavering in front of her ‘best friend’, Kiera could suck it up.

Alice’s face lit up like a Christmas tree. In a nanosecond, she was in front of Kiera, clutching her hands in her icy grip.

“You mean you aren’t human?! That makes things so much easier!” Alice was nearly nose to nose with Kiera now. “Oh, I’m so glad we’ve finally met!”

“You might want to give her some space, Alice.” Bella warned, a smile to her lips.”She’s been known to bite.”

Kiera couldn’t help the grin she made, but it fell apart as she remembered Alice’s words. “Finally met?” 

Alice mimed zipping her lips with a wink. 

“Oh, wow, I’m really not going to like your power am I?” Kiera mumbled. Goosebumps ran across her skin at the thought that she’d been right. Alice  _ had _ seen her.

Alice’s trill of laughter flirted the line between musical and manic. Kiera shared a grimace with Bella, the look on her face making Bella choke on the tea she’d been nursing. Alice suddenly sat up straight, her face twisting with disgust.

“Girls, what is that God awful smell?” Alice asked.

“You don’t smell any better yourself, you walking corpse.” Jacob rumbled, stepping into the living room. 

Jacob seemed a thousand feet tall as he towered in the doorway. Alice was across the room in an instant, crouched on top of the fireplace mantle, a wicked hiss escaping from her lips. Kiera leaned back in her seat, knuckles going white as she clutched the armrests. The two locked gazes, their age-old rivalry showing in every inch of their tensed bodies. 

“Quit moving so fast, you’ll give them whiplash.” Jacob said, rolling his eyes.

He plopped onto the couch, spreading his arms across the back. Like Jacob were the sun, Bella gravitated to him, leaning into his side and soaking up all his warmth. Jacob shot Kiera a grin and patted the seat next to him, smiling wider when Kiera shrugged and got up. Sitting next to Jacob was like sitting next to the fireplace, and immediately Kiera was hooked.

“You're crazy warm, Jake.” Kiera mumbled sleepily, burrowing into his side. It was the warmest she’s been in days. “It’s nice.”

“It’s a wolf thing.” Jacob said with a smirk. “We are always burning like a furnace. Makes for the best cuddles.”

Alice’s eyes narrowed and a childish pout pulled at her lips. “Werewolves are awful friends to keep, especially for you Bella.” 

She was so graceful as she walked, like a prima ballerina, barely touching the floor as she climbed down from the mantle and occupied Kiera’s spot. Something about the way she held herself screamed ‘new money’, and Kiera could bet the entire twelve dollars in her pocket that it had to do with being a vampire. From the punkish yet obviously runway-ready clothing she wore to the pricey statement jewelry she sported, Alice was not above showing off her wealth.

Ramona’s job as a private lawyer did them pretty well, but Bella had been right about the Cullens living a life of opulence. Lucky them, Kiera guessed.

“Neither are vampires, it seems.” Kiera said. She immediately tucked her face into Jacob’s side, biting the inside of her cheeks. “Sorry.” 

Jacob didn’t bother hiding his laugh, and Alice didn’t bother hiding the hurt that bloomed across her face.

“You aren’t wrong. I really am sorry for leaving, Bella. I didn’t think it’d end up like this.” Alice looked down at her tiny hands, playing with the many rings that adorned them. “I’d take it all back if I could.”

“I know, Alice. I know.” Bella didn’t sound sad anymore. She only sounded defeated. 

The room lapsed into silence and Kiera immediately felt bad for making things awkward. Jacob glanced at the girl who had appeared so suddenly in his life and seemed to take pity on her. She was so pale, her normally tawny skin that reminded him so much of the forest soil washed out and bleak. 

“So, Cullen.” Jacob started, hand finding Bella’s and gripping it close. “Are you here alone, or should we expect your family to show their faces sometime soon? If it was your guilt that brought you here, Bella doesn’t want it.”

Kiera was relieved she wasn’t the only asshole in the room, at least. 

Alice sniffed delicately. “I was worried about her! I wasn’t even looking for her, but my powers are so intuned with my family that visions just come to me. I saw her fall off that cliff, and then everything went black.”

Once again, she played with her rings. Kiera had seen that look on her face before. The fear of losing someone you love is crippling, and the anguish in every line of Alice’s face was proof enough of how terrible she felt about the situation. Remorse was a powerful feeling, but fear has a heavier punch.

“My visions don’t work as they do in the movies,” Alice whispered. “I can only see what people decide, and I saw Bella decide to climb up to the cliffs with somebody and then I saw her fall. When the vision went black, I thought the worst.”

“That might also be a wolf thing?” Bella glanced around. “If there’s no difference in my environment but Jacob, then it must be related to him.”

“That’s kind of a relief.” Jacob said. “I don’t need you snooping around pack business.”

“How did you fall anyways?” Alice asked, tilting her head to the side.

“It’s kind of my fault she fell.” Jacob reluctantly admitted. “I scared her when I heard Kiera talking about how she wasn’t human. I didn’t think, it was just instinct to make sure she wasn’t a threat. But seeing her save Bella proved she wouldn’t hurt anyone. Even if she did take a chunk out of my cheek with her needle teeth.”

Kiera wanted the earth to swallow her whole. Would he ever stop bringing that up, or would the entire world know?

“Your kind has fangs?” Alice asked excitedly. 

“No, we usually don’t. But I seem to be an anomaly. I still have to talk to Ramona about this, there’s something off about all of this.” 

“It was pretty impressive, even if it was scary as hell at the time. Paul really seemed to dig you.” Jacob snickered, only stopping when Bella elbowed his stomach and Alice’s gaze become curious.

“Paul?” She asked, narrowing her eyes on Jacob.

“That redhead has been around lately.” Kiera interrupted, not wanting to talk about Paul or his stupidly beautiful bone structure. “Laurent is gone, but Victoria has been creeping around. Even made a special guest appearance in my house.”

“Freak.” Jacob muttered. “Who watches someone else shower?”

“Victoria is here?! And she watched you shower?!” Alice sat up ramrod straight, her hand going for her phone. “I should tell the family about this.”

“Don’t worry about it, the pack has got it covered. If she comes back, she’s a goner.” Jacob promised, giving Bella a small smile. 

“I’m not sure I should so that.” Alice muttered. “I know of a least three people who would have my head if something happened here.”

“That’s all fine and dandy, but look at these two. Bella is exhausted, and Kiera looks busted. We should call it a night and talk about it again in the morning. Maybe you should go.”

Bella squawked at Jacob’s words. “Jacob, this is my house! She’s staying the night, right Alice?”

Alice nodded, a wide smile on her face. “I’m staying in Forks until further notice. It’d be nice to have a sleepover.”

“Then I guess we are all having a big slumber party.” Jacob answered, shrugging his massive shoulders. Bella only rolled her eyes and sighed, finally taking her hand from his.

“Can you even sleep?” Kiera asked, her own eyes closing against her will. 

“No, but Jacob is right. You two should get some sleep, we can all talk more in the morning.”

“Alice?” Bella got up. “Can you help me get blankets?”

“Sure thing!” Alice zipped off the couch, leaving Kiera and Jacob alone in the room.

“This is going to be one awkward night.” Kiera sighed, easily accepting Jacob’s offer for the couch. He laughed and laid on the floor next to her, his hands behind his head and gaze up at the ceiling.

“When is it not, with a vampire hanging around?” A pillow hit him square in the face, doing nothing to smother his small shriek. 

“Enough with the stupid cliche rivalry!” Bella said sternly. “Let’s just go to bed, alright?”

“Fine by me.” Jacob grumbled, taking the pillow and turning his back to where Bella stood.

“Alright.” Kiera said.

* * *

When they woke up the next morning, Jacob was elbow deep in every box of cereal the Swans had. Kiera stared mournfully at the box of Honeycomb, wondering when the last time he washed his hand was. Horror stories courtesy of Ramona of men not washing their hands often enough dogged every step she took towards Jacob. 

Without warning, Kiera ripped the box of Honeycomb from his hands, his outraged face making her whine. “Did you wash your hands before sticking them in Bella’s cereal?”

Jacob was about to retort when Bella and Alice entered the room. He deflated, looking off the side and said something under his breath.

“What was that?” Alice asked sweetly, a wide grin on her face. 

“I said no.” Jacob muttered. “Sorry Bells. I just got so hungry, it’s been nonstop since I started phasing.”

Bella sighed. “I don’t even care about the cereal right now. Keep eating, I’ll make Kiera and I some eggs and toast or something.”

Jacob stuck out his tongue at Alice and Kiera, holding out his hand smugly. “You heard the lady.”

“You have five boxes of cereal opened in front of you,” Kiera said dryly. “You sure you need this one too?”

“I’m a big growing boy, and I just so happen to love Honeycombs the most.” Despite how hard she tried, Kiera couldn’t help sharing his cheeky smile. With a playful roll of her eyes, she handed him back the box which he took eagerly, plunging his hand into the bag like a man starved.

Kiera pulled out the chair next to him, gently lowering her aching body into it. Everything was sore- she could swear even her hair hurt. And the kitchen was casting everything in a surreal light, making the room seem fake. The burnt orange walls did nothing to boost Kiera’s low energy, making it easy for her to put rest her head on her arms.

“Something wrong?” Alice asked, perching on the edge of the island table. 

It was a perfectly innocent question. A kind one, even. But Kiera was so exhausted that she didn’t even bother lifting her head as she spoke.

“Nothing out of the ordinary.” Kiera sighed. “I never expected it to feel this heavy.”

“What is ‘it’?” Alice gestured, her nose wrinkling adorably.

Kiera giggled groggily to herself, barely lifting her head to mime zipping her lip. Alice got the reference immediately and tipped her head back in laughter.

“I’m not going to like what’s going on, am I?” Alice shook her head with a wry smile. “Fine. You may keep your secrets for now.”

Jacob’s brick of a phone dinged. The thick plastic smelt funny against his warm hands, the odd shape looking more like a remote than a phone. Jacob’s face turned somber at what he saw.

“Sam asked me to talk to you, Bells,” Jacob said. “Alone, please.”

Alice and Kiera shared an unimpressed look. With all the fluidity of a hummingbird, Alice flitted from the kitchen and out into the backyard, the door swinging gently with the wind behind her. Kiera happily took the toast Bella handed her before pulling herself to her feet and following Alice out. Alice was already walking along the length of a tree branch when Kiera shut the door behind her.

Alice’s slim limbs were delicately hoisted above her head, her eyes straight ahead and far away as if she could do this in her sleep. Watching Alice do it, she made it seem so easy. Tight rope walkers would be jealous of just how truly graceful the vampire is.

After a Metamorphosis, a Diwata would still behalf as strong or fast as a vampire. Kiera never really had compared the two, there’d never really been a need. But watching Alice look like she was walking on air made Kiera wonder if she’d ever walk that easy too. Nothing about Alice screamed ‘predatory’, and yet, everything about her did.

From her large golden eyes to the unnatural beauty, any human could have explained it away as contacts and a killer skincare routine. But there was no explanation for the brilliant way her skin shone under the rays of the sun. It wasn’t dramatic, it wasn’t a blinding light. Alice’s skin looked bounced the sunlight around her in a soft blur like she was walking encased in a gentle halo of light.

It immediately sent Kiera’s guard up.

It took her a few moments to reason that was probably meant to happen. Like a frog with vibrant colors to warn off hungry onlookers, vampires must shine to warn their prey. 

“Are you nervous?” Alice turned abruptly in place, the branch barely shifting beneath her feet. “You look rather nervous.”

“Your skin, it looks….glowy,” Kiera admitted sheepishly with a smile. “It’s a bit odd is all. I’ve never seen anything like it, not this close.”

“Humans are always attracted to the sparkly look, it’s like a moth to a flame, they can’t really look away.”

“That actually makes more sense than what I was thinking of. It seems more like a warning sign.”

“You really aren’t human.” Alice mused. “But I’m glad for it.”

Kiera could see how much Alice meant that. She’d never stopped to think about making friends of the supernatural variety- she’d never really thought of making friends before meeting Bella. But the understanding that supernatural creatures could give each other, the harbor of safety that was brought by hanging around people like you...Kiera thought it was unmatchable.

“I really do wish we could have met under better circumstances.” Alice interrupted Kiera’s pondering, her smile apologetic. “Leaving was never apart of the plan, but Edward insisted.”

Kiera tucked that bite-sized piece of information away to unpack later. “So Edward is your coven leader?”

“No, not at all. Carlise is our father and Esme is our mother. Edward is just the second oldest in vampire years and Carlise’s first creation. He’s a bit of a spoiled prince if you ask me.”

“You seem pretty spoiled yourself, with your nice clothes and cars.” Kiera laughed. 

“But having to move because he said so? That’s a different kind of spoiled.” Alice shook her head. “But since Bella was only involved due to Edward, we thought it’d make her life easier.“

“But Alice, you can see just as clearly as I can that that isn’t true. You're absence almost destroyed her.”

“I know.” Alice said softly, jumping down from her branch. Her feet didn’t make a sound as they hit the grass, the ground swallowing her footsteps up. 

An image of racing Alice through the trees, their laughter mingling in the forest air and their skin being caressed by the leaves suddenly hit her. Kiera swallowed thickly. Behind Alice, the trees whispered her name, calling her to fold into their embrace. But Kiera stayed rooted where she stood, and honed in on Alice’s face.

Alice was still talking, unaware of Kiera’s internal plight. “I refuse to listen to him about this ever again. I should have known that if Bella needed us gone, she’d have sent us away her self.”

“It’s hard to remember that humans have agency when you yourself aren’t human.” Kiera relented. “I can also imagine that it’s not easy to go against your family’s wishes.”

“Coven’s aren’t a democracy. The leaders decide, and the rest follow. I don’t know of any other way.” 

Kiera’s brows raised. “Surely you remember what it was like as a human?” She asked.

“Nope.” Alice popped the ‘p’, her lips twisting with a bitter smile. It didn’t belong on a face so youthful and perfect, but Kiera could only guess what a life without memories is like.

In a way, they’d both lost good chunks of time. Their lives had been taken into the hands of another and warped beyond repair. Would Kiera feel this same ache for the rest of the Cullens when she met them? She couldn’t tell, not with the anger for Bella still burning brightly. But Alice, at least, could be released from it for the time being.

Kiera took tentative steps forward and clasped Alice’s hand in her own. She didn’t know what she could say, what comfort she could offer. So together they just stood, cold hand in cold hand, basking in the morning light.

Something clattered from inside the house, and the moment was broken. Kiera and Alice shared a questioning look, both of them deciding to take a peek through the kitchen window. Kiera’s mouth dropped open, breath coming from her tired lungs in a gasp.

Jacob and Bella were lip locked. 

Alice made a strangled noise and made a move towards the door, but Kiera grasped her shoulder. The two stared on as Bella broke the kiss and tilted her face away from Jacob’s lips, her pale skin turning scarlet. Bella’s doe brown eyes glanced to the window, catching sight of her friend’s shocked faces. She stumbled away from Jacob, burying her face in her hands.

“Oh my God.” Kiera said.

“I know!” Alice said, tugging gently against Kiera’s hold. 

Jacob gave them an annoyed little wave, frustration clear in the set of his features. Luckily for him, the phone rang before Alice could storm in and ask fifty thousand questions. Alice froze in place when Jacob picked up on the third ring.

Kiera couldn’t hear what he said before he hung up, but by Bella’s enraged reaction, Kiera knew it must have been something stupid. Alice ripped herself from Kiera’s hand and flew inside, leaving Kiera standing alone like an idiot. 

By the time she got to the doorway, Alice was trying to calm a hysteric Bella and Jacob looked on guiltily. 

“What is it?” Kiera asked, frantically looking between the three of them for an answer. Jacob only looked away, shame on his face as Bella began to cry.

“He’s going to the Volturi! Kiera, he’s going to die!” Bella’s voice cracked beneath the weight of her agony, her nails embedding themselves into the flesh of her palms.

“Who? Who is going to die?” Kiera immediately thought of Charlie, for some reason. A fierce need to protect the human man flared up, and Kiera was trembling with the need to help him. 

“My brother, Edward. He was told about me coming here, about Bella jumping off the cliff- he thinks she’s dead. Now he wants to go to the Volturi and die too.” Alice’s voice was a song of torment, each word hitting Bella like a punch.

Kiera didn’t waste time gathering her friend up in her arms. She shot Jacob a scolding look over Bella’s shoulder, in disbelief that he picked up the phone as if he lived there. No amount of love for Bella justified sending her into this kind of spiral, and she was mystified how a simple miscommunication could bring this to fruition. 

“Alice, can you try and see what would happen if we left right now?” Kiera didn’t need to specify to where Alice was well aware of what she meant.

“I’m already on it.” Alice confirmed, her eyes once again glazing over as she peeked past the veil of time. She came out of it with a gasp, her hand coming to rest on her forehead. 

“It’ll work, but just barely. We need to move now!” Alice immediately flitted up the stairs and into Bella’s room, most likely to pack a bag for Bella. Kiera didn’t have time to think about herself, she was already pulling Bella out the door and to Carlisle’s car.

Jacob followed their every step, his words falling on deaf ears. “Bella, Bella please stay. I’m sorry, I shouldn’t have picked up the phone, but please stay.”

Bella spun from Kiera’s grasp to stand face to face with her childhood friend. “You could have cost him his life, Jake! I have to go, if I don’t he’ll die.”

Alice blurred past them both, honking the car in impatience. “Come on you guys, we need to get going now!”

Bella didn’t spare Jacob another look before flinging herself into the car. Kiera stumbled into the backseat, lurching forward with the car before she could find her seat belt. Jacob’s hand sprang forward to grip the wheel, forcing the girls to yelp at the forced stop.

“Bella. Please.” Jacob’s voice broke. “I love you.”

“Jacob...I’m sorry. I have to go.” Bella looked at him with pitying eyes that filled with more tears. “I won’t let him die because of me.”

At an agonizing pace, Jacob slowly let go of the steering wheel and pulled himself away from the car. Without hesitation, Alice peeled down the street and they were off to save a man who didn’t want it.

* * *

They were in the air and five hours into their trip before Bella spoke. 

“Can you believe he asked me to stay?” Bella asked, her entire body vibrating with the need to move even as she sat strapped in her seat. “Edward’s life is in danger, and he just asked me to stay.”

Kiera sighed, not opening her eyes. She was slumped against her chair, the neck pillow Alice had bought her cushioning her heavy head. Time felt like molasses, slow and unyielding despite the desperation pounding in their hearts. 

“I’ve heard that love can make people do crazy things.” Kiera mumbled, tucking the blanket around her in tighter. 

“Look at Edward, he’s literally pulling a Romeo on us.” Alice sniffled, her cold hand finding Kiera’s beneath the blanket. 

It hadn’t been Kiera’s ideal situation, to be sandwiched between the window and an upset Alice. But time was of the essence and she lacked the energy needed to demand a seat closer to Bella. 

“Look at us, we’re chasing a man to Italy.” Kiera smiled. “If that doesn’t scream love, I don’t know what does.”

“We love Edward enough for this, that I understand, but what about you? You didn’t have to come.” Bella sniffled. “You could be fast asleep in your warm bed right now.”

“And miss the dramatics of your boyfriend? It’s a best friend’s job to bear witness to their friend’s crazy love life you know.” Kiera was already falling asleep, her words were coming out slurred. “I expect you to do the same for me one day.”

Whatever Bella replied with, Kiera didn’t hear it. Beneath the warm blanket and settled into the cushy seat of a first-class chair, Kiera couldn’t keep her eyes open any longer. The world of sleep claimed her at last.


	6. God's Hand

The murmurs of Alice and Bella were what Kiera awoke to. She sat up straight in her seat, her hickory colored eyes snapping open. On her tired face was the look of absolute dread, her normally golden-brown skin struck by a sickly pallor.

“What is it?” Bella asked, her lip being ravaged by her teeth. “What’s wrong?”   
  


“Ramona.” Kiera gasped. “Ramona is going to  _ kill _ me. She’s got to be so mad right now!”

“Who is Ramona?” Alice stage whispered, golden eyes bright with worry. “Do I need to fight this Ramona?”

“Oh my God, you’d lose. Trust me, my cousin is an absolute wildcat when upset. I’ll have to clean the house for the next fifty years.” Kiera groaned, wiping at her face. “I forgot to tell her that I’m flying across the world to save someone she likely hates.”

“Ah.” Alice sighed.”Well, we land in about an hour, so you can give her a call then.”

“I’m pretty sure my phone is dead by now.” Kiera said dryly, rubbing at a sleep crusted eye. “Ramona is going to kill me, so have fun with what meager belongings I leave behind.”

“Is she always this dramatic?” Alice asked, winkling her small button nose.

“Oh yeah, always.” Bella nodded sagely, the both of them watching Kiera pull the blanket back over her head to block out the world.

“You know you can just use my phone, right?” Alice went as far as to hold up her own phone, her delicate fingers wagging it back and forth.

Her only response was to give a tired grunt and a lazy thumbs up, knowing Ramona will kill her regardless of if she called or not. It’s not like they even had time for a phone call, not with Edward’s life on the line. Maybe Kiera would get lucky and she could redirect Ramona’s wrath onto him somehow, seeing as this is all his fault.

Actually, knowing Ramona, she might just go for the bait. Nodding to herself from underneath her blanketed fort, Kiera settled back into her chair to grab some last winks of sleep before they landed.

Moving through the crowd at the airport was more taxing than one would think. But every single moment that went by without their goal in sight, felt like time wasted. People crowded her on all sides, everybody and their mother was here in Volterra today, because of course, it was a holiday. If it weren’t for Alice’s vampiric strength and her lack of shame, the trio would have been lost to the stampede of red cloaks.

Dragging along the other two girls by their hands, in a comical mockery of a mother dragging along two unruly children, Alice shoved her way through. Kiera just let her, too drained to fight against the current herself.

And when Alice broke into a bright yellow Porsche? Kiera simply looked away, expression pinching as she heard it roar to life. Theft wasn’t something foriegn to her, admittedly, but times were different back then. 

If it were any other circumstance, Kiera would have planted her feet to the earth and refused to get into the stolen car.

But a life was on the line, so she could look the other way. 

“Not opposed to grand theft auto, huh?” Bella muttered, throwing herself into the passenger’s seat. 

Kiera wasted no time crawling into the back and snapping her seatbelt on, knowing Alice’s driving was only going to get worse as they traveled along the empty roads. Edward was at the heart of Volterra, the center of Italy’s vampire kingdom. It astounded Kiera how he chose the perfect yet worst place to make his stage.

Alice rolled her eyes, tossing the scarf she found and had wrapped around her neck over a dainty shoulder. Her skin gleamed in the sunlight, with just enough force to seem ethereal. But at the speed that she took off with, Kiera knew anybody who saw it would file it away in their mind as something impossible.

“That’s what you’re focusing on?” Alice tsked, her small foot pressing down harder on the pedal.

To save the ivory leather seats from her vomit, she just kept her mouth and eyes shut tightly, mentally going over what to say to Ramona. Never have they gone this long without any word for the other, it just wasn’t something they did. 

And while Diwata didn’t have leaders in their family, Ramona was her older cousin and therefore deserved to know when Kiera was heading across the world. For all that she’s done for Kiera, she would expect that much from her. Kiera couldn’t blame her for her feelings.

If she were anyone else, she really would try to spin the blame on Edward. But it was against Kiera’s nature to outright lie. The feelings of anxiety didn’t subside as Bella began to panic, gripping at the roots of her hair. 

The Porsche zipped through the streets of Volterra, finally breaching the heart of the city. Hundreds of humans walked clustered together, entire families out and about to celebrate St. Marcus. It was a sea of just red red red, there was no end in sight of the red-cloaked humans. How they were all going to pull a Moses and part this sea was beyond Kiera.

Alice shifted rapidly, pulling out a pair of long black gloves and giant sunglasses that consumed half of her face. The scarf she’d stolen was used to wrap around her head, covering the back of her neck from the sun. If they weren’t in a race against death, Kiera would have loved to comment on her very retro look.

But her fears of not being able to pass through came to fruition. A police officer stopped the car, explaining they couldn’t go any farther than this. Kiera barely had enough time to reach for Bella, her fingers just glancing off of Bella’s elbow. Just like that day when they first met in class, Kiera breathed in energy and pushed it into Bella.

“Bella just go! We will meet up with you, find the clock tower and you’ll find him!” Alice shouted.

Without her feet on the ground and without solid contact, Kiera knew it would last even shorter than it had the first time around. It was merely a gentle push, a rush of extra adrenaline for Bella, one that left Kiera slumping against the leather seats. Black spots danced in her vision, her eyes closing shut on Bella’s back as the human girl shoved her way through the crowd.

“What did you just do?” Alice asked, alarmed. She crawled into the backseat with Kiera, lifting her head and putting onto her small cold lap. 

Kiera groaned and held up a finger, needing a minute. 

“Kiera? Kiera!”

“Please cease your shouting, it’s making my head pound.” Kiera’s hands were shaking as they gripped onto Alice’s, her bleary eyes cracking open to peer out the window. “I did something I’m really not supposed to do. I just pulled some energy from the earth and shoved it at Bella, but being even a few inches off the ground makes it much more difficult.”

“So you gave her a boost?” Alice questioned. She pressed her cold hand to Kiera’s forehead, the icy touch present even through her gloves. It did nothing to soothe the fire of Kiera’s mind, though.

“Sort of, it’s like getting a spike of adrenaline for other mortals. Fully transformed Diwata can use the sun and the earth to feed on, kind of like a plant.” Kiera smiled despite the situation. “It’s never left me drained like this before, weirdly enough.”

“Let’s get you some fresh air then. Bella just found Edward, we can take a tad longer getting to them.” Alice sighed, gently putting Kiera’s hair back on the seat and scooting out of the backdoor.

It took a lot of maneuvering to make sure Alice wouldn’t accidentally bump Kiera’s head on the door frame, but eventually, they both made it out of the backseat and into the open Italian air. Alice looped one of her arms underneath Kiera’s shoulders, easily supporting both of their weights as they walked.

Kiera relaxed into Alice’s hold, thankful that somebody was there for her. The brief image of an old man and his cane entered Kiera’s mind, and she had to bite her lip to keep from laughing in Alice’s face.

“Oh, that’s not funny.” Alice pouted. “I’m not that short!”

Kiera almost burst a blood vessel laughing, tears coming to the corners of her eyes. Alice must have seen it in a vision, and Kiera commended the double from another timeline that actually shared the joke aloud. Hysteria began to bubble in her chest, and the entire walk to the beautiful but creepy castle of Volterra was filled with poorly stifled giggles.

The world was red and hazy, every face they passed looked like a blur. Like an asthmatic going up hill, Kiera’s lungs burned and every breath took her entire focus. She could weep with joy at the sight of the Volturi castle in front of them, the old building dwarfing both girls in it’s impressive shadow.

She could only stare in absolute awe at the sight before her. The Volturi obviously lived that lavish life, the gothic architecture of the castle speaking of a clan drowning in money. Kiera could hear just make out Bella and a man speaking in low tones beyond the doors. 

Bella’s love for Edward had to be nothing short of a tragedy. She’d come to save the one who’d help break her, and Kiera couldn’t wrap her fuzzy head around it.The hurt she spoke with sobered Kiera’s cloudy mind. 

It was a reminder of what they came here for, a reminder of what Edward had done to Bella. What all the Cullens had done. Kiera carefully pried herself from Alice’s grasp and took a step away, clearing her throat.

“Thank you.”

Alice eyed her in curiously and gave a bright smile. “Of course! Now let’s save my stupid brother.”

Kiera’s brows furrowed, confused as to what could possibly be happening now. Alice pushed against the giant metal doors, something snapping in half from the other side. An intake of breath greeted them both, and suddenly Kiera was staring at two new vampires, their red eyes gleaming like rubies in the softly filtered sunlight.

One was impossibly tall and broad in the shoulders, his gaze searching as he looked down at her from over his nose. Both he and the man beside him were dressed in the darkest of blacks, their clothes nearly blending into the dark of the room. His companion was shorter, with Grecian features and artfully arranged sandy hair. His eyes were locked on Alice, mouth parting open slightly.

A glance at Alice confirmed she was much the same, her golden eyes wide in shock.

Edward must have said something rude, but all that came out was a terrible hissing noise. The smaller of what Kiera assumed to the Volturi snapped his attention to Edward and roared, spittle flying and the sound leaving an unnerving ring to Kiera’s ears. His eyes bleed into two dark animalistic pools of black, a color Kiera hadn’t seen from a vampire before.

In a flash, Alice was next to him, standing on her tippy toes to lay a small hand against his cheek. All of the tension was extinguished from his body beneath her touch, his look turning to one of reverence. 

“Shh, shh, it’s alright.” Alice murmured, barely audible. “What’s your name?”

“Demetri,” Demetri rasped. “Your name is Alice, correct?”

Alice’s smile was beatific. “Mary Alice Brandon, in the stoney flesh.”

Her smile fell a fraction, Demetri’s thumb coming to rest just next to the corner of her lips. “What is it?”

“I never saw you coming.” Alice whispered. “Not once.”

Whatever cosmic connection had been made between the two, Kiera didn’t want to see anymore. She turned to look at Edward and Bella, all three of them sharing a look of discomfort. Bella reached a hand towards Kiera, becoming her friend over as she stood in Edward’s embrace.

“Edward, this is Kiera. Kiera, meet Edward.” Bella said softly, taking her lip between her teeth.

Edward suddenly looked a thousand years old, his eyes becoming tired. He smiled at Kiera as if they’d known each other for years, nodding to her and mouthing a ‘thank you.’

Kiera reluctantly stepped forward, taking hold of Bella’s hand. The strangely tall vampire was watching Bella now, a hunger in his eyes. Edward shot him a warning look, his smile turning to a frown when the vampire only smirked.

“Guys, this is Demetri.” Alice announced, pulling a wary Demetri behind her. “Everything is going to be alright.”

The look she and Edward shared was confirmation that Edward must also have some sort of gift. Maybe he had a form of telepathy? From the way he and Alice seemed to have their own private conversation, it’d make sense. His gaze turned to Kiera and he laughed a little as he spoke.

“You’re correct. I am telepathic. But I can just barely hear your thoughts. I thought Bella was the only one who I was unable to hear.” Edward’s voice was just like Bella had described, each word smooth and perfectly pronounced. 

A tinge of a Chicagon accent coated his musical speech, surprising Kiera. In fact, all their accents surprised her. Half of her had forgotten that vampires were human once, and had come from all over the world. It’s not like in the old horror movies, there were none from Transylvania to be found.

“When we get home, I’d love to pick your brain.” Edward smiled, his hand stroking Bella’s arm.

“Only if I can pick yours in return.” Kiera eyed him.

Like a ghost, a young girl materialized before them. Her eyes burnt brightly, a ferocity in them that would have terrified Kiera if she weren’t so tired.

“Hello Jane.” Edward said, eyes wary.

“Aro wants to see what’s taking so long, Demetri.” When she spoke, her voice sounded angelic. It instantly warred against the cruelty in her gaze as she scanned Bella and Kiera head to toe, all before turning and stalking away.

Demetri held Alice’s hand in his, his thumb tracing circles against her skin. “It’ll be alright.”

Kiera wasn’t so sure they could trust him. But the way Alice looked at him, like she actually trusted his words, gave Kiera pause. She’d spare her questions and judgements for later, she was more concerned on making out of this creepy castle alive.

The Cullens made sure to barricade Bella and her between them, once again sharing in a secret conversation. Kiera couldn’t find it in herself to care, just thankful she had Bella to lean on as they walked through the halls of Volterra. Jane lead them, her black cloak blowing gently behind her with each graceful step.

It almost lured Kiera to sleep even as she walked, her lids closing halfway. She blinked harshly, giving herself a little shake in hopes to stay awake. Bella gripped her hand tighter, trying to give some reassurance. At least if Kiera died today, she would die with her best friend at her side.

She’d missed what they said about the secretary, exhaustion settling into her bones. She couldn’t even force any sense of alertness as they stepped through a set of double doors and into a large stone room. Immediately, her eyes zoomed in to the long wooden table overflowing with papers to the five figures sitting at it. 

These vampires were nothing like the ones Kiera had seen before. Still as statues and with veins that more closely resembled cracks coursed over their skin, these vampires were nearly old as time. A milky white film covered a couple of the vampires' eyes, giving the image of a sickly albino lat rat.

“These are the Kings and Queens of the Volturi. You’ll address them with respect.” Jane said, her voice deadly calm. 

“Sister, you were sent to get two and you come back with two and a half. How in character.” A young boy said stoically, his face a matching set to little Jane.

Kiera’s brown furrowed. Two and a half? When it clicked, she rolled her eyes. Edward and Alice were the two, with Bella being the half. Kiera probably didn’t even make the list due to her dying state. 

How typical.

One of the vampires sitting at the table rose, his long silky black hair fluttering behind him with each careful step he took. His eyes were on Alice and Demetri’s still locked hands, a smile of surprise and satisfaction pulling at his lips. 

“That’s Aro.” Edward whispered to Bella and Kiera. “Next to him is Caius and Marcus. The women are Athenodora and Sulcipia.”

“Alice. How wonderful to see you again.” Aro clapped. 

But like he couldn’t help himself, Aro’s attention turned on Bella. Once again Kiera was barely worth the notice, and she felt just fine with that as Aro stepped into further Bella’s orbit. 

“Oh, what’s this? Edward’s beloved is still mortal?” The calculating glint to his eyes was clear as day to anyone who dared to look closer. Beyond the mischievous smile and gentle accent, Aro was taking clear stock of everybody in the room, categorizing them from most to least interesting.

Too bad for Bella, being as his scope has zoomed in on her and only her. Even Edward at her side didn’t hold a candle to the curiosity Bella’s mere presence brought. Edward stepped before her, and this gaze Kiera a chance to truly study the vampire. Bella’s blind adoration for him had smoothed out any inconsistencies to her stories of him, painting Edward in a prettier light than Kiera would have.

With tousled bronze hair and a lean, lithe figure, Edward was more boy than man. Though physically in his early twenties like Kiera, Edward had a youthfulness to him that betrayed him. Bella’s tales of a hauntingly beautiful young man didn’t paint this exact portrait, not exactly.

The dark circles under his deep ochre gaze coupled with his high cheekbones made him look ill. His thin and tall frame spoke volumes of how he’d suffered in his last days. Sick from the Influenza, Edward was truly left a beautiful corpse.

His knowing gaze startled Kiera from her thoughts. How inconvenient that he could only hear parts of them- she’d never know just what was safe inside her mind. A guilt she hadn’t expected clenched at her gut. He couldn’t help the way he died, not any more than she could.

“Edward, nice to see you once more. Come, shake an old man’s hand.” Aro smiled, the points of his razor sharp fangs almost gleaming. 

The ginger didn’t hesitate, likely knowing it was futile. His hand was eagerly encased by both of Aro’s, the king's eyes fluttering shut. Kiera wondered what gift he had, if he needed to touch someone for it to work. 

“Ah. A shame, really. I had thought you would want your beloved to live alongside you, but it seems you do not wish her to be immortal.” Aro sighed as if truly put out. “A pity, really.”

He dropped Edward’s hand, his attention once again focusing on Bella. “But what an amazing immortal she could make. Let us see if I can read her any better than you can.”

“Aro can see every thought you’ve had, through a single touch.” The tall vampire said, a grin full of malice aimed towards Bella. It was the grin of a cat playing with a half dead mouse, almost bored but still unable to resist playing it’s game.

The hairs on the back of Kiera’s neck rose. She shuffled closer to Alice, ignoring the piercing look of Demetri as Alice used her free arm to wrap it around Kiera’s waist. Her eyes could only follow Aro’s movements, his hands eclipsing Bella’s.

After a moment, Aro’s mouth twitched. He opened his eyes, fascination written across every inch of his face. “How remarkable. Not a thing.”

Bella dropped her hands from Aros and stumbled back into Edward’s arms, trepidation in her steps. Edward’s face became fierce, a flat ‘no’ falling from his lips. 

Aro dismissed his no, calling over his shoulder for Jane to step forward. Before he could say another word, the room was turned into a battlefield. Edward surged forward, heading straight for Jane, only to be brought to his knees. Kiera stumbled backwards, trying to pull her friend with her to no avail. Bella twisted from her grasp and lunged for Edward, carelessly throwing herself on top of his convulsing body.

Jane’s eyes turned upon Bella and the world held its breath. Bella and Jane stared at each other, one wary and the other increasingly angered. Edward’s torture had stopped, only remembered by the pained look on his face and the tremor of his limbs. As another second passed, and another, Jane’s anger only grew.

Her power, whatever it was, could not work on Bella.

“Wonderful, just wonderful! How this situation grows in curiosity. I would like to see how immortality would mold you, but it seems even now Edward doesn’t wish to turn you. It really is a shame, my dear.” The look on Aro’s face melted into one of hunger. “But you’ll make for a great meal.”

“Stop! Stop, I’ve seen it! I’ll turn Bella myself!” Alice gasped, pulling against Demetri’s steel grip. “I can show you.”

Aro’s disappointment warred with his own brutal need to _ know _ . Kiera knew the feeling, the drive to taste one’s secrets. She could admit preferred Aro’s dangerous curiosity to his craving for her friend. 

Alice and Demetri stepped forward as one, Alice’s free hand reaching forward to reveal all that she’s seen. The time, Aro’s eyes remained open as he flickered through Alice’s thoughts, the amusement in his eyes. This was all a game to him.

Alice tried to retract her hand, but Aro’s grip only tightened. A hunger of a different kind, a hunger for power, flickered across his face. It was gone within a blink, and Alice’s hand was freed. 

“A happy ending indeed.” Aro smiled, a childish glee to his tone. He clapped his hands once before turning to the figures at the table. “It is true! Bella will be one of us.”

A young blonde man with a cutting glare and sharper features scowled. “I do not think they should go.” 

“Caius, no rules have been broken! Bella is mortal, but she will not be for long. The situation will rectify itself soon enough.” Aro said, his smile unwavering.

Caius’s scowl only deepened. Whatever biting comment he was about to say was cut off by a harsh looking woman’s elbow to his rib. She, like her companion, was glacier in her beauty. Her rapunzel long platinum tresses spilled across the table as she moved into Caius’ space, leaning her thin frame against him. 

“Love, he is correct. Let the lovers go.” She spoke soothingly, as if to not anger her beast of a husband.

“Athenodora agrees, brother. It is settled then, yes?” Aro asked the table. 

Marcus and Sulpicia barely lifted their eyes from the mound of paperwork, only looking to Aro long enough to give a nod of their heads. To them, the entire situation must have been more of a nuisance than entertainment. Sulpicia went as far as the wave them off, like their very presence annoyed her.

Carefully, Bella helped Edward stand, their attention once more on each other. Sucked back into their own world, they paid Aro no attention until he turned to Kiera at last.

“And you, my dear.” Aro tutted. “You look like you are arriving on death’s door. Did your friends not realize how poor your condition is?”

A lump formed in her throat and for a moment Kiera couldn’t speak. She tried to clear, only for it to turn her voice hoarse. “I’m sure they know now. Life as a Diwata can be tough. ”

It was carefully laid out, a piece of bait for Aro to snatch up. It was the only bargaining piece she had left, as weak as she was and as strict as their rules against humans knowing were. If they knew what she was, would it keep her alive? 

Diwata don’t have the highest standing in the supernatural world, but they weren usually respected as protectors of the earth. The earth has a vampire diet living on it, so maybe Aro would afford to give Kiera respect just for that? Or was that a foolish thought?

Kiera hated not knowing.

“What a strange collection you’ve amassed yourself, Isabella.” Aro chuckled. “Is it true you are like Bella here? Edward painted such a strange picture of you in his mind. Such an odd being you are, Miss Kiera.”

To her surprise, it was Edward who spoke up. “Trying to read her mind is like trying to tune into a far off radio station. Most of what I can channel is static.”

“And even Alice cannot see her future?” Aro pressed.

Edward seemed pained to share any information with the man, his jaw ticking. “Alice has seen pieces, but most of it is also static.”

The bomb dropped and Kiera’s stomach rolled. She knew Alice had seen her. It was like Kiera was looking at a board game, with all the pieces set out, but watching as a few were plucked right from her hands. Her control of her own life was slipping through her fingers. Kiera wondered if Alice had foretold any of these events, if she’d seen the kind of carefully contained manic glee form into Aro’s face at the room full of new playthings.

Kiera mourned any sense of privacy she and Ramona once had. With Bella in her life, the Cullens would be able to pluck any information they wanted right from Kiera and her cousin’s pretty little heads if they had the whim to. It may have been cruel of her, but Kiera felt herself beginning to regret stepping foot into Italy.

Maybe she even regretted finding Bella that one gloomy day.

The secret hadn’t been his to give, and Kiera hissed at him from where she stood. Dozens of eyes landed on her, the weight of them lighter than she’d expect in a room of killers. 

“Kiera, your teeth!” Alice gasped.

Aro’s answering cackle was more frightening than anything that had already happened. In confusion, Kiera raised a stiff hand to her mouth, eyes widening as she felt her skin prickle from something sharp. Alice, ever ready, stepped forward to hand Kiera a compact mirror.

Kiera’s teeth were in fact razor sharp. Dozens of tiny needle point teeth crowded together, her mouth opening like a jagged cavern that doomed anything that entered. It was like the teeth of an angular fish had replaced her normal blunt ones. 

“You must sense it by now, don’t you?” Aro laughed, the entire thing a soap opera for him to consume.

“Sense what?” Kiera ground out, her words an octave deeper and slurred.

“Edward had seen you were dying, had glimpsed some of those underling dark thoughts. You’d thought something was off…” Aro sighed. “Poor dear, you were correct.”

“What? What’s wrong with me?” Kiera took a step forward, tears welling in her eyes. “What the hell is going on?”

“I’m sure that you already know.”

The world beneath Kiera rolled and shifted, pitching her into Alice’s ready and waiting arms. Alice’s words went unheard as Kiera could only stare at Aro, her vision blurring. She didn’t want to hear Aro’s next words. Whatever they were, he could keep them in his stupid smiling mouth. Kiera wheezed, the need to scream building in her core.

“Gifted with such teeth, too.” Aro chuckled.

On weak and trembling, not unlike the legs of a doe, Kiera stepped forward. But before she could move even an inch forward, she was brought to heel.

A fire like she’d never felt before took hold of her, pulling her to the tips of her feet and burning every inch of her body. Her blood boiled in her body and an animalistic keel tore it’s way out her wretched open mouth. Like the hand of God was pressing onto her bones, Kiera was thrown to the ground, left to tangle with whatever was burning her.

Across the room, she caught Jane’s vicious smile. Each time Kiera screamed, it was like Jane was stoking the fire she’d set upon her. Bella’s answering cries of anguish were all that she’d heard, mingling with Edward and Alice’s frantic shouting. Just when she thought the fire would consume her from the inside out, Aro raised a hand.

“Jane, that’s enough.” Aro said calmly. It was a tone Kiera had thought him incapable of, one full of power and clarity. “She’s learned her lesson. Haven’t you, Kiera?”

“Yes.” Kiera howled, her view becoming blocked by Edward and Bella’s backs. “God, yes, now please make it stop!”

As if blowing out a candle, Jane’s fire was snuffed. Kiera panted from where she laid on the ground, her tears finally spilling over.

Caius’ face was one of vicious glee. Her trembling turned to heaving, and Kiera let out her mouthful of bile onto the pristine tiled floor. Kiera’s body bent in two with the force of her vomiting, a weary groan escaping her spit covered lips. Edward’s hand was on her back, Bella’s hands pulling her hair from her face with a gentleness that made Kiera tear up.

Aro turns away from them, dismissing them. Kiera glared at his back. She wished she could have vomited on his ugly overpriced shoes, or on his impeccable Valentino suit. But like a child, Kiera was picked up from the cool floor and carried towards the door, her head flopping weakly onto Edward’s chest.

“I cannot believe I just vomited onto the floor of vampire royalty.” Kiera gritted her teeth, knowing her breath must stink.

“I can’t believe any of this.” Bella admitted, her eyes bloodshot. “It’s all just so surreal. I really thought we were going to die in there.”

“I would never have let that happen.” Edward protested. 

Kiera wiped her mouth with the back of her hand, already mentally bitching Edward out. All of this was his fault, she’d never concede on that. He jumped the gun instead of waiting for Charlie himself to confirm Bella’s fake death, and lead them all down this path. Now she was a joke to vampire society. 

Kiera needed to be frank with herself. The Cullens were a troublesome coven, and she doesn’t know if it’s fair to Ramona to get dragged into their bullshit. It wasn’t even fair to her. She glanced at Bella, guilt heating her face.

“You’re right about it being my fault. I’m sorry Kiera, I truly am.” Edward murmured in her ear, his voice sorrowful. 

Kiera only nodded, grudgingly taking the apology. She’d get the rest of her thoughts out of her head soon, when they were back in their home land and not across the world. She could feel herself slowly slump against Edward’s hold, her eyes fighting to stay open.

“You should sleep.” Alice sighed from next to her, her golden eyes blank with the future. “It’ll be a long, long flight back.”

But sleep didn’t come so easily this time. For the entire way back, Kiera was wide awake. Her body was exhausted, her mind was weary. But her thoughts raced through her head like a hamster on a wheel, never stopping and making too much noise to ignore. Her face was pressed against the window of the plane, her dark eyes glued to the clouds all the way home.

There would be hell to pay and decisions to be made.


	7. The Cullens

_ **These violent delights have violent ends,** _

_ **And in their triumph die, like fire and powder** _

_ **Which, as they kiss, consume** _

_ **Romeo and Juliet, Act II, Scene VI** _

The moment the car had pulled up to the Villanueva's small home, Kiera had sprung from the car on shaking legs. She stumbled through the front door without another word and straight into Ramona's arms. Any ounce of anger drained from Ramona's face, her hickory eyes glinting with concern.

Ramona had helped Kiera straight into her bed, and for two days, Kiera slept without dreaming. Her cousin stayed by her side and silenced any incoming calls, the two of them staying away from the rest of the world. When Kiera didn't wake the next day, Ramona had finally had enough.

She pushed the mattress off the bed, Kiera tumbling to the floor in a heap. Before Kiera could protest, she was lifted once more by her cousin and walked out the front door, the destination only becoming clear when they breached the first few trees. With all of her might, Kiera thrashed against Ramona's hold, her heart thumping wildly in her chest.

"We can't, Mona, not here." She croaked.

"You've avoided the forest long enough. You've been only a few times since we moved, no wonder you're so weak and tired all the time."

"I thought it was cause I'm dying." Kiera mumbled, still struggling.

"That too. But the forest can help you if you let it. We're Diwata, Kiera. The forest is the safest place for us." Ramona sighed, shifting Kiera's weight.

"For you, maybe." Kiera's words were barely above a whisper. "I hate it out here, you know that. And you know why."

"It wasn't the forest's fault." Ramona pointed out. "He could have attacked you anywhere."

"That really doesn't make me feel any better." Kiera said.

Ramona must have heard the fear in Kiera's voice because she stopped just inside the forest. Carefully, as if Kiera were more precious than the very earth they loved, Ramona set Kiera down. The soil beneath Kiera's hands and feet clung to her skin, coating her in a familiar blanket of earth. Immediately, Kiera could feel herself soaking up all the energy it offered.

It didn't ease the strain of her lungs or the ache in her cold fingers, but Kiera could feel herself breathe in time with the trees around them. Every breath opened her eyes a little more, brought her a little more comfort. Despite the calm settling over her, the woods loomed overhead. The trees stretched into the sky, the thick green foliage casting her in dim shadows.

Kiera craves the peace she knows the woods can give her. She misses the simple act of loving the forest, of trusting it to shelter her. But every inch of it only brings her dread. Memories of falling to the forest floor, the sound her own blood roaring in her ears as it sprayed the area crimson-

Kiera gasped, shuddering.

Beads of sweat dripped down her skin, the feeling of being watched trickling over her flesh. The hairs on the back of her neck stood on end. When she was sure she'd taken enough energy, Kiera rushed to her feet and sped back to the safety of their backyard. Ramona was hot on her trail, her hand clasping around Kiera's wrist.

"Kiera, Kiera stop! What's going on with you?! You've been acting odd ever since you met that Swan girl. What the hell is going on?" Ramona didn't yell, never being one to raise her voice to get her point across. But she might as well have, for the flinch Kiera gave her.

"I don't know!" Kiera shouted. "I don't know what the hell is happening to me, don't you get that yet? I told you, something's wrong with me. Even the damn Volturi knew that!"

The name drop was like a bucket of cold water. It washed over Ramona, causing her to shiver.

"That's where you were?" She asked. "In Italy with vampire royalty? What did they do, what did they say?"

Everything that happened in Volterra, every moment Kiera spent in fear or anxiety, slipped from her mouth. From the fiery torture to the cryptic words of Aro, Kiera held none of it back. With every word, Ramona went deeper and deeper into her silence. The earth was soon worn beneath her pacing feet, her frazzled energy infectious and bleeding into Kiera.

"What do you know, Ramona?" Kiera demanded, stepping in front of her cousin, trying to maintain eye contact.

Ramona could barely look at her. "I don't know for sure. Frankly, I can't even wrap my head around you surviving an encounter with a Volturi member, let alone the leaders. The earth may need us, but vampires can't even drink from us."

"They can't?" Kiera asked incredulously. "But we have blood."

"As long as you're mortal they can drink from you. But usually, when you reach maturity, you undergo Metamorphosis." Ramona ran a hand through her hair, wincing as a few thick black strands came out.

"Usually, meaning I'm doing something wrong. Again." Kiera whined. "I've been alive since eighteen-forty-three. I should be immortal by now, shouldn't I?"

Ramona's hand fell at her side, her gaze solemn. "You should be. You shouldn't have fallen under that sleeping spell, or whatever it was, either. With what Aro said, it's almost like-."

"Please, Mona. Don't." Kiera said.

"Like-" Ramona started, voice hesitant.

"Don't say it," Kiera whispered. "Whatever it is, don't say it-"

"Like you aren't even a Diwata." Ramona's finished, dark eyes terribly sad.

Kiera didn't bother to turn around to look at her. Kiera couldn't summon up any rage, not as tears slip freely down her cheeks. Ramona called out, begging Kiera to turn around. But Kiera continued walking until she got to her door, slamming it shut behind her with such a force it rattled the wood.

Kiera desperately hoped Ramona wasn't right.

* * *

It'd taken the better part of the day for Kiera and Ramona to speak again. The hurt of Ramona's words, the mere impossibility of the entire situation- it sunk it's way past Kiera's skin and settled into her heart like a thorn. It didn't make sense, they both knew that. Ramona had been there for Kiera's birth, there was no denying the bond their bloodline gave them.

But something was flawed in Kiera's design. There was no denying that any longer.

Diwata had plant-based powers, not the lightning-like energy Kiera could produce. Diwata had no fangs, no drive to rip things apart. Kiera smiled grimly to herself. It was just her luck to be the first broken Diwata.

Pretending the conversation had never happened was easier than confronting her insecurities. It made it easier for Kiera to throw herself into her studies, to finish what little chores that needed to be done. She'd taken to ignoring Bella's calls, desperately needing the time to get things back to normal. Back to where things made sense again.

On the fourth day of her radio silence, Kiera finally gave in.

"Hello?" Kiera answered, sighing for what seemed the fifth time that day.

Bella's voice was quiet, unsure. "Kiera? Are you doing alright? Why haven't you picked up the phone?"

"Not to alarm you, but I was asleep for the first two days," Kiera admitted. "I couldn't wake from my sleep, not until the third day. I got some sun in, I should be as alright as one can be when dying."

"It's hard to wrap my mind around that. I can't believe you are really dying." Bella said.

An awkward silence fell upon them both, leaving Kiera to listen to Bella's nervous breathing.

"Yeah. What did you need?" Kiera closed her eyes, resting her forehead against the cool wood of her desk.

Part of her wanted Bella to spit out whatever she was thinking, or that they could just jump back to the way things were before. But Kiera admitted there was a part to her- a bigger part- that wanted Bella to hang up the phone and never call back. Her life had been so much easier just ghosting through, Kiera didn't know if she had the strength to carry on like this. Ramona hasn't brought up relocating, but Kiera knew her cousin well enough to know that she was thinking about it.

Wouldn't it be easier on everyone, if Ramona and Kiera just moved away? Went back to a life of solitude, away from dramatic vampires and foolish human girls?

Stupidly, the part of her that would mourn for Bella's loss in her life plagued her at night. Bella was foolish, Bella was stubborn, and Bella came with a lot of danger. Kiera could see all of that as clear as a sunny day. And she knew without a shadow of a doubt that Bella's danger prone tendencies were only going to get them all into trouble again.

But Bella was also kind. Funny. And fiercely loyal, if her dedication to the Cullens was any indication. She was also Kiera's first friend...her only friend. To part with her now would be like swallowing poison, one that would slowly eat Kiera from the inside out.

"Bella?" Kiera prodded.

"...I was thinking you and your cousin could meet with the Cullens. They are rather, uh, anxious to meet you both. Especially for looking after me these past few months." Bella was fast to add on, her words tangling in her mouth.

The mental image of Bella's skin flushing brighter than cherry syrup brought a grin to Kiera's face. A feeling lighter than cotton bloomed in Kiera's chest and she let out a sigh, knowing Bella had one this time.

"Do we meet up at their home then?" Kiera asked lightly.

Bella's smile was evident even through the phone. "If you would, that'd be great. Oh, they say don't eat dinner, Esme wants to cook for us."

"Ah, you got me there. Now I'll definitely have to go and meet you're Cullens. Tonight then?" Kiera shifted in her seat, turning her face to look at the clock. The wood beneath her head was slick with perspiration, much to Kiera's chagrin.

'Gross.' She thought. 'So so gross.'

Bella was momentarily pulled away from the phone, her voice sounding low and far away as she talked quietly with someone on the other side.

"Would seven be alright?" Bella asked. She hushed whoever she was speaking to, causing Kiera to snicker.

"Seven it is then. Also, don't be too alarmed if Ramona tries to set one of the Cullens on fire with her mind or something. She's pretty upset with your boyfriend."

"She won't really try to fight him, will she?" Bella sounded alarmed and Kiera couldn't help but laugh.

"Honestly, who knows? Ramona is being unpredictable lately. She just might try to fight them all." Kiera teased.

"See you for the throwdown at seven then, I guess," Bella said dryly, before letting out a giggle of her own.

"See you." Kiera echoed. She rested the phone beside her face, leaving her to stare at it.

If it were anyone else, anyone else at all, Kiera would have held fast to her thoughts of distancing herself. But something about Bella unarmed her. The memory of Bella's haggard face from when they first met flashed through Kiera's mind. Her soon-to-be friend had looked so injured back then. So alone.

Kiera knew it'd be unfair to leave her behind just as the Cullens had. A person could only take so much rejection before breaking completely, and Kiera wouldn't be the one that broke Bella again. The dark pit deep inside her, the one that housed whatever lay sleeping in her veins, was terribly irritated at the mere idea of being forced out.

Forks is her home, now. Bella is her friend. Kiera could admit she was too selfish to leave it all behind now, even if she thought it'd be easier for her and Ramona. After all these years, Kiera finally had something that was hers.

Her smile vanished. But was this life in Forks worth the trouble?

* * *

Just on the outskirts and on the opposite of town laid the Cullen's home. Protected by the prying eyes of the town and resting amongst the shade of the trees, the house seemed ominous. If it weren't for its beautiful structure, Kiera would have asked Ramona to drive past it.

Architectural Digest would have begged for this house to be on its front cover if it ever laid eyes on it. Made of beautiful cherry woods and floor to ceiling windows, the house was flooded with light, making it stand out against the gloomy forest. Something about it was warm and inviting, begging Kiera to step inside and trail a finger against the wood, to bask in the light let in by the windows.

"Just how rich are they?" Ramona hissed as they pulled into the Cullen's driveway. "This is just ridiculous, they don't even sleep, why is the house so big?"

"I'd want my own space if I lived here too." Kiera winced, wondering if the Cullen's had heard her cousin.

"Still, can't they get their own homes? They clearly have the money for it." Ramona grumbled, putting the car in park.

Kiera didn't dignify that with an answer. What could she say, she didn't know the Cullens or why they thought the way they did. She could only shrug at her cousin, slowly climbing out of the car to make sure she couldn't be hit with dizziness. Before they could even make it to the front door, it opened before them.

"You're here!" Alice exclaimed, a wide smile on her pixie face.

Ramona turned to look at Kiera, a frown already on her face. Kiera could only pretend she didn't see it and walked into the house, smiling at Alice as she stepped aside for them. A low whistle left her as she surveyed the inside of the house. If Kiera thought the outside was wonderful, the inside was every house decorator's wet dream.

"Come on, everyone is in the living room." Alice said, bouncing on the tips of her toes. Her face was one of anticipation, and Kiera didn't trust it for a second.

As Alice lead them through the house, Kiera couldn't help but look around. Expensive decorations costing more than her house was carefully and thoughtfully placed throughout the home. She'd been right about the light, it streamed through the windows and bathed the home in its warmth, keeping it from seeming too cold.

On the wall near the stairway was a massive collection of graduation caps. Ranging from light to dark, each cap was one clearly earned by one of the Cullen's themselves. Ramona's frown only deepened at the sight of it, and Kiera knew her cousin's thoughts were on finances. It was a privilege to attend college, and it was evident that the Cullens had enough money to do it ten times over.

Their casual opulence was going to get on Ramona's nerves. Before Ramona had put herself through school and became a private lawyer, she'd been dirt poor. Even now, she used her career as a way to give back and do most cases pro bono. Kiera reached out her hand to grip her cousins, giving it a small squeeze.

Ramona's expression twisted even more as they got to the living room, and Kiera was overwhelmed by the sweet scent coming from the vampires around the room. It was cloying, sticking to the roof of her mouth and the inside of her nose. Stumbling back, Kiera hid behind her cousin to take in a deep shuddering breath.

"Is she alright?" Asked a gentle voice, one full of worry.

Kiera peeked over Ramona's shoulder, looking at the sea of beautiful concerned faces. She could barely take a glance at the Cullens, her eyes searching for one face in particular. Bella's dark doe eyes caught hers and the tension bled from Kiera. The two met each other halfway for a long hug, Kiera not so secretly using Bella's softer floral scent to cover up the smell of the Cullens.

"She's fine, she just smelt you guys." Ramona said, waving it off.

"It's the first time I've smelt so many vampires in one room," Kiera rushed to explain, her face warm. "It was like walking into the perfume store."

"We do have a unique scent." The gentle voice from before spoke again, and Kiera finally put a face to the sound.

A small and soft-looking woman with long caramel tresses reminiscent of old Hollywood starlets stood there smiling. With her round face and gracious curves, she radiated the image of a mother. Her kind eyes were a piercing gold, and just like her children, she was incredibly beautiful.

"I'm Esme. Welcome to our home, we are just delighted to have you." Esme said with warmth in her eyes.

Kiera sent a glance to Ramona, noticing her cousin hasn't moved an inch. Ramona's gaze was steady, carefully sweeping over each vampire, looking for some fault she could exploit if things turned sour. Seems the task of making friends with the Cullens was placed solely on Kiera's shoulders. She tried her best to breathe shallowly as she approached Esme, reaching out her hand for Esme to take.

Esme's returning smile was brighter than the flash of a camera, momentarily stunning Kiera with its perfection. It held a soft radiance that teeth whitening commercials always tried for but never succeeded. But despite being perfect, it was also one of the most welcoming looks Kiera's received.

"I'm Kiera Villanueva. This is my cousin Ramona. It's nice to meet you, ." Kiera said, giving a smile of her own.

"Oh, Esme is fine dear!" Esme beamed.

A man with slicked-back pale locks and an air of formality stepped forward, his arm slipping around Esme's waist as if it had always been there. Dressed in smart business casual clothing, Kiera placed him as Carlisle, the infamous heartthrob doctor. Immediately, his age eluded Kiera. His physical appearance would place him a few years younger than his wife, but the look in his eyes was one of infinite wisdom and compassion, making him seem terribly old.

The Cullen's timeless good looks just barely escaped uncanny valley territory, if Kiera were being honest. But something about the ones she's met so far was endearing enough to minimize any discomfort she would feel. It stumped her, the very idea that anyone could believe the Cullens to be human.

"I'm Carlisle. We really are happy to finally meet you both." Carlisle said.

Kiera gave his hand a weak shake, her smile becoming feeble. The Cullen's hands were just as cold as Ramonas, but with Kiera's failing health, they seemed colder than ice. Dr. Cullen's look was understanding when she pulled back just a little too fast.

"Quit hogging her and let us meet her already!" Boomed a loud voice, shaking Kiera from her thoughts.

Another couple stepped forward hand in hand, just as beautiful as Dr. Cullen and his wife but obviously much younger. Kiera gulped. They both towered over Kiera, forcing her to crane her head to look at their faces. Aphrodite incarnate stood before her with long tumbling golden curls, framing a face of an angel. She was easily the most beautiful creature Kiera had ever laid eyes on, and she felt her face flush while looking into honey eyes.

"It's nice to meet you. My name is Rosalie." Rosalie said with an unsure smile.

"Likewise." Kiera gave a smile back, one that felt a little too big for her face.

The owner of the loud booming voice spoke again, a wide lopsided grin on his handsome face. "Rosie, it looks like she likes you." He teased, dimples showing in his handsome face.

Rosalie had looked almost nervous when first coming forward, but her face eased of any tension when Kiera shared a shy smile. With a fond roll of her eyes, Rosalie elbowed her partner's side.

"Excuse Emmett, he isn't always so annoying." Rosalie said.

"Aw, Rosie, that's not nice! We all know I'm always this annoying." Emmett chuckled.

Emmett had the body of a linebacker, and his shoulders stood way above Kiera's head. She couldn't help the awkward bark of laughter that flew from her lips, frankly intimidated by how big he is. He'd mostly fit in with the shapeshifters of La Push with a stature like that- if he weren't the exact kind of monster they loathed. His curly brown hair and dimpled cheeks were the only things to break up the overall air of terrifying, giving him a childlike air.

"I'm Emmett, the lucky bastard who is married to this beauty." Emmett said proudly.

"I think I'm the lucky one." Rosalie gave Emmett a soft squeeze, placing a chaste kiss on his shoulder.

"He's not as mean as he looks." Bella whispered, giving Kiera a wry smile.

Kiera found it hard to believe to place this Rosalie with the frigid blonde from Bella's stories after speaking with her, but she must have spoken too soon. Rosalie's withering look towards Bella shut her up, and Bella looked away, bottom lip caught between her teeth.

"Yeah, I'm just a big ol teddy bear." Emmett roared with laughter, bringing out a few chuckles from his family.

"You already know Alice and Edward." Carlisle spoke, smiling at his children. The two gave Kiera their own smiles, Alice's full of excitement and Edwards unsure but there. "Jasper went out hunting-"

"He's due back any moment now!" Alice interrupted with a giggle.

The air changed before she saw him. Kiera could feel eyes on her back and turned in place, frowning at the fact that she hadn't even heard him enter. It was his butterscotch eyes that she saw first, his gaze stunned. Kiera's weak heart fluttered frantically in her chest, breath catching as she noticed the scars that covered him from head to toe. Every inch of skin visible sang with battles hard-fought and won, each silver crescent revealing Jasper as a proficient killer.

Because there were no survivors in a fight against a vampire. Vampires don't use their teeth if the goal isn't to rend their enemy to pieces and then start a pyre with their torn flesh. The revelation didn't scare Kiera.

Butterscotch bled into inky black and Jasper took a step closer.

"Jasper." Edward warned with a grimace. "You'll scare her."

"He better not," Ramona spoke, coming to stand next to Kiera with a scowl. "Do not make us regret this."

Jasper should have been terrifying. Should have made Kiera and Ramona run for the hills, his black eyes and scarred skin a warning to everyone in the area that a predator was here, and he was made for brutality. But despite being broader and more muscular than Edward, it was Emmett that scared Kiera. Fear was a funny thing, Kiera thought. It was clear Jasper was a skilled warrior, but Kiera feared Emmett's mere size more. How easily the brain is lulled into submission when faced with multiple threats, taking the one casting the biggest shadow as the one to watch out for.

"Hello." Kiera said hesitantly.

"Hello." Jasper's voice was hoarse, and it cracked around the word like a waterless desert. He was a man parched, and Kiera instinctively lowered her shin to cover more of her throat.

Jasper tracked the movement, his eyes two voids threatening to pull Kiera in. The heat behind them heightened, threatening to burn Kiera's skin where he looked. Kiera had faced very few people who had wished to do her harm, but known of them had looked at Kiera with such raw intensity, such hunger. And here she had thought Diwata had no appeal to a vampire.

"Get your dog, he's salivating all over my cousin." Ramona snapped, moving forward with her firsts clenched. "She's not a meal for him to eat."

"Jasper won't hurt Kiera, I can promise you." Alice chirps, her brows furrowing. She looked affronted at Ramona's behavior towards her covenmate, her own ire showing in the twist of her lips.

"Trust us, Kiera is in no danger from Jasper." Edward said. His expression was pinched, as if troubled. It didn't help Kiera feel safe in the least.

"I believe in Jasper." Bella said, coming to stand next to Kiera.

It was all that Kiera needed to relax her shoulders. She hadn't noticed how tense she'd become, waiting to see if Jasper was going to attack or not. What surprised Kiera even more was how confident Bella had sounded, how sure of Jasper and his actions she was. She held a faith for him she frankly shouldn't have, not after how hard he had fought to end her life on her twenty-first birthday. She hadn't known which one had attacked Bella, not for sure. Not until Jasper heard Bella spoke.

Hearing Bella speak broke whatever thrall had settled over Jasper. The man who had just been a lion on the prowl a second ago looked away with something akin to shame. An awkward silence flooded the room, and Kiera could only look at her feet. With the mood soured, she wondered if she should just go home.

"Don't go home yet." Edward speaks up, his voice gentle and pleading. "Give my family a chance, Kiera."

Kiera froze, forgetting for a moment that Edward had some access to her thoughts. It was creepy and invasive, and she made sure to let him know that with a look. Edward only lifted both hands up in surrender, a crooked smile on his youthful face.

"Can't help it. It doesn't turn off, you know. I can only hear a few of your thoughts and not all of them, luckily. It's not like I want to be in your head." Edward said.

"I do find it rather odd that neither my son or daughter can get ahold of you, Kiera." Carlisle piped up. "Would you mind letting me run a small test?"

"She's not a lab rat." Ramona grumbled.

Kiera shrugged, already exhausted with the entire situation. "That depends on what kind of test."

Carlisle smiled his Hollywood worthy smile, eyes crinkling at the corners. It gave him an almost human look, casting a fatherly light to him. It made it easier to think of him as a father of a family and not just a leader of a coven. It was nice.

"If their powers don't work that well, then would Jaspers? Is it only a mental block of sorts or is it also physical and emotional?" Carlisle mused. "It's fascinating."

"What kind of emotions are you going to make her feel, huh Jasper?" Emmett waggled his eyebrows, a wide toothy grin on his face.

"Maybe annoyance." Kiera deadpanned before her face broke into a smirk.

"Oo, she bites back! Oh wait, we already know that from Alice's tales of your fangs." Emmett said.

"Maybe we should make sure Kiera is comfortable with me testing my powers out on her first." Jasper spoke, brows furrowed. Kiera hadn't registered it before, but Jasper's voice held the faintest of Southern drawls. His words sounded like they were thick and looping, every word smooth and slow.

Memories of traveling through the South resurfaced for a few moments, filling Kiera with thoughts of a blazing sun and wide open roads ridden on the back of horses. Traveling with her cousin and mother was a highlight of her life, traveling in the south even more so. The burden of carrying a heavy camera set had let her sore and sweating something fierce; but Kiera had loved the way the families they photographed would come together, a single snapshot of their lives taken by complete strangers.

Jasper's voice was soothing, in the oddest of ways. Despite the color of ochre returning to his gaze, Kiera wouldn't forget the dark way he'd looked at her before. But his voice, the memories it conjured- it was enough to put a blam to any burning questions she had for him.

"That's be fine. " Kiera spoke slowly, thinking it over. "Just something light, please. Maybe something happy?"

Jasper's eyes softened and he nodded. "As you wish."

Jasper stared at Kiera. With every moment that passed, his expression grew stranger and stranger. Kiera couldn't fathom what he was searching for, what she was meant to be feeling. Nothing had changed for her, she was still exhausted and mildly curious, still nervous to be in the den of lions. Kiera's brows furrowed.

"I don't feel anything," Kiera admitted, sharing a glance with her cousin. "Nothing new at least."

Ramona bit her lip as she turned to Edward. "Can you read my mind?"

"As clear as day." Edward easily answered, frowning.

"What about you?" Ramona turned to Alice. "Can you see my future?"

"Actually, I can't see you at all. So far I can only see humans and vampires, probably because I've been both. It took me _years_ to see even a glimpse of Kiera. Even now, looking for her is like trying to look through thick grey fog, and it's rare to see anything at all." Alice said with frustration. It was clear she hated feeling blind, and with a glance around the room, the rest of the coven didn't enjoy it too much either.

"I wonder if you have some sort of gift." Carlisle pondered, leaning into Esme's hold.

"She does, just not the kind you're thinking." Bella sighed. "Maybe it's species related?"

"What kind of gift?" Emmett asked eagerly. "Can you shoot lasers from your eyes or fly or something?"

"Maybe I'll show you sometime." Kiera suggested, unsure.

It made her uneasy to think they would know any more about her than they already do. She glanced at Alice, wondering if she was the culprit who spilled the beans to her family about what she was. Or maybe it was Edward. Bella wouldn't have shared it, not if she didn't think it'd help Kiera in some way.

"I think that's enough talking about gifts for now." Esme interrupted, beaming. "How about our mortals eat dinner?"

"And go over what you wanted to talk about to begin with." Ramona added, sighing. "If it's about territory, we live just out of yours, and we don't share the same diet so you don't need to worry about sharing hunting grounds."

The family slowly trickled into the dining room, where two plates of the most perfect looking food lay waiting. Bella smiled and mouthed her thanks to Esme, who smiled beautifully in return. It seemed to be some sort of Italian dinner, with thick red sauce and the welcome scent of cooked eggplants.

"It's eggplant parmigiana." Carlise said proudly. "Esme just loves any excuse to cook, so don't be shy about taking seconds if you want it."

"Alright, thank you Esme." Kiera smiled slightly and sat down, taking a moment to breathe in the heavenly scent.

It was a bit awkward being at a table full of people who didn't eat, and for that, Kiera was thankful for Bella's humanity. It gave her a chance to ignore the eyes of the Cullens as she ate. Carlisle began talking about the treaty, one that Kiera had already learned about from the mouth of Jacob himself. It was endearing to know they had lived for so long, in a strange sort of way. Almost a kindred feeling.

Ramona must have felt the same since she'd relaxed upon sitting down. She opened up some of her own experiences with immortality, chuckling at memories of the early eighteen-hundreds and the ridiculous clothing she'd seen go into fashion. Of course, it had to come to an end.

"If you're immortal, then why is it Kiera has a heartbeat?" Rosalie asked, a deep frown on her perfect face.

Kiera froze mid-bite. Carefully, she set down her fork and pushed her food off to the side, appetite gone. She rose from the table, mumbled a quiet thank you to Esme once more and let Ramona explain everything she'd wanted to avoid. Rosalie's expression turned regretful and Kiera had to shake her head as Jasper got to his feet.

"I'll be fine. I just want a breather." Kiera gave the room an absent smile, already making her way towards the front of the house.

The chilly air greeted her and Kiera sucked it in greedily. Outside it was blessedly silent, with only the swaying of the leaves to accompany Kiera. She strained but couldn't hear a single word from inside the house and smiled to herself, thankful for the silence. The door opened and Kiera held back a groan, turning to see Edward's amused face.

"Sorry, sorry. Just wanted a moment to speak with you." He closed the door behind him softly, coming to stand next to her beneath the porch light.

Kiera turned away from him, gazing out into the dark night. The woods around the house seemed more sinister at night, more dangerous. She surpassed a shiver at the thought and saw Edward watching her.

"Are you cold? I can get you a thicker jacket." Edward had already opened the door when a hand shot out, handing him a thick dark jacket. Edward snorted and took it, thanking whoever gave it to him too quietly for her to hear.

Kiera took the jacket from him, giving him her silent thanks. She wasn't any colder than usual, slowly getting acclimated to a lower body temperature, but it felt moot to argue with him. If he was Bella's boyfriend, he must be just as stubborn as she is. Snuggling into it, she breathed in the scent of blackberries and cedar, half-convinced she could taste the underlying hint of rainwater.

"I wish to thank you." Edward started. "Thank you for being here for her when I wasn't."

His guilt was something Kiera saw no use for. It was already dead and done, and the damage would last even without his guilt. She mulled over his words, eyes gazing at the shadowed woods before them.

"I can never repay you for what you've done for me. If something had happened to her, I don't-" Edward stopped, voice rough.

"Something already has happened to her. You happened to her, Edward. She was a zombie when we first met. So empty, so lifeless. When you left, you took Bella with you." Kiera said slowly. "'_And in the taste confounds the appetite: Therefore love moderately'_."

Edward stilled, face ashen with shame and a backbreaking amount of guilt. "I know. But I'm too selfish to live without her again."

"That's the point. You can't live without her, and she can't live without you. You've both made that abundantly clear. You loved her so much yet you still hurt her. I understand you probably had the best of intentions, but love isn't safe even if one half of the equation is gone. Whoever is left behind is also left with the torment. If you are going to gamble, Edward, don't give up halfway through the game."

Seb's smile, his gentle hand in hers- love had almost been in her grasp and it had almost killed her. Even in his death, she can't escape him. Does love always end in pain, or were she and Edward prime examples of what can go wrong?

"She won't survive it again." Kiera said. "And if it's because of you again, neither will you. I'd make sure of it."

Kiera's promise didn't deter Edward, it seemed. He surprised her by laughing.

"No, don't worry, I'm not laughing at you. I just rather appreciate your love for her. That is something I can understand." He chuckled. "But in all seriousness, I'm forever in your debt."

"Hmm. Don't know if I like that." Kiera muttered.

Emmett's booming laugh from inside the house made her crack, her own light laughter tumbling from her lips. "Do they always eavesdrop?" She teased. "Must make it hard for you to put the moves on Bells."

If Edward could flush, he would probably be as red as his hair by now. "It's alright, she can't hear us."

"But as you just pointed out, my entire family and your cousin can." Edward frowned.

"Ramona couldn't care less about this conversation," Kiera said offhandedly. "It's your family you should be more worried about."

"I'm going back inside." He mumbled, fumbling with the door. Kiera had never seen a supernatural creature fumble with a simple doorknob before. Her full-blown, doubled over laughter followed Edward inside, causing him to lift his shoulders to his ears.

In the minuscule moment the door was open, Kiera could hear her cousin's laughter joining Emmetts. It was the first time in a while she'd heard Ramona laugh that hard, and Kiera couldn't help but soak in it. With the laughter of her cousin and the cool air on her flushed skin, Kiera leaned her head back, closed her eyes, and dared to hope.

* * *

Ramona sat in the attic, her dust-covered pants the last thing in her mind as she stared at an old wooden chest.

It was the one and only thing holding any remnants of her aunt. When Marisol had left them both behind, she'd taken everything with her but her wooden chest of secrets. As if it were sentient and would strike out at her at any moment, Ramona was slow to reach out to it, her hand quaking. But it did not stir and it did not bite as she opened it.

Plumes of dust burst into the air, and if her lungs still worked, she would have choked on it. It only served as a mild annoyance as she wiped it out of her eyes and began her search. Old and forgotten camera pieces lay broken in the box, the ripped tarp tugging at Ramona's heart. Kiera had loved this camera, and it lay here broken. She moved it carefully aside.

Stray bits and bobs were strewn about the box, along with a long white dress that made Ramona roll her eyes. It was strangely immaculate and untouched by the hands of time. She didn't bother to look at it further- the sight alone disgusted her. She had almost given up hope when her hand brushed against the dress's delicate beading, revealing a bump.

Beneath the dress was a thick envelope. The paper had gone yellow and the once-proud blue ribbon wrapping around it was now limp and dull. On the cover was the familiar scrawl that Marisol so hated.

'_Kiera.'_

**AN:Hey everybody! I hope everyone is staying safe in these wild times. Be sure to stay inside and keep those hands clean! I hope you enjoyed this chapter, it's the longest one I've written yet. You're more than welcome to share your thoughts ^_^**


	8. Sweater Weather

The sun had finally decided to grace Forks with its presence. Though partially hidden by the thick gloomy clouds, it peeked through and shone warmly in the morning sky. Kiera sat on the porch with her head tilted back, throat exposed and swan-like as she greedily soaked in the sun. Mariah Carey played on the old dusty radio Kiera had pulled out from the hall closet, lamenting about how foolish she’d been to let her lover go.

Kiera rolled her eyes and switched channels, the janky dial threatening to fall apart under her touch. She could admit the human was a powerhouse of a singer, but love songs had always left a sour taste in her mouth ever since Seb. Kiera checked her phone and wondered where Bella was.

They’d decided Bella was going to drive her to school now that she’s getting sicker. It’d been hard to admit she’d needed the help, but Kiera’s pride could shove it. Bella was adamant about driving her, and rather than waste energy fighting her on it, Kiera simply gave in and agreed. She snuggled deeper into the jacket she wore, once again breathing in that comforting mix of cedar and blackberries, marveling at how quickly she’d gotten used to the smell.

She’d have to thank whatever Cullen lent her this jacket. Surely it’d make it easier to be around the coven and their cloying scents after having pretty much huffing such an intoxicating scent. Unlike the rest of the Cullens, this scent wasn’t overwhelmingly sweet. It didn’t leave her feeling like she’d gotten a mouthful of perfume, at least. 

A cramp in her lower abdomen crackled through her, and Kiera grit her teeth. When she’d woken up this morning to relieve herself, she’d been dismayed at the sight of her arch-nemesis- her period. She’d hoped it would have already died off by now, but the damned thing came back like a stray fed one too many times. Another cramp sent her phone groaning in protest in her grasp. 

Kiera gaped, the small device dented with perfect fingerprints. Ramona was going to kill her for that. Her cousin made sure Kiera knew that her phone was in mint condition, and that everything else Ramona owned was handled with extreme caution and care. It was something Ramona was proud about and had tried to instill in Kiera.

Kiera kind of wished she’d listened more.

Bella’s old behemoth of a truck came chugging along into her driveway, the new tires crunching the gravel beneath it. Kiera raised an eyebrow at the sight of them and Bella rolled her eyes.

“Rosalie insisted. She hates my car. The tires were the last straw for her and she refused to let me go home yesterday until I let her put them on.” Bella said.

“That’s progress, isn’t it?” Kiera grunted as she got up, hand resting on her lower stomach.

“Cramps?” Bella asked with sympathy. “Not really. She didn’t care less until I said I was going to start picking you up from now on.”

“Maybe she doesn’t want you to embarrass yourself further.” Kiera teased, easing into the car. “And yeah. Ramona thinks it’s the last one at least. It’s just going to be a monster to deal with.”

“Do I need to warn the Cullens?” Bella’s brows knitted and she bit her lip.

“Why would you?” Kiera hesitated to ask but she forced the words out anyway. “It’s just a period.”

Back in her time, periods weren’t spoken of. They were taboo, considered nasty unless talking about it with someone as relaxed as Ramona. Even her mother had been scornful about the ‘blessing’ that came once a month. And despite Kiera wishing she was as modern as Bella, her cheeks threatened to flush with embarrassment. 

“It’s just, Jasper seemed so...intense when you met him.” Bella said. 

“I thought you said you believed in him.” Kiera frowned. “Why the change of heart?”

“I do believe in him!” Bella rushed in. “I also have seen how fast they move. With the way you are now, I don’t like the chances if it came down to a fight.”

“I could always fry him if he gets too close.” Kiera said with a forced shrug. “Anyways, how did math homework go last night?”

Bella simply groans before starting her rant. Kiera could agree, while the math wasn’t overly complicated, it was a time suck that she didn’t enjoy. Kiera was simply lucky Ramona had taught her everything she knew; or she would have sat up all night with those math problems, pencil in hand, and half of her hair in the other. It didn’t help that their teacher had a meek and mild voice, his whispering words so hard for the rest of the room to hear. 

If Kiera were anyone else, her ire at his mousey nature would have left her steamrolling him into just giving out the answers. But it was important to practice her patience. As the volatile anger that grew as she died brewed in her veins, Kiera was struck with random cravings for carnage. Her class time was now spent daydreaming about various ways she could take a person apart and get away with it. A shudder ran down her spine, and Kiera swallowed the saliva that gathered in her mouth.

Bella glanced at Kiera out of the corner of her eye. A frown worked its way onto her face, knowing her friend was locked in a mental conversation against herself. She took the image of her friend in, grateful for the backroads she preferred to take. Kiera’s brown eyes were dull and bloodshot, and a permanent scowl seemed to have settled on her chapped lips. Dark crescent moons rested beneath her tired eyes, and her normally lush hair had been pulled into a sloppy bun.

She was still wearing Jasper’s jacket, and Bella could bet she’d been sleeping in it. It threatened to swallow Kiera whole, her thin frame swamped in the thick fabric. Bella wasn’t privy to whatever was going on there, Edward’s insistence to keep the information within the coven becoming a constant battle between them. It didn’t help that every time Bella had thought she’d finally worn him down, his phone would ring and Alice would be there to tell him to shut it.

Bella could only guess why they’d let Kiera take his jacket. Maybe it was helping with her scent, or maybe Jasper’s southern gentleman ways had taken over that night. She could at least be thankful for the minimal comfort it was bringing Kiera.

“You look like shit.” Bella whispered, pulling into her usual parking space.

“Thanks, Bells.” Kiera said sarcastically, running a hand over her exhausted face.

“Would you rather I lie to you?” Bella asked, leaning back against her seat. “You were looking better for a few days, what happened?”

“It ebbs and flows,” Kiera shrugged. “It’ll become my new normal and everything will settle down. The adjustment period is the worst part.”

“Worse than dying?” Bella bit her lip, incredulous.

It surprised her to see Kiera laugh. “Dying is the easy part, I’m afraid. Diwata deteriorate, get used to it, deteriorate some more, then we go to sleep and wake up immortal. I’m just about over the first hurdle. “

“And I thought to become a vampire was brutal.” Bella shook her hair, her chocolate locks swaying.

The girls grabbed their things and climbed out of the truck, slowly making their way to their class. Kiera didn’t particularly want to do math this early in the morning and by Bella’s face, she didn’t either. They sombered as they got closer to the door, both of them dreading the next two hours.

“Still no Edward, huh?” Kiera asked quietly, taking her seat next to Bella.

Bella only shook her head. “They won’t be taking any classes this time around. I doubt most of the town knows they are back. Besides Carlisle and Esme, the story is they are still at their universities.”

“I still find it insane that they keep going to school over and over.” Kiera winced at the mere idea of it all.

“When you have eternity, you find yourself pressed to find things to fill the time.” Bella shrugged, pulling out her thick book of headaches.

“Did they want their jacket back by the way?” Kiera carefully arranged her pencils, only looking at Bella when each one was perfectly in place.

“You can keep it.” Bella said, turning silent as their professor walked into the room.

Kiera shrugged. She needed it more than they did, she guessed. Plus, they could always buy a new one. 

* * *

Lauren was waiting for them in their usual spot on the quad, checking her watch with a pinched expression. Her schedule was packed back to back, but she’d made sure to try her best to line up their lunchtimes. Getting ready for law school was taking up all of Lauren’s time, but if anyone could do it, it was her. The second Kiera stepped into the room, Lauren’s head whipped up and her nose wrinkled as if she smelt something foul.

“What are you wearing?” She asked with disdain. 

“Clothes, Lauren.” Kiera answered dryly, rolling her bloodshot eyes. “When did you cut your hair?”

Lauren’s normally long flaxen hair was cropped short in a bob, the front of her bangs stained a bubblegum pink. Lauren didn’t need any encouragement to talk about herself, launching into the riveting tale of her and Jessica’s adventure to the local salon. It made it easy for Kiera to check out and wonder when her next nap would be. Her lunch was a sad pile of wilting leaves, courtesy of the cafeteria. It only made her long for Esme’s cooking.

“I miss Esme’s food already.” Kiera grumbled. Bella huffed a laugh, covering it with a cough when Lauren stopped her story to send them both a nasty glare.

It was only the arrival of Angela and Jessica that saved them from Lauren’s ire at being interrupted. Everything was fine, Kiera even felt happy, until Mike showed up. He was sweating and paler than normal, his eyes rimmed red and shot. Kiera eyed him warily before turning back to the girls, shrugging when Angela raised a brow at Mike’s appearance.

He seemed drained, every step taken more of dragging of feet. Kiera decided whatever was up with him; he could keep it to himself. She had enough on her plate already and she definitely didn’t need any more problems. Mike sat off the side of the group, his usual chattiness replaced with sullen glances and a bad attitude. Everybody seemed stiffer with him around, his erratic behavior growing on Kiera’s nerves. 

But Kiera kept her mouth shut. If she opened it, would rows of teeth appear, potentially scaring off their human friends in such a public area? Kiera couldn’t chance that. Lauren already took forever to warm up to, and even longer for her to warm up to Kiera. Erasing all that hard work in one fell swoop was not what Kiera planned to do with her day.

It was easy to ignore Mike when Bella started talking low to Kiera about her weird dreams. Dreams about wolves, about her Cullens, about things to come that always come true. 

“Maybe you're psychic.” Jessica joked.

Neither had realized that she’d been listening in, and they sent each other an alarmed glance. Just how much had Jessica heard? Did they really mess up that badly? Kiera could feel her stomach start to roll. Any color in Bella’s face leached the more Jessica stayed silent.

Jessica finally broke. ‘What? It’s not that weird to dream about vampires, trust me, I’ve had weirder dreams. Like when Willy Wonka came to turn my family into candy canes and then he got really big and chomped down on them, and all I could do was listen to them scream, and-”

“Oh my God, not that dream again.” Lauren commented with a groan. “I hate that fucking dream.”

“You hate that dream? Try having to dream it whenever exam week comes up.” Jessica shuddered. 

Kiera relaxed, leaning into Bella’s shoulder with her own. She could feel her friend loosen her own coiled muscles, the tension bleeding from Bella’s stiff shoulders. That’d been too close. Kiera knows better, knows not to talk about this kind of stuff so specifically in public. But around Bella, Kiera forgets the rest of the world wasn’t ‘in the know’ as Bella would say.

Bella must have felt the same because she still was looking quite pale. Kiera could pat Bella’s cheek, put on a show for their human friends and pretend that it was all just a dream. But she couldn’t help thinking about Lauren’s words. Though Bella was clearly not psychic in the way Alice was, her dreams did have a strange habit of coming true.

Was it just her human brain processing what she couldn’t normally see?

Or was it something more?

* * *

A week later and Kiera finds herself driving down to the reservation. She couldn’t sleep, couldn’t think of anything but the blistering heat of the wolve’s skin. She craved it, desperation to feel warm again propelling her through the streets despite her and Ramona’s agreement. Bella could drive her around any other time, but right now, she needed to see the wolves.

It was a need that overrode any rational thought. She can’t stop shivering in the coach of her car, even as the heat-blasted on high through her car vents. Kiera couldn’t process her wind chafed hands, couldn’t feel anything but the chattering of her teeth and her constant shaking. A glance in the rearview mirror revealed her lips were tinted blue, and Kiera bit back a frustrated cry.

How envious she felt of the wolves and their warmth. It wasn’t very fair, not in her eyes. They got to turn into giant animals and run through the forest all day, and they belonged to a big family that could never let them down. Emily’s face flashed through her mind, and she immediately regretted her thoughts. Any sense of envy slithered down the drain, leaving behind a foul taste in her mouth. Emily was proof that the wolves weren’t as lucky as it seemed.

Whatever had happened to Emily, however, it had happened, there was no doubt in her mind it was caused by another wolf. How could Emily stand to look any of them in the eyes, after that? How could she stand to still love Sam?

Kiera shuddered. She couldn’t fathom staying around someone who’d hurt her so badly. But Emily’s eyes, so dark and so full of love for Sam, for her pack- it was clear she stayed willingly. Is that what love did for you? Warp things so much that you end up a frog in a slowly boiling pot of water? Kiera didn’t want to sound so bitter, to seem so jaded. She swallowed down the foulness in hopes to make room for tastier thoughts.

Before Kiera knew it she was parked in front of Sam and Emily’s quaint home. Wildflowers circled the home and creeping vines trailed up the sides of the house. Just to the left was a home garden, surprisingly Kiera with its abundance. With the sun setting and casting the last of its light gently across the fairy tale-esque home, Kiera could almost imagine living there. The screen door swung open, and a few of the wolves came tumbling out, surrounding the car with jostles and snorting laughs.

“Missed us that badly huh?” Embry smiled, his eyes turning to crescents from cheeks that still haven’t shed their baby fat. He looked so young, so boyish, Kiera could see him as someone’s younger brother.

The boy who spoke next was the smallest of them all, still scrawny and voice lost to the throes of puberty. It cracked as he spoke, his puppy brown eyes going wide with excitement. Kiera doesn’t remember his name, or if she’d met him before, but he looked terribly small amongst his brothers.

Jared was the last one there. Jared stood next to Seth, towering over the boy, eyes glued to his phone like he was waiting for the most important call of his life. The second he got it, he bounded out into the woods, no doubt for some privacy. Kiera quirked a brow, wondering if he was doing alright.

“His girlfriend called.” Embry said with a sigh. “If Kim calls, Jared goes running.”

“Are you here for Emily’s cooking too?” Seth asked eagerly. “She’s a great cook, I don’t blame you!”

“Seth, Embry, quit annoying our guest before she even gets out of the car.” Emily scolded, stepping down lightly from her porch steps. Her beautifully tragic face warmed at the sight of Kiera, and she waved at her with the affection of a mother. 

“Kiera! Come on in, I’m glad to see you!” Emily said.

Kiera was shaking as she got out of her car, smiling as Seth crowded close to catch her if she fell. She felt embarrassment creep up the back of her neck. How incredibly rude of her to just invite herself over, and on a pack night too. She voiced her apology to Emily, who simply shook her head.

“Sam spoke the truth, your kind are always welcome here. Any protectors of the earth will always have a place at our table. Besides, you’re a friend of Jacob. That makes you a friend of the pack too.” Emily wrapped an arm around Kiera, squeezing her shoulder.

“The more the merrier.” Seth chirped, almost tumbling over his feet as he and Embry rushed into the house. 

The table was set for what looked like an army. Emily and Sam’s grocery bills must be ridiculous with all the food they have to buy. Noticing Kiera’s wide eyes, Emily smiles and nods to a thick binder, bits and pieces of brightly colored advertisements sticking out randomly.

“Coupons. The entire reservation usually pitches in, but the pack just keeps getting bigger. You really have no idea how much food these guys eat. They could eat a carton of eggs for breakfast each and still be hungry.”

“Phasing is an energy zapper,” Embry said, mouth full of food. “I doubt even the Cullens with their nice cars could keep us this well-fed. Emily and Sam spend every Sunday morning cutting and arranging coupons.”

Kiera just nodded, not wanting to voice her disagreement on Embry’s statement. The Cullens could for sure keep the pack fed. In fact, they could probably keep ten packs fed. Her mind conjured up the image of Cullen's full fridge, something they definitely didn’t need and cringed.

“Between medical bills and our school expenses, it can get pretty tight around here,” Emily admitted. “But nothing we can’t handle, right boys?”

“Right!” They said in tandem. Being around the pack was like being in a room full of twins, sometimes they said things at the same time. It was both funny and really, really creepy.

But so is a cute girl having a mouth full of needles.

Dinner was a feast of all kinds of meats. Chicken, beef, and even some fish Kiera didn’t doubt was caught earlier today were laid out. The amount of colorful vegetables could make up most of the rainbow, from leafy greens to deep rust and purples. Fresh from the garden and straight to the table, the heavenly aroma of quality vegetables made Kiera’s mouth water . With a wolf as her fiance and a garden of perfection, Emily was living her best Disney princess life.

“Save some for your siblings, boys.” Emily warned, spooning a mound of mashed potatoes onto Kiera’s plate. 

Kiera eyed them as they shoveled food into their mouths. They eat like most young boys, big forkfuls of food that they can barely chew. It was oddly adorable, especially the way Seth’s eyes would light up with every bite he took. The rest of the pack must be running late since Emily hadn’t bothered waiting to dig into her own meal. Kiera could weep with how full she felt by the end of it, never one to turn away free food even as Emily repeatedly kept filling up her plate.

Just being near the young wolves had Kiera feeling warmer. They were their own space heaters, filling up the area with a generous warmth that coaxed the cold right out of her. Like a cat in a patch of sun, Kiera stretched lazily from the sensation. She couldn’t help the yawn that escaped her, easing into her seat with a bonelessness she hasn’t felt since she was engaged.

On the screen was some trashy reality show Kiera couldn’t conjure up the name of. Normally, Kiera couldn’t stand these kinds of shows. But some of the things said and done in this program were the most insane, funny things Kiera’s seen on tv. Fighting for the affections of a man wearing a giant ugly clock around his neck was probably at the top of the list, if Kiera were honest. Like the total time suck it was, Kiera found her eyes glued to the screen, only the upper half portion of her face left to peek out from the numerous blankets Emily had supplied her with.

The sound of thudding footsteps and loud laughing voices sounded an entire world away, the television set having Kiera’s total attention. She barely registers Paul’s rough timbre drifting from the kitchen, slowly getting closer, surely coming to see what the girls were laughing about. Kiera turned to look at him, smiling as he carried two plates, both stacked as high as possible with food. 

“Flavor of Love? Really?” He teased. Kiera looked back to the screen and shrugged, scooching over to make room for the burly man. 

“What, you missed me that much you just had to come and see me, didn’t you?” Paul smirked, taking a seat next to her, being careful not to drop his plates of food. “Don’t blame you. I’m pretty great.”

Kiera could feel his heat before he fully settled into the couch, shivering and biting back a groan of appreciation. It felt like stumbling into a sun soaked room, a feeling that eased into your bones and curled your toes. Kiera said nothing, content to soak in his warmth and steal glances at him out of the corner of her eyes.

His beauty was different from Jaspers, or even Edwards, Kiera thought absently. The Cullens walked with a languid grace that was all predator, their lion gold eyes always watching and seeing through you. The vampires were all a dream, too beautiful to be real. Paul felt solid. Real. 

Human, in a way Kiera wasn’t. Kiera could see Bella’s draw to the pack, they were a sense of normalcy amongst the chaotic supernatural world. 

Even if they did turn into giant wolves.

The credits were rolling and Paul was coming back into the living room with his fourth plate of food when Kiera made the absolute worst decision of her life. She’d gotten up from the couch to relieve herself, standing tall and reaching for the ceiling in a well-deserved stretch when she finally turned to Paul to acknowledge his presence. Kiera had been too preoccupied the last time she was here to look any of the wolves in the eyes, wholly unaware of the bullshit curse they had going for them.

Locking eyes with Paul was like taking a sucker-punch to the gut and then being plunged into the deepest, darkest part of the ocean. Dark lashes framed even darker eyes, which were wide and in shock. Paul was an island and Kiera was lost at sea, forced to break the surface and head to the only land that was him for miles. She felt like she was scrambling onto shore only for a giant bear trap to sink its metal teeth around her middle and grip her onto the land.

Paul’s plates fell to the ground. The rushing of her blood was all that she could hear. When did it become so silent? Was it always this silent? Where did everyone go, why would they leave her alone on this island? Breathing became hard and Kiera took a step back, wanting to be anywhere but here.

Paul sees it and starts to shake, a sad twist to his handsome face that Kiera feels like she has to make go away. With the force of a magnet, Kiera and Paul step towards each other in time to a beat only they seem to be able to hear. Kiera wonders if the drumming she hears is her heart. She decides she doesn’t want the answer.

“What the hell?” Kiera whispers, voice trembling.

“Let me explain.” Paul says through gritted teeth.

“Start talking,  _ now _ .” 

* * *

He’s taller than Embry and Seth but not as tall as Jacob, Kiera decides. Though not the biggest of the wolf pack, Paul was stupidly shredded and also very, very aware of it. His mouth quirks as he notices her noticing him, and the silence around them wouldn’t feel so suffocating if he actually shared what  _ the hell was going on _ .

“Sooo...what have you heard of imprinting?” Paul starts, scratching the back of his neck. His thick raven hair is pulled into a man bun that shouldn’t be attractive, but is. She notices his ear is pierced, the silver stud dimly shining in under the orange porch light.

The two had been shooed out of the living room by Emily, who had the face of someone witnessing the birth of Jesus Christ himself. Tears of wonder had prickled at her eyes, and Kiera had to force her jello legs to take step after step into the kitchen and out to the front to avoid screaming at her.

“Absolutely nothing. Do I even want to know? I don’t think I want to know. How about we ignore this?” Kiera asked, tugging sharply at the end of her braid.

The split second of pain wasn’t enough to erase the moment, nor enough to distract Paul from continuing on. He only scowls and grabs her hand, forcing it into a fist at her side. 

“Stop that.” He said. “Imprinting is when a wolf finds their perfect match. It’s like a soulmate, I guess you could say.”

“Is there any way to take it back?” Kiera blurts, unashamed. She’s a coyote locked in a trap, ready to chew her own leg off if it means getting out of this mess.

Paul sighs, the sound of it rough around the edges. Kiera’s vision blurs as tears begin to spill down her cheek, and his hands are suddenly cradling her face and they are eye to eye. It was too intimate, too familiar for Kiera. She evaded his grasp and shook her head.

“Don’t do that.” She said.

“Hey, hey, shh, it’s alright Needles. This doesn’t have to be anything, okay? It can be whatever we want it to be.” Paul assures firmly, not once wavering. “All it means is we are bound. Think of it as a built-in best friend.”

“So I don’t have to marry you?” Kiera sniffles, lip wobbling. She’s a child all over again, small and scared and wondering where the fuck her mother is. 

Paul’s bark of a laugh startles Kiera from her tears, and she can feel it in her bones that everything is going to be alright. 

“Fuck no! We don’t have to do anything like that. This can be platonic. Imprinting is whatever is needed. Need a protector? You’ve got one. A friend? You’ve got that too. A totally hot make out buddy who will hold your hand in the dark? Well, if you insist.” Paul’s cheeky grin was a balm to the stress Kiera was feeling, smoothing chaos swarming like an angry hornets nest in her chest.

“You know I’m going to be immortal, right?” Kiera croaked.

Paul was silent for a few moments. “Well,” He said. “Then you’ll have me for a very, very long time. As long as I keep shifting, I won’t age. I won’t ever get sick. For as long as you need me, I’ll be around.”

“Whoever said I need you?” Kiera demands, wiping at the stubborn tear that slipped out. “This isn’t what I asked for, this isn’t what I wanted at all.”

“I didn’t ask for this either.” Paul said bluntly. “I wanted to keep some control of my life. Do you think I asked to be a shapeshifter? To imprint on a random immortal girl who is literally crying about being tied to me for life? Nah. I didn’t ask for any of this shit.”

“Hey-” Kiera tried to step in, frowning.

“But,” He continued over her. “You get tired of being mad. You get tired of being tired. Sam’s life is proof of that. You think any of us want this weird ‘gift’? Sam sure didn’t want it, but he got it. And look at them now, happier than shit.”

“That’s why they love each other? Because some bond is forcing them to?” Kiera spat. “You do realize how messed up that sounds, don’t you?”

“Imprinting isn’t always like that. It just means you are bound together. That that person will always take the top spot in your heart. But some things are just meant to be, and they were just meant to fall in love, regardless of what they thought they wanted. The bond knows, Kiera. It’s not gonna jerk us around.”

“It already has. “ Kiera sighed. “I can feel your presence already. It’s like it’s always been there.”

“I can feel you too.” Paul admits, rubbing at his forehead. “It’s warm. It’s nice.”

He was right. It was warm, and it was nice. But it was also terrifying. Kiera didn’t want romance, she didn’t want to kiss Paul or hold his hand. Would she grow to love him, like Sam did Emily? Was she doomed to this, to be a wolf girl like Emily?

“Diwata already have something like this.” Kiera bites her lip, jolting when she tastes copper.

“Careful there, Needles.” Paul mutters, raising a hand as if to help. Kiera’s gives him a swift look and his hand lowers, not without a roll of the eyes from him.

“It’s like you are calling me the supernatural equivalent to brace-face.” Kiera uses the back of her hand to rub away the blood, tongue flickering out to catch a small twinge of the metallic liquid.

“Or metal mouth.” Paul nods, smirking. “What did you mean Diwata have something like this?”

“Diwata also have soulmates, just not like this. When a Diwata meets them, it’s a comfort. It’s like coming home.” Kiera drew her knees up to her chest, hugging her legs close. “But Diwata can still fall for someone that isn’t their soulmate. My cousin once married a human that wasn’t her soulmate, because she loved him too much to be without him.”

“How do you know if you’ve met your soulmate?” Paul asked. 

“It doesn’t happen right away. It’s a love that will come in time, but you are comfortable with that person. They are a safe haven for you. But unlike your imprinting, it is always romantic. When you meet them, no other person will ever compare.” Kiera sighed. 

“Sounds just as intense as imprinting.” Paul muttered. 

“How are you so calm about this?” Kiera looked at him under her heavy lashes. She was raw, exposed, like she’d been cut in half and open for him to peer into. What was he seeing when he looked at her? The edges Seb left behind that were freely bleeding all over the place, all the time? Or just her sickly expression?

Paul only shrugged. “I think you need me to be calm. I’ll probably have my own freak out about it later.”

“I’m not ready for a romantic relationship.” Kiera whispered. Seb’s smiling face taunted her even now, his hyena laughter echoing in her ears. Kiera didn’t think she’d ever be ready for another romantic relationship.

She wondered if he’d cut that out of her, too.

“I don’t think I'm even cut out for that kind of thing.” Paul said, stretching out his long legs, his gaze on his hands. “I’m still working out the whole shapeshifter deal. I never thought this would happen- it’s supposed to be rare. Of course it happened to the one with anger issues.”

“You don’t seem like an angry guy.” Kiera’s brown eyes narrowed, assessing his words. 

“Wait till you get to know me.” Paul smirked, a bitter tinge to his words. 

* * *

Jacob’s reaction to Paul imprinting was decidedly terrifying. Unable to hold his shape together, he’d bursted into a giant wolf, his rusty brown fur standing on end. He’d only just arrived a few minutes ago, and taking one look at Paul’s face, he seemed to have guessed what had taken place. Leah, who had been his patrol partner, stood off scowling to the side as if she were equally as angry. The commotion had brought out the rest of the pack, with Sam at the helm, stalking towards Jacob with a thunderous look on his face.

“Jacob, control yourself!” Sam ordered.

The mammoth that was Jacob only shook his heavy head, a low growl vibrating in his chest. Paul was standing in front of Kiera, his own snarl working it’s way out his mouth.

“What’s your damage, Black?” Paul snapped. “She’s not you're precious Bella, why are you so fucking pissy over this?”

“He’s jealous.” Leah ground out, speaking like it pained her. “He’d been hoping he would imprint on Bella. Out of everyone, it had to be you.”

“Leah, don’t start please.” Sam’s voice was a touch gentler with Leah than it had been with Jacob, but the tone of authority was still there. 

“I’m just saying what the rest of us are thinking! Out of everyone, how come it was Paul?” Her voice cracked angrily. “You and Jared, now Paul? I thought you said this was rare, Sam!”

“It is rare Leah!” Sam looked desperately at her. 

Leah only cried out in anger before jumping away, a gray wolf taking her place mid air. Even angry, Leah was in a league of her own in terms of beauty. Shifting from human to wolf with an ease Kiera couldn’t help but admire, she watched the heart broken wolf speed off, the leaves shaking in her wake. 

With both now gone, their grief was left hanging in the air behind them. If the earth could open up and swallow Kiera whole, that’d be great. A glance at the window revealed a quickly drawn curtain, Emily’s regretful face vanishing from sight. Sam could only stare after his two packmates, his mouth agape. He muttered to himself angrily and bolted after them.

It was clear Jacob and Leah were hurting. Jacob in his love for Bella, a love that would never be returned being shoved in his face by someone he clearly had issues with. And Leah...Kiera shifted uneasily, remembering the rage in Leah’s eyes when they first met. Whatever Leah was going through, it’d left her torn and furious. It was a feeling Kiera could understand all too well.

But the night had already been full of revelations, and Kiera shook off the idea of chasing after them with the hope to talk it out. Kiera didn’t want to involve herself in any more misery tonight. 

“So…” Kiera drawled. “I’m going to go home now.”

“Good idea.” Paul scowled, still gazing after his pack. “Wait, let me give you my number.”

“Uh, my phone is kind of broken right now.” Kiera kicked a pebble, pursing her lips in embarrassment. “I kind of crushed it earlier.”

“Hmm. Then give me your house phone number.” Paul said without missing a beat. Kiera eyed him, seeing his serious expression. With a sigh, she rattled off her home phone number, watching him slowly put it into his phone. 

As Kiera drove away, she chanced taking a glance into her rearview mirror. Pauls’ figure grew smaller and smaller, but Kiera knew he was watching her drive away, his hands in his pockets.When she was sure she was out of hearing range, she relaxed, face flushing.

“What the hell just happened?”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> decided to explore imprinting some more, and to give the human characters some oomph by messing with their lives lol
> 
> I promise this won't be a love triangle, just some natural thought processing on what imprinting means for them both. 
> 
> also, MIDNIGHT SUN IS COMING ASKDJF ARE YOU GUYS EXCITED?? be sure to donate to the Quileute tribe though!!!


	9. In With the Rain

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> AN: Hey guys, it's been a while! I hope everyone is safe and healthy, and that this chaos gives way for change. We desperately need it. I wrote this chapter a bit longer, to make up for lost time. I hope you guys enjoy! <3

Kiera couldn't sleep. Thoughts about Paul and what it all meant rattled through her skull, taking up precious real estate that Kiera had reserved for her upcoming math exam. The warmth of Paul took its place in Kiera's core, beating in time with her own heart, reminding her she was forever attached to a stranger. It was the most terrifying thing to ever come to fruition.

She frowned, wondering what it all meant. Kiera didn't love him, she'd just met him. And no matter how hard she searched, she didn't find the innate draw that a Diwata mate would have on her. He didn't even feel separate from her anymore. Paul had already wormed his way into her life and made a home in her heart, and she didn't even know his last name.

Dawn was quickly approaching, timid beams of light inched across the earth, the morning fog rolling in behind it. Kiera sat up in her twin-sized mattress, wrapping her comforter around her and staring out the window.

Her life had become a series of segments. A repeated routine that she couldn't break out of. Wake up, go to class, eat lunch, go to class again. Come home, to homework. Sleep. Maybe eat that day if she could stomach it. It'd only been three days since The Incident, as she likes to call it, has happened. Bella had asked what's wrong, had seen the torn look in Kiera's eyes-

How does one explain imprinting?

Did Bella even know about this? Kiera sat up straighter. Did the Cullens? Even if she were around the same age as most of them, they'd been awake longer than she had. Maybe they had an idea of how to break it?

When Bella had called, nervously asking if Kiera wanted to watch the Cullens play baseball, Kiera silently cheered for the excuse to see them again. She slipped on her sneakers, mourning the freeing feeling of being without shoes already. A pair of shoes on a Diwata was like clipping the wings of a bird. It limited movement, shrank access to the warm cradling hands of the soil. Her shoes would keep her from fluttering about, too absorbed in how uncomfortable she was to really relish the moment.

Snagging a baby blue baseball cap from her cousin's room, Kiera paused. Ramona's bed was made like it always was, the corners untouched and the sheets perfectly smooth. Nothing hinted at Ramona having been there last night, even her scent was starting to go stale. Kiera shook her head to clear herself of the concern growing in her gut.

Her cousin was always one to overwork herself. If she'd been away more often this week than she had in the past few years, that wasn't enough to cause concern. Maybe she was simply busy. Maybe she'd found herself a new lover, Kiera mused with a tiny grin.

Ramona could use the stress relief.

* * *

Seeing the Cullens home would never _not_ be a breathtaking experience, it was decided. The home was too pretty in the light of day, almost seeming like an entirely different place from the first time she saw it. Beneath the golden rays, it looked less like a possible murder spot and more like what you'd expect from someone filthy rich.

Kiera glanced at her image in the rearview mirror and shrugged. She'd at least attempted to look humanoid today. Though her thick dark waves were brushed, a rarity to be celebrated really, they'd been trapped under the baseball cap to keep them off her neck. Even with the gloom and doom of Fork's weather, the humidity more than made up for the lack of heat. Along with her stolen sweater and beat-up sneakers, Kiera was fighting back an embarrassed blush.

Her looks had always been a soft spot in general, but her blushing had been a trait she hated most.

She remembers a time her face would seem stained red as if the flush on her skin were stuck there permanently. Reminisces a softer, shyer time when everything she said was heavily monitored and only her thoughts were her own. Kiera pushes past her blush, trying to find a facial gesture that would have her on equal ground with the Cullens. The girl who blushed easily and loved even easier had been killed that day in the forest.

Kiera would make sure she stayed dead.

Alice clapped her hands excitedly as she jumped out of the car, the bright yellow Porsche doing terrible things to Kiera's sensitive eyes. She'd been at the door the second Kiera had opened it, claiming she'd be the one driving. Normally, Kiera would have just smiled and gone with it, but this time she just rolled her eyes. Yeah, she was dying. People needed to stop making a big deal out of it, it was just a fact of Diwata nature.

She'd tried to make a joke, but it'd come out more passive-aggressive than she'd have liked. "What, you aren't going to carry me inside?"

Alice pointedly ignored her, the smaller woman a constant bout of sunshine to Kiera's ever-growing cloudy attitude.

"You might want to ditch the jacket." Alice smiled, eyes turning into falsely pleasant half-moons. "It might stink up the house."

"Huh?" Kiera said dumbly. "Does it smell that bad? Maybe I should wash it…"

"It just smells like your... friends." Alice chose her words carefully, opening the front door with a flourish and then following Kiera with a graceful spin. She ends with her arms elegantly held aloft, her feet in perfect fifth position as if she'd just danced to music only she could hear.

While an odd one, Alice did have the kind of gazelle-like grace any prima ballerina would turn green over.

Kiera only shook her head with a wry smile, snuggling into the jacket. "Not a chance. And I'm sure you smell just as pungent to them as they do to you. You all still smell a bit too much like a flower shop, if I'm being honest. It's not the easiest on the nose."

Alice only shrugged. "That's fair enough."

"It'll get easier the more I hang around. I'm not used to these growing senses." Kiera stumbled as Alice suddenly latched herself onto her, the small vampire gripping Kiera tightly.

It was only after Alice pulled away and beamed brighter than she had any right to be, that Kiera realized she's basically promised Alice more time together in the future. If it didn't make her so reluctantly warm at the thought, Kiera would have scowled and explained her words away.

Part of her begged to stop heading down this road, warning bells already ringing and singing out Paul's name. It wasn't just another person to get close to, to learn to love and adore, it was someone who could end her life when they decided they were unhappy with her. The very real fear of befriending creatures who would kill you with a snap of their jaws was something Kiera had never particularly entertained, having never thought she'd end up here.

But meeting Bella had imploded her world. Chaos and creatures she'd spent most of her life avoiding were demanding a piece of her, and Kiera couldn't shove away the sharp hissing pain in her slow beating heart. It'd been Ramona and her for so long, Kiera wasn't even sure if she had enough room for more than Bella at this moment.

Their human friends weren't much more than acquaintances. People who would be dead and gone before Kiera could really blink. A thought tugged at the corner of her mind and Kiera rightfully kicked it to the side. Bella was going to be a vampire someday. If Edward were still stupid enough to deny both himself and Bella's desire for eternity- Kiera would have to hit him with a few bolts till he came to his senses.

"There, there," Kiera muttered, awkwardly patting Alice's artfully spiked raven hair. Was her hair naturally just that easy to manage, or did it take a while to learn how to style it? Maybe it was just a vampire thing.

Alice's answering giggle brought a smile to Kiera's face, and she allowed Alice to pull her along by the hand to where the family was once again waiting in the living room. Kiera gave a sheepish wave, knowing they must have heard her words. Esme and Carlisle were as wholesome looking as ever, their hands collapsed tightly as if they couldn't bear to let go.

"Welcome back, Kiera." Esme said softly, only releasing Carlise's hand long enough to rope Kiera in her strong arms.

Kiera could forgive Esme for then passing her around like a well-loved family pet, getting hugs or pats from the present family members. But she couldn't ignore the weird sniffing thing they were doing. More than once, golden eyes glanced over her as they took in her scent, narrowing at what they found.

"So you really are hanging with the wolves." Rosalie scowled. "It's faint, but I can still smell them on you."

Kiera shrugged, nervously trying to ignore the bubbling stream of words forming in her throat. She'd share the imprinting tidbit whenever Bella came, having noticed her brunette's friend's absence along with her bronze haired boyfriend. He must have gone to pick her up.

"Yeah, I'll probably be seeing them a lot more now." Kiera's gaze flickered across Rosalie's modelesque features, frowning at her upturned nose."Have any particular hate for the wolves, Rosalie?"

Rosalie startled before rolling her eyes. "They are just of-"

"Rosalie." Esme warned, an astonishing glint to her tone. "Be nice about Kiera's new friends."

Rosalie shrugged. "I was just going to say they are a bunch of dudebros who smell like a threat. A foul threat."

"There is a woman with them, so while they might resemble a frat, I doubt Leah wants to be grouped with them. And sorry to break it to you, you guys are the ones who smell. They smell like forest to me, like warm earth." Kiera said cooly, lips pursing.

Rosalie looked troubled but bit back whatever she was going to reply with, glancing at Jasper with a cocked eyebrow. Jasper himself seemed to be gritting his teeth, possibly grinding them with a tense jaw. His pale brows were furrowed and threatening to shadow butterscotch eyes, which were locked onto her with the focus of a sniper. His gums must be aching, she thought with a furrowed brow.

He seemed to be holding himself back, though Kiera didn't know why. He'd been one of the ones to give her a pat on the shoulder, his fingers lingering there for what felt like an eternity. Was he holding himself back from snapping her neck and draining her? Or was he just the angriest of the group, because Kiera was getting sick of not knowing what was wrong with him.

"Excuse me for this," Kiera said, folding in on herself. She brought her arms around her waist, fingers gripping tightly onto her jacket. "But what's your damage? You always look at me like I spat in your rabbit or something."

Kiera was just as shocked as the Cullens were at her biting tone. She hated confrontations, used to cry every time she was in one, but she didn't exactly need some southern vampire giving her scathing looks every time she came around. It kind of killed the mood. She watched patiently as Jasper opened and closed his mouth, looking like a stupidly beautiful fish.

"Forgive me." He finally seemed to have found his voice, his hands clenching into tight fists at his side. "That smell on my jacket is rather unpleasant."

Kiera's cheeks colored slightly. It was Jasper's jacket? He was probably upset that she'd kept it so long. And if the wolves really smelt that badly to the Cullens, his jacket being covered in it must be coming off as rude.

"Oh. I didn't think about their smell getting on here. I wouldn't have worn it around them if I had." Kiera shifted uneasily. Where the hell was Bella? "Did you want it back?"

"No," Jasper ground out. "It's yours."

Slightly insulted on behalf of the wolves, of Paul, Kiera simply nodded and kept her mouth shut. With a tiny grimace on her face, Alice stepped into the conversation, sweeping Kiera off to the side with a flurry of questions. Whatever Jasper's issue was, he'd best keep it to himself if he didn't want an angry Ramona breathing down his neck. Alice's exuberant self stepped to block off Jasper, her body a small wall. It did little to ease the unexpected tension building in Kiera's shoulders, the both of them hiking up higher to settle by her ears.

Kiera took a subtle whiff of her newly given jacket, defensive for a pack that wasn't really hers settling in the scowl on her face. Jasper stayed where he stood, watching like he was helpless and couldn't be bothered to move. He's lucky she wasn't Ramona. Ramona would simply give him a look that'd make any man crumble. At least human men. Kiera wasn't sure if it'd work on a vampire, let alone one with as many scars as Jasper had.

The slight shifting of air was the only sign of Edward and Bella's arrival, Bella's face as red as a cherry tomato and a pout on her lips. Edward was his usually smug self, probably proud of being able to make Bella flush like she did. Kiera softened at her friend's evident happiness, regardless of her pouting, and slunk over to drop her head on top of Bella's. The brunette was roughly four inches shorter, a fact that endlessly amused Kiera and annoyed Bella.

"Alright, is everybody ready?" Carlisle called out, his handsome old school Hollywood features fond as he stared out at his family.

"Hell yeah!" Emmett whooped, easily swooping up both Kiera and Bella like footballs under his massive arms. Kiera's heart leaped to her throat when he sped them out a side door that apparently led to the garage, accidentally choking on her spit much to Emmett's joy..

"Language!" Esme chastised him, blowing in like a summer night's breeze.

"Put the girls down, Emmett, they are not pigskins." Carlisle said as he came up behind his wife.

Kiera could barely keep her gasp contained. She was too busy staring at the small sea of incredibly expensive cars to realize the rest of the coven had trickled in, Edward and Alice's having their own weird and nearly silent conversation that left Jasper looking even more sullen. Rosalie saw Kiera's open mouth and sniffed delicately.

"Nice cars." Kiera managed to say, wiggling out of Emmett's grasp. He obviously let her but kept holding Bella like the stumped human child she was. "I like the red one, very nice. Ferrari red?"

Rosalie blinked before nodding reluctantly. "Yes. It's a BMW, and it's mine." The way she spoke shone with the love she held for automobiles. It spoke of endless hours dedicated to tuning it herself, to fixing whatever monstrosities it'd been unfortunately given by human hands.

Kiera recognized the fire in Rosalie's eyes from her time spent with Sebastián. His hand would trail so tenderly across the hood of whatever car he'd come across, uncaring of the eyes that watched him. His expression had been so soft, so content- a younger Kiera had only hoped he'd love her half as much as he loved cars.

Younger Kiera had been an oblivious idiot.

Unwilling to travel down that memory from hell, Kiera focused on keeping her face from showing any of the hurt she held. Something like respect was starting to form behind Rosalie's unwavering gaze. Kiera sent her a wry grin and was silently pleased to note the small smile she'd gotten back.

After bickering back and forth and who was going to take who to the field, it'd been decided Edward was going to of course take Bella out there on his back. She looked queasy at the thought of it and had gulped, making Kiera ponder if she could back out of the baseball game now. She'd been carried by Ramona before, of course, but Ramona actually gave a damn about her and held her head close as she ran so her neck didn't break at the pace.

Kiera doubted the Cullens remembered being human enough to think of that.

And when she'd _somehow_ ended up paired with Jasper. Pointedly, he'd asked if she'd allow him to carry her to their destination, hands twitching at his sides as he spoke. Kiera let out a half-strangled noise of indignation before allowing her arms to ring around his neck. He'd picked her up carefully, but with firm hands, like she was both breakable yet something too wild to keep a loose hold of.

Jasper was a beautiful weirdo and Kiera was debating if she liked him or not. He was a walking, barely talking man of contradictions; he was gentle with her, but looked at her like something to eat. It brushed something in the peripherals of her awareness, tickled at her ribs in a funny little dance. Kiera narrowed her eyes at him as the world turned into a hazy blur, wondering just which side of friend or foe she should place him on.

Everything around them was one big grey and green smudge, looking less like a place renowned for its wildlife and more like an abstract oil painting. Her eyes adjusted much faster than usual, able to pinpoint the exact moment a finch took flight, it's cinnamon hued wings caught mid beat. She caught the glimpse of a smile from Jasper when she let out a small gasp and she eased into where she was cradled into his chest. The ride was over faster than she would have liked, the world coming back to her in bigger pictures rather than the snapshots of before.

When he set her down oh so timidly, his pale fingers clutching at the edges of her sleeves, Kiera pretended she was suddenly itchy. She subtly ripped her hands from his to scratch at an itch that didn't exist, her face burning. She blamed it on the pure unfairness that was vampiric beauty. How could anyone stay stable and sane around such beautiful creatures? Bella was a prime example- even now her friend was sucking in a delighted breath at something her Edward was doing.

Kiera still thought Edward looked like a sickly Victorian child, a true product of his time. The irony of her own thoughts didn't escape her, and she unintentionally smiled at Jasper. The mirth that was reserved for poking at Edward made her forget her questions surrounding the Southern vampire. But despite the confusion in his butterscotch eyes, Jasper smiled back automatically, the sight softening his usually sullen and sad face. He offered her the cap that must have fallen off and she blinked in surprise.

Sheepishly she takes it from him, their fingers ghosting across each other. Even his hands were scarred, razor-thin silver crescents embedded in flawless skin where someone tried to bite his fingers off. Kiera eyed the marks curiously, swallowing the desire to ask about them. It was a desire that was more like a deep-seated _need _to know, to find out how Jasper had survived that fight. It was instinctual to hide behind the curtain of her dark hair, allowing it to block off the hunger for knowledge in her eyes.

Instead, she focused on how he had stilled just before she had fully pulled away. He was marble; pale and unwavering and utterly bewitching- for a moment, Kiera wanted to sink her own teeth into him, to see her own row of marks left behind. She stamped that spark of a thought out before it could burn into anything more. It'd been a cruel thought, to see someone's body marked with scars and to be left wanting to leave your own.

She sent Edward an anxious glance, hoping he hadn't heard her thoughts. Edward's ochre eyes gazed only an innocent curiosity, before he was swept back up into the waves of Bella's babbling. Secure in knowing he hadn't heard, Kiera watched Jasper carefully tuck his hands into the pockets of his blue jeans. She prompted him with a questioning look, using her arms to hold herself in place.

"For a second, I could feel what you were feeling." Jasper answered after a moment's hesitation. Once again, his southern drawl pierced through. Kiera didn't want to talk about her and her otherness, she would rather harass Jasper into talking about himself. Any kind of attention on her these days was starting to feel suffocating.

"What part of the south are you from?" Kiera asked, almost pleading with him.

His demeanor shapeshifted within an instant. Standing straighter than before, with his hands behind his broad back, he spoke with a firmness that made Kiera chuckle. He bent elegantly at the waist as he spoke, a tingle running up Kiera's back at the sight."Born and bred in Houston, Texas, ma'am."

"Oh, no, please don't call me that." Kiera couldn't help the deep cringe on her face, not stopping even when Emmett outright cackled from somewhere behind her.

Jasper's confused look gave him an almost helpless air. "Oh?"

Rosalie sauntered past them both, her blonde ringlets swaying with every step as she spoke, "No woman likes to be called ma'am, Jasper."

"I liked to be called ma'am," Esme said with a smile. "It's polite."

"Correction, no young woman likes to be called ma'am." Rosalie smirked, dodging the fake outraged swipe of her mother.

"My apologies. I did not mean any offense, I sometimes forget myself." Jasper said. "I forget that times are changing, too."

"That's the way of the world, my friend. It's always changing." Kiera shrugged, lifting her arm to draw Bella close.

"Are we actually going to play baseball, or are we going to be boring all day?" Emmett whined with a childishness that wiped any sense of fear of him from Kiera's mind. "We only get to play during storms you know. What if it passes?"

Kiera raised both eyebrows and looked around at the gloomy but clear sky. "And where is this storm?"

"It's not far from us," Edward said. "We don't need the rain, only the thunder. Race you!"

Edward and Jasper began to heckle one another as they blurred their way to the field, pushing and shoving like siblings do. Bella and Kiera rolled their eyes simultaneously from where they stood, sharing a look. She was not the tiniest bit jealous that she couldn't run with them. Not at all. That'd be absurd.

"Like children." Kiera muttered, shaking her head.

"Come on Kiera, you're just mad you're too weak to join in the fun." Emmett teased, mouthing an 'ow' as Rosalie lightly smacked his chest in admonishment.

"When I hit my Metamorphosis and become an immortal, it'll be over for you fools." Kiera jeered.

"That's the attitude I like to see! It's so on." Emmett crowed, jogging at a human pace to the outfield.

Esme welcomed the girls with a bright smile behind her umpire's mask. Her and Bella fell into easy conversation, speaking of a more dangerous game that had nearly put an end to Bella's life. It'd been the only part Kiera had been interested in, honing in on details she'd missed when Bella had told her. Something like jealousy pulled at her hair like maddening little goblins, reminding her that she and Bella were only new friends. Her history with the Cullens was clear with the way she spoke to Emse, only taking breaks to boo at Alice or Emmett, the playful jeering coming easily.

Watching the Cullens play was cathartic. Like rain it cleansed her jealous thoughts, a fondness replacing it. Despite missing more than half the game, still not quite able to see every move made, Kiera knew she would agree to come out again next time. If she could, she'd find a way to siphon off the happiness that wafted from the family and bottle it for later. She could see why Bella loved this family- their happiness was addictive.

"I wish it could always be like this." Esme whispered from next to Kiera.

Esme's eyes were on Edward's thin frame, his boyish smile so wide and careful while he played with his coven. His bronze hair was more disheveled than usual, only growing worse when Jasper took a moment to ruffle it further, laughing at his brother's scowl. She could see why Esme wished for her children to be free and wild, allowed to express who and what they are without consequence. She could only guess how broken her heart must get when any of her children suffered. The love on her face made it clear that even without a blood bond, Esme was more than just the mate to their coven leader.

She was truly their mother.

Kiera's longing for her own mother was squashed down by her own two hands. She didn't need that woman, the one who had left her in pain and never bothered to come back. Maybe she didn't even want her actual mother, Kiera frowned. Maybe she just wanted what a mother should have been, what Esme was proving they should be like. It was only out of pure unluckiness that Kiera had gotten landed with such a cold birth giver.

"Why can't it be?" Kiera asked, already knowing the answer.

"Because life- especially a life like ours, doesn't come without its trials." Esme said. The word 'ours' felt heavier than normal, the word carrying a weight Kiera felt included her. It made her eyes prickle and her mouth turn cotton dry.

"At least we have a hundred tries to get it right," Kiera said. "My cousin likes to say that. Makes things a little less dark." She shifted in place and forced an indifferent shrug.

She could feel Esme look at her, and she wondered what she saw. A younger Kiera would have fit into this family with ease, she was sure. With a shyness that had bordered on painful and tooth-achingly sweet, she had been someone Esme would have been proud of. But that Kiera wouldn't have bothered with making friends with Bella. Would have preferred the company of her own people, too swamped with fearing humans and their odd quirks.

The ball whizzed past Bella's head and straight into Esme's hand, the sound of thunder doing little to blanket the loud crack it made as it landed. Esme let out a relieved breath and gave Bella a beautiful smile.

"You alright sweetheart?" Esme asked gingerly.

Bella shrugged. "Not the worst thing to happen to me on a baseball field."

Emmett let out a bark of a laugh, only to flinch when Esme's head snapped towards him. Esme's classic beauty was washed away by an animalistic snarl, her perfect white teeth bared as she launched the ball back to Emmett.

"Emmett, do be more careful. Your sisters are a bit more frail than you are at the moment." Esme scolded. Her ugly lion's grimace smoothed back into her sweet features once more, shaking her finger.

Kiera pinked as the realization hit that she'd been included once again. The bright giggle from earlier bubbled in her chest, and she couldn't stop it in time, her laugh momentarily erasing all the exhaustion from her face. Bella only joined in with her friend, the both of them doubling over and taking turns to gasp out funny little additions to the conversation, only fueling their laughter more. The two 'fragile' girls leaned against each other, even as Edward bounded over to check on Bella.

Kiera only laughed harder at his concerned face. He looked like a mother hen, having clearly taken after his coven mother with her overprotective nature. Or she'd simply aggravated that particular feature of his with her constant fussing. He wouldn't need to one day, when Bella was turned. At least not about her safety. If anything, it'd be everyone else's safety he'd have to worry about. Newborn vampires were notoriously brutal creatures, every monster knowing that Newborns were unstable and nearly unstoppable. Bella had told her of Edward's refusal to turn her, that she'd be far too gone in her bloodlust to remain the same Bella.

But surely he'd changed his mind, since they were back together with the promise of forever?

"Careful, Eddie boy. She'll be stronger than you one day." Kiera grinned. "We will tag team you."

Edward moved before she even had the chance to blink. Kiera's hair lifted with the force of his speed, and she blinked up at him in confusion. He seemed so tortured, seething with anger and something she thought was an agonized pleasure. Jasper was at her side not a moment later, his face leaning into Edwards as he bared down at his brother. He must have felt what Kiera had seen, and it must have been bad enough for him to care enough to step in.

"She will _never_ be a vampire." Edward spat.

Kiera gaped. "What do you mean? You guys are together, right? You can't spend time together forever if she's human."

Jasper's words were more of a growl, eyes the color of slick tar. "Watch how you speak to her. She didn't know."

"Know what?" Kiera asked, throwing her arms up in the air.

"Edward doesn't want to change me still," Bella mumbled with the telling annoyance of an old argument never changing. "He thinks he's protecting my soul or whatever."

"I agree with him," Rosalie said, letting the silver bat rest against her toned shoulders, watching the scene before her with calculating eyes. "I still think it's asinine to even have brought her into this, but well…." She shrugged and took a lazy swing, the bat singing as it arced through the air.

"But humans are so breakable," Kiera continued, uneasiness filling her.

Something dark whispered in her that Edward didn't want to turn Bella because he instinctually knew it'd take away the best meal of his life. Bella was his singer, her blood called to him and filled him with such a violent hunger, that even his love wasn't always enough. Turning Bella would change her, make her blood turn to venom. Then what would he drink?

Edward's eyes turned black with anger and he tried to dodge his brother. Jasper held onto him tightly, snarling viciously. His warning from earlier had fallen on deaf ears, Edward's sharp teeth snapping at the air in front of Kiera's face, only for Jaspers' scarred hand to grab ahold of it in a tight grip. She trembled in place, her only comfort the electric zinging of her blood. Blue sparks danced between her fingertips, the humming of electricity steadily growing louder. She could smell ozone building up, and it took her a moment to realize it was coming from her.

"Edward, I didn't mean it. My thoughts haven't been kind lately, but you can't tell me as a vampire that yours are any better." She searched his twisted face for an ounce of understanding, nodding slowly at his flinch. "I'd rather not shoot my best friend's boyfriend up with lightning...so please calm down. You're scaring me."

Like a switch had been flicked, Edward went limp in Jasper's arms. Shame, annoyance, pain- every emotion under the sun took a second to shine on his face before being replaced. Kiera waited for an eternity before forcing the flow of lightning to dissipate. The field was deathly silent, and Kiera wanted to pull her hair out. She didn't like trying to use her ability due to its unstable nature, but her fear must have triggered it anyways. Now she knew she'd have to explain what the hell just happened.

"Way to go Pikachu!" Emmett's voice broke through her tired silence, sending a ripple of shock through her.

Pikachu? He thought she was a cute and cuddly little lightning mouse? Not some freak of nature, even by Diwata standards? Kiera didn't know if that was heartwarming or insulting.

"Here, your hair is all staticy." Alice bounced over, tracing small hands over Kiera's dark locks.

Carlise, Emmett, and Rosalie herded Edward to the treeline, their mouths already moving faster than Kiera could see. Jasper stayed were he stood in front of her, taking in deep breathes, allowing Esme to place a calming hand on his arm. Her best friend stared open-mouthed after her boyfriend, before shaking her head mutely.

"I'm so going to yell at him for this. That was just utterly embarrassing." Bella groaned, putting her face in her hands.

"Usually I would excuse him, but I haven't felt that threatened in a while. Even amongst the Volturi, and Jane literally tried to make my insides fire." Kiera muttered.

"Jane?" Jasper's voice was sharp as he slowly turned around. "How come I was not made aware of this?"

"Because you might have pulled an Edward." Alice rolled her eyes. "Jasper is a bit of an overprotective fool, especially when it comes to us."

"It must be a supernatural thing. Ramona has tried to behead people more times than I can count." Kiera shrugged.

"Why didn't you tell us about your power, dear?" Esme asked, clearly put out. She let Bella come into her arms, rubbing the human girls shoulder soothingly.

"Oh, Esme," Kiera sighed. "I didn't keep it front you on purpose, I just don't know your coven all that well. Sharing all my secrets in one go wouldn't be very smart."

"No, I guess not." Esme said with a soft voice.

"Excuse me, I'm going to go talk to my boyfriend." Bella muttered, brown eyes set on the treeline. Even if he were getting the shout-down of a lifetime by Rosalie, for her and an angry Bella to tag team him? She almost felt sorry for the dude. Almost. Bella walked off the field and disappeared into the forest, a swell of misplaced pride growing in Kiera's chest for her friend backbone.

"Don't be too hard on him Bella," Esme shouted after her. "He's already getting it from Rose!"'

Jasper snorted. Kiera rubbed at her temples, the beginnings of a mean migraine forming. Any energy she had before the baseball game was now gone. She wanted nothing more than to crawl into bed and possibly sleep for another seventeen years, but she still hadn't broached the topic of imprinting. With all that's happened without a few hour's time, Kiera doubted she'd get any answers today. Instead, she turned to Jasper with her hands on her hips.

"Take me home?" Kiera asked.

Jasper frowned but nodded. "Of course."

* * *

The storm had moved, catching Kiera and Jasper in its midst. Resting her forehead on the window only did so much for her headache. She thought forlornly about how cold the Cullen's hands were, and how sweet they'd be across her sweaty brow. She must have said it out loud, causing Jasper to huff out a laugh. Kiera swiveled her head to look at him from the corner of her eye.

"Here." Jasper murmured, reaching out to her without taking his eyes off the road. Kiera eyed his hand curiously, her face breaking into a grin when his intentions clicked.

Smiling, Kiera took his cool hand and rested in above her eyes. She couldn't help the sigh that escaped her, letting out a small groan. Touching skin to skin like this, Kiera knew he could feel what she felt. But as tired as she was, she wasn't worried about it. All he would feel is her sheer exhaustion from the day. But as funny as the situation was, Jasper's smile only twisted into a frown that got deeper with every minute.

"I apologize for my brother," Jasper said. His remaining hand gripped the steering wheel, threatening leave indents. "He's an emotional idiot. He never should have acted that way with you."

A jolt of apprehension ran through her and Jasper's grip tightened, the steering wheel giving out an unsteady grown. Carefully, she took Jasper's hand and set it back on the wheel. Jasper only frowned more.

"I thought some pretty terrible stuff. I thought he didn't want to turn Bella because then his meal would be gone." Kiera admitted.

"Our thoughts are normally our own. It's just harder for Edward, he can't shut it off. I won't make excuses for him, but his relationship with Bella's mortality is a sensitive topic. If you think I or Rosalie or even Edward himself think beautiful things all the time, you're mistaken." Jasper said.

"If he doesn't turn her, the Volturi will. He doesn't have a choice. And shouldn't Bella get a say? It's like he's stuck in ye olden days." Kiera sighed, rubbing at her temples again.

"Edward...means well. And maybe you are right, he is a little stuck." Jasper allowed with a twitch of his lips.

"If I could change her, I would." Kiera said. "She's the first friend I've had in a while, losing her isn't an option."

"She's part of the family. We won't let anything happen to her." Jasper murmured.

The car rolled to a stop in front of Kiera's house. With Alice, Kiera had felt so embarrassed by her small home and it's cracking paint. But something told her Jasper could care less about her house and what it looked like. Aside from a curious glance that she barely caught, Jasper kept his eyes on her face. Either he was better with people than he first appeared, or he really didn't care about how broke Kiera was.

It was a change of pace from Seb, at least.

The streetlights cast his handsome face in shadows, the starkness of their depth only highlighting his ochre eyes. Memories of traversing the south with Ramona were reflected by his desert blonde hair, his small smile warming her like the scorching rays of the summer sun. She wondered how old he was, what time he'd lived in Texas. Maybe in another life, where they were both human; they could have traveled the sandy plains together, allowing their tender skin to bask in the heat like lizards. They could have shared water canteens and raced their horses. Maybe he would have fallen in love with the shutter of a camera as she had, and they could have taken pictures of other wanderers. They could have been friends.

Kiera gives him one last smile as he writes out his number for her, telling her to call if she ever needs anything. She knows she'll need a new phone before she can even think about calling him, but it was the thought that counts. Turning to get out of the car, she met her own dark eyes in the rearview mirror and choked on her gasp.

It wasn't her that made her gasp. Jasper, who she knew was next to her and should be showing up with her, was nothing but a ghostly mirage. His face was blurred like someone had taken a smudge tool and ran it across his features. The immediate area around him also warped, his edges licking up like sheer flames that moved in time with her breathing. She whipped her head to double-check if Jasper was still there, only to find him cringing.

"We do that." He said, smile slipping into a frown once more. "Hollywood got that partially correct...terribly enough."

Kiera couldn't think, couldn't process. "Must make it hell to get ready in the morning huh?" She muttered, giving her best-lopsided smile.

Jasper's eyes softened and they shared a quiet chuckle. Before she could try to brave the rain, Jasper's door hung wide open and she found the blonde opening her own. An umbrella she hadn't noticed earlier rested in his hand, and he used it to shield her from the worst of the downpour. She smiled to herself, knowing no one's ever held an umbrella for her.

"Alice?" She asked.

"Of course." Jasper said, offering a hand to help her out of the car. "The little pixie would have my hide if I hadn't brought one today."

Kiera let out a laugh at the nickname and made sure to tuck it away for later. Jasper's hand was as cold as a cadaver, sending an icy chill up her arm, one she tried to conceal from her new friend. He must have felt her shudder, but he said nothing. For a moment, they just smiled at each other from underneath the umbrella. Walking her to her door in comfortable silence, Kiera couldn't help but feel remorseful over her initial wariness of Jasper.

"You're not really what I thought you'd be like." She admitted as they got closer to her front door.

"You are and you aren't what I thought you would be like," Jasper said with a smirk. "But this version of you is more interesting, especially with that lightning trick I saw of yours."

"You saw that? You had your back turned though!" Kiera said.

"Vampires have fast reflexes. You didn't see me look over my shoulder when you were getting ready to fry my brother." Jasper chuckled.

"Touche." She fake narrowed her eyes at him, trying to smother her smile. "I'm glad Bella has harassed me into getting to know you and your family. Even if Edward is kind of a brat."

"Give him time. He'll grow on you. Might be like fungus, but he'll grow on you." Jasper said amusedly. "He has a way of doing that."

Kiera thought that maybe, just maybe, the rest of the Cullens would grow on her like fungus too.

* * *

For the first time in weeks, Kiera slept soundly. Light snores left her as she dreamed of sandy plains and warm southern sunsets, her dream world cast in soft oranges and pinks. Sand particles sifted through her bare toes, her ankles brushing past cacti that curiously held no needles. With her favorite horse carrying her old camera, she was free to run her fingers against the accordion-style body, unable to feel the heat of the day on its metal knobs.

Kiera wanted to stay in this dream forever.

_Knock._

Kiera barely shifted, a frown marring her sleeping features. Maybe if she ignored it, it'd go away. Already she was slipping back into her dream, a pale hand entwining with her own. It gleamed in the sun and Kiera watched in fascination at its aura of iridescence formed a kaleidoscope that shined from its fingers. She wanted to-

_Knock. Knock. Knock!_

Each knock got louder, her front door threatening to buckle beneath the knocker's frantic hands. Kiera snarled and thrashed, her comforter tangling with her and sending her to the floor in a twisted heap. She fought valiantly against the blanket's hold, cursing as her fist tore a hole somewhere close to the middle. The knocking was accompanied by a hoarse voice calling her name and Kiera froze.

Ever so slowly, Kiera untangled her limbs and got to her feet, padding softly to the front door. Images of the vampire who broke in flashed through her mind, and she spent a moment talking herself down from her mounting terror. The vampire would have broken in if it was here, she assured herself. It was utterly capable of doing so, and Kiera knew it knew no shame either. Not even the decorum of common decency would stop it like it was stopping the person at her doorstep.

Without any way to check who was knocking, Kiera took a calculated risk. Foolishly, lightning gathered at her hands, it's blue neon glow lighting up the dark. She unlocked the door, took a deep breath, and opened.

A fist rushed at her face and Kiera let out a scream. Lighting burst from her fingertips, cackling wildly. It surged through the air as it passed a man's chest, barely missing. The man had dodged with a yelp and slipped in the mud. Kiera tried to coax another volt, but the man scrambled to his feet before she could, snagging both of her wrists and placing his face in front of hers.

"Relax, it's me! Kiera, it's Paul!" Paul rumbled, his dark eyes illuminated by the waning moon.

"Paul, what the hell?!" Kiera yelled. "You almost punched me in the face!"

"I was going for another knock!" Paul said, tossing her hands aside. "You didn't need to try and fry me!"

"Again, you almost punched me!" Kiera threw her arms above her, asking for patience. She was about to go off, to tell him she could have killed him, that he was an idiot- But his face looked so tired and worn that she stopped herself short.

"What's wrong?" Kiera asked with a sigh. She shuddered as rain threatened to drench her, impulsive grabbing ahold of his giant hand to pull him inside. "Take your shoes off. There's a shelf next to the door, you can put them there."

"Um," Paul said. "I'm not wearing any shoes…" He stood there awkwardly, looking comically huge in her small home, his frame soaked.

"Paul, seriously? Mud is a drag to get out of carpet." Kiera sighed again, veering off to get towels for him. "Stay here a second."

"Phasing makes it hard to keep clothes and shoes…"Paul muttered.

"Ramona makes it hard to live when the carpet is ruined." Kiera called back dryly, handing him the armful of towels she'd taken from the hall closet. "Are you going to tell me what's wrong?"

Paul stayed silent, working his way through the towels and passing them back to her when he couldn't use them anymore. He bent down to clean up his feet, the mud easily sliding off with a practiced hand. It was clear he was used to cleaning up for himself. That was good, Kiera hated cleaning and definitely didn't want to clean up after a near stranger, bond or not.

She gave him his space for the moment, drifting got the living room and turning on the sole lamp. Paul followed silently, placing his dirty towels in same basket she did, shadowing her until they both sat on the lumpy couch Ramona insisted on getting. He was shirtless, a running theme with the pack it seemed. Clad only in -gross- jorts, Paul looked young. He shifted to look at her, running a hand through his long black locks that gleamed like a raven's feather in the low light.

"I'm sorry for suddenly showing up." Paul started. "I'd just gotten off patrol and gotten home when my mom woke up. She'd decided it was the perfect time to talk about the pack and my phasing, asking if I could just...stop. Like it was some choice. Like I haven't tried."

He was beginning to shake, and Kiera scooted back before she could think. Paul's face twisted into a pained expression, the skin by his mouth growing taut. "I'm in control. I won't hurt you."

"I believe you, but I also know Emily's face didn't just come to be." Kiera said, frowning.

"Emily's face was an accident. She'd been too close when the pack was roughhousing, and she'd got caught by a stray paw. It'd taken weeks for Sam to let us in the house again." Paul said.

"Accidents can happen. Which is why I scooted back." Kiera said. She didn't say anything more about Emily, the regret about misjudging the situation could come to claim her some other night. Tonight she focused on Paul and the urger to comfort him.

With Paul so close, the warmth in her chest had spread, branching out through her veins. Part of it was comforting, to know she wasn't alone. But it was mostly terrifying to know someone could take up that much space inside of you, forging their own path beneath your bones. She cursed not asking the Cullens for more information. Then she cursed knowing Edward was bound to give her another awkward apology for his behavior.

"You okay?" Paul asked, amused.

"I should be asking you that." Kiera said. "Are you okay Paul? Really?"

Paul placed with one of his ear piercings, his expression pensive. "I guess I am. It sucks fighting with her, she knows I don't have a choice. She just gets so worried. And then it makes me worry more, then I get angry cause I don't know how to like...handle being worried I guess?"

"She loves you, enough to argue over your safety. " Kiera said, words clumsy in her mouth. The monster with a green eye talked in her ear, spitting vitriol about how ungrateful Paul was for a mother who loved him. She shoved it away.

"I just want her to have a stress free life." Paul shrugged. "She deserves that at least. She's a single mom with a full-time job as a nurse. She's taken on my finances too, there are only so many hours I can work and still make patrols. She deserves to not worry about me."

Kiera blinked sluggishly and nodded. She wasn't sure she understood fully, but with Ramona in her life, she could at least understand a little. At a time like this, Ramona would pull Kiera into her arms and hug until the sadness dissipated enough to be manageable. So that's what Kiera did. She leaned over and pulled Paul into her arms, awkwardly patting his back. He immediately threw his arms around her, almost lifting her off the couch with his tight embrace.

"There, there." She mumbled awkwardly. "Did you want some hot chocolate or something? Maybe a sandwich?"

Paul's chest vibrated as he laughed. "I could always use a sandwich. Or two."

"I hoped you'd say no. But okay, cool, I'll make one." Kiera teased, pushing back to detangle.

Paul let her, the lack of tension in his shoulders a relief to Kiera. She gave him a small smile and went into the kitchen, shuffling around as she made him a fat sandwich with the rest of the cold cuts they had. She couldn't help him with this problem, but she could always fix him a plate of food in these trying times.

When she'd come back into the living room, Paul was sprawled out on the sofa, his feet hanging off the side. He could barely keep his eyes open, even as he made gimme hands at the plate she was holding. She held it just out of reach for a moment, only giving in when he leveled her with an annoyed scoff. She snickered as he ate, watching with rapt attention. He inhaled his food, almost literally breathing it in. Before she could offer another, Paul let out a large yawn.

Leaning back to check the digital clock in the kitchen, Kiera inwardly sighed. It was just shy of three in the morning, the world outside already starting to return to life with color. Looking back at Paul, she shrugged. Disappearing for a second, she returned with a pillow from her room and a thick blanket used for guests.

"Get some sleep." Kiera said, placing the pillow and blanket on his stomach. Paul smiled at her with warm eyes already half asleep, his voice quiet.

"Thank you, Kiera." He said. "I think I'm glad it had to be you."

Kiera shooed away his sentiments with a hand. "Okay, no mushy stuff this early in the morning. Don't scream if Ramona tried to chase you out."

Paul's chuckles followed her as she walked to her room, a smile on her face.


	10. An Understanding

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> An: Sorry for the shorter chapter, guys. My cat just passed away this past Monday, and I really haven't had to motivation to do much of anything. Let me know if you enjoyed this chapter. Stay safe and healthy!

Kiera never wanted to talk to Mike Fucking Newton again. To see him ever, would be to see him too soon. He was a loudmouth who drooled over Bella every chance he got, his childish antics, and need for her attention churning like a maelstrom in her gut. She remembers being like him. Begging for attention. A dog at the foot of the table, whining for scraps.

He'd been more bearable in the beginning. Just a touch too loud, but kind and almost funny. But lately, he's gotten worse. Erratic and moody, on a high that never seemed to come down safely. And now they stood under a Fir tree, the deep green of it the only soothing thing in sight. Mike held her wrist in a sweaty grip, his slick fingers shaking.

"What?" Kiera snapped.

"You heard me. Who's your dealer?" Mike spat. "Don't even try to lie, I know an addict when I see one."

And it clicked. Mike Fucking Newton was a drug addict.

"Are you kidding me right now? What the shit, Mike? I'm not a druggie!" Kiera said, ripping her wrist from his grasp.

"Come on, don't play coy. We're in the same boat. Withdrawal, right? What is it, coke?" He gave her a once over, tone turning snide. "Or something harder?"

Kiera sputtered, the audacity of his questions blackening the edges of her vision. Her gums began to ache. Maybe ripping into him just this once would be okay. She shook her head, the haze of her anger fleeing.

"I don't do drugs, you asshole," Kiera hissed. "I'm _dying_."

Mike blinked sluggishly, the red of his eyes standing out against watery blue. "You're what?"

"I'm sick. Dying. Heading to the final dirt nap, six feet below." Kiera said impatiently. She racked her brain for any more sayings, something to get this human boy to understand. "Going to kick the bucket. You got it now?"

"Do you have cancer?" His hand fell slack at his side after his callous question, a worry she didn't expect in his face. "Have you talked to Dr. Cullen? He's the best in Forks. I'm sure he could help you out-"

"Dr. Cullen can't help me with this." Kiera shook her head. "Now if you'll excuse me, I need lunch."

Kiera turned from Mike, her short nails digging into the meat of her palms. She could feel herself trembling, worn without her anger to fuel her. Mike's hand reached out once more, gripping onto the strap of her bag and threatening to tip her over. A yelp escaped her lips and just as she swung around to sink her teeth into the side of his face, the back of Lauren's head blocked her view. Mike's hand was now buckling beneath Lauren's grip, her face a twisted scornful smile. His cry of pain was silenced by Lauren's free hand, her neon pink fingernails clasping tightly over his mouth.

"I'm going to tell you just this once, Newton. You're going to fuck off, and never come back. You do and I'll literally kill you. Yeah?" Mike nodded and Lauren grunted, her hands flying off of him as if he burned her. "Go out of my face."

Mike scrambled from view, tumbling once before getting back to his feet. Lauren's limbs trembled, her breathing heavy. Staring at Lauren, Kiera stomped on the nagging voice in the back of her head telling her Lauren was a danger. Lauren was human, and Lauren was her friend. And she'd just scared off Mike Newton, so that was a huge bonus.

When Lauren turned around, she flipped her choppy shell-pink tipped hair in a move Kiera didn't doubt was practiced a hundred times. It still was impressive. Lauren settled her cornflower eyes on Kiera's waxen and drain face, her snarl twisting further.

"Next time, just poke one of his eyes out or something." Lauren scowled. "You good?"

"Yeah I'm fine," Kiera muttered. "How did you get here?"

Lauren sighed, twisting an erratic strand of hair around a chipper fingernail. "I was going to my Ethics class when I saw him grab you. Then I guess I blacked out or something, cause next thing I knew, I was in Mike's face. What the fuck did he want anyway?"

Kiera adjusted her backpack, pulling at the soft strap. It'd been a gift from Ramona and was one of the nicest things Kiera owned. She'd seen it in a bookstore and it'd been the only thing she'd asked for since she awoke, and she guessed Ramona couldn't say no to that one thing. When she'd found it on her bed the next day, she'd held it and cried for over an hour. She'd taken good care of it ever since, the rich dark leather treatest with the utmost care.

"He thinks I'm on the coke." Kiera sighed, shrugging her shoulders.

"You're definitely not on drugs. You wouldn't say 'on the coke' if you were. Actually, you shouldn't say that anyways, people are going to think you're inept. It's 'doing coke' or 'on coke'." Lauren shook her head.

Kiera threw her arms up in the air. "I give up, this place is stupid."

"You say that like you're somehow different from the rest of us." Lauren rolled her eyes. "Hate to break it to you babe, but you're just as low as we mere mortals."

Kiera bit back a smile. For all that she was, and Lauren Mallory was a lot of things, she was kind of a bitch. But Kiera liked that about her. Lauren was unafraid of speaking her mind, but Kiera? Kiera could barely order her own food at a restaurant.

"Look, I didn't mean to scare you or whatever. I'm just PMSing really hard, and he pissed me off…" Lauren trailed off, looking contrite and hating herself for it.

Kiera wisely didn't say that Lauren's very loud announcement of her period two weeks ago would make her current statement false. Unless she was already forgetting how periods work. That'd be fair. Her own had finally subsided and she was not clouded with thoughts of her upcoming death. Or the Death Debut party. Speaking of which, she needs to get back to Alice with ideas for the party.

Alice had been calling the house phone incessantly to talk about it. She'd seen a single vision of Bella receiving an invitation in the mail and had gone postal, aggressively trying to plan a party that she knew nothing about. Yet. It was always yet with Alice. Slowly, the Cullens were starting to integrate themselves into Kiera and Ramona's life. Alice showed up when she wished, and even Esme came around to drop off meals for Kiera when Ramona was out.

She almost extended an invite to Lauren, but she bit it back at the very last moment. None of their friends from class could come. It was bad enough the Cullens were going to be there, along with any family or friends Ramona could get ahold of. Kiera didn't think her school friends needed to be a part of that particular party. Lauren was staring at her with her thin brows raised, her gaze unimpressed.

"You alright? Period talk still wig you out?" Lauren asked.

"Opps. Sorry, I was...thinking about Matt, thanks again for that." Kiera lied, an awkward smile on her face.

Lauren shrugged and looked off to the side, face uncomfortable. "Yeah. Oh, goodie, your friends are here. Anyways, I'm out. See you later."

Lauren walked off, shoulders stiff. As if on cue, Jasper and Edward's faces of stone carved perfection caught Kiera's eye. They were pulling up to the drop-off curb in Edward's car, Jasper's golden eyes scanning the campus for something. The moment he saw Kiera, a smile crossed his face. Kiera gave him an awkward wave, brows pinching.

"They are here to pick us up. Alice's orders." Bella said, coming to stand next to Kiera. She looked worn but happy, eyes softening at the sight of her boyfriend. But the way she held herself made it clear they were still not done talking about the stunt Edward pulled on the baseball field.

While weak for Edward, Bella was starting to grow steel in her that Kiera couldn't help but be proud of. Edward could be a bit of a control freak, and Bella was so easy going that she just let him get away with it. But it seemed things were shifting, Kiera noticed with a small smirk. It fell off her face when Edward got out of the car and made his way over. She tensed in his presence, glancing behind him at Jasper unconsciously. Jasper only gave her a slow nod, his hawk-like gaze never wavering.

"Kiera," Edward started. Oh no. Here comes another awkward talk. Edward smiled as if hearing her thoughts. If an anvil could come from the sky and crush her now, Kiera would be thankful. "I would like to sincerely apologize for my behavior the other day."

"And?" Bella prodded, a stubborn set to her chin.

"And it won't happen again." Edward continued. "It was terribly rude of me, regardless of my own feelings at the time, I should not have reacted the way I did."

Kiera eyed him thoughtfully. When she'd brought it up to Ramona, Ramona had gone into a long discussion about how anxiety and depression could create fierce reactions in people, and how it can be heightened as a vampire. On top of Kiera's thoughts about Edward's weakness concerning Bella's blood, it must have touched the beast in him and 'swung at it with a barbed stick' as Ramona had put it. Kiera had grown up around immortals, known how predatory and violent they could be. Part of her could forgive that. But more and more, Edward was falling on her bad side.

"While I'll accept your apology, I should let you know I'm still not happy with you and I'm not going to be until you prove to me you deserve to be around Bella. I hope you don't snap at her like you snapped at me." Kiera said, wary.

Edward's features became tight and he seemed to pale even further, making the dark circle beneath his eyes stand out like bruises. "Never. And I'll work to get back into your good graces, whatever it takes. We are friends now, I wouldn't truly wish you harm. I really do apologize."

"You just have terrible luck and timing, it seems." Kiera mutters with a shrug. Edward nodded with understanding. If Italy hadn't happened, if he'd never left Bella to hurt as he did- they might have been better friends by now. But he had, and so they weren't.

"Why don't you go wait in the car?" Bella prompted, nudging Kiera forward. "I want a quick word with my boyfriend."

Eager to avoid the incoming lover's spat, Kiera scrambled across the grassy belt and made her way to Edward's car. Jasper got out of the passenger's side to open the door for her, nodding but not speaking as she climbed in with a near-silent thanks. He shut the door soundly before climbing back into his spot, his pale hand tweaking with the heater.

"Do they fight often?" Kiera asked. She propped her chin on a closed fist, watching the bickering couple with bored eyes.

"Yes and no. Their fights have no teeth." Jasper drawled.

"I'd hope not." Kiera muttered, the two of them sharing an amused look through the rearview mirror. Or, Kiera amused they were sharing a look. Jasper was still a blur, a mere impression left behind by a careless artist.

"Some couples thrive in chaos." He added.

"How healthy." Kiera smiled as Jasper let out a chuckle, not at all afraid of the dark edge to it.

"Not every couple is sunshine and roses. You know, Bella nearly broke up with Edward because of his stunt at the baseball field. It was the fiercest I've ever seen her. Her love for you runs deep." Jasper said.

"Oh?" Kiera looked out her window, her smile turning contemplative as she watched Bella and Edward speak. Edward seems stiffer than usual, a cowed look on his handsome face. "I'm glad they didn't break up. She loves him a lot, I'd hate them to split over me."

"He loves her a lot too." His voice had turned soft. "More than I imagined he would. It makes sense, in hindsight."

"It's just his luck to love the one thing he shouldn't, isn't it?" Kiera mused.

"It's just like Edward." Jasper agreed quietly.

* * *

"You're scent reminds me of my family home." Emmett admitted, the two of them lounging across the family sofa.

Everyone was settled in for a movie night, and Emmett had all but demanded he got his 'turn' to sit next to Kiera. Rosalie sat curled up against his side, her golden eyes trained on the screen, but Kiera could tell she was listening. The sadness in Emmett's voice was barely noticeable, but when Jasper twitched on the arm at her side, she knew Emmett must truly be feeling upset.

They likely all were. Edward, who was leaning against the sofa, sitting on the floor with Bella's head on his lap. Esme and Carlise spoke quietly from the love seat, in a world of their own, but glancing over. Alice who sent her a wide grin from across the room, her tiny body engulfed by a cashmere blanket. Only her tiny hands showed as she feverishly texted somebody. Kiera couldn't help but smile at her. She was texting Demetri, then.

"What did your family home smell like?" Kiera asked quietly.

"It smelt like...fresh thyme. We didn't have much, but we had a small section of the farm where my sister grew what she could. You have more to your scent, something earthly like soil, but also tropical? Like lemongrass. Sometimes the thyme is so strong…" Emmett shrugs. He gives Rosalie a half-smile as she rubbed circles on his back.

"There's a hint of sharp ozone to you're scent beneath all that." Jasper whispered in her ear, his hair tickling her jaw."Like the sky before a storm. Sparks up more when you're upset it seems."

"It's a nice smell." Emmett rushed to add. "Almost makes me feel warm."

"I'm glad you like the way I smell." Kiera teased, leaning into the mountain of a man.

Emmett was someone easy to befriend, once you got past his sheer size that was meant to intimidate. Kiera never had a brother. Hadn't thought about having one either. But being around Emmett, the safety he brings even in his companionable silence- she found herself wishing she had one.

"That reminds me. Didn't you say you had something to tell me?" Bella asked, looking up at her friend.

"It's not just my secret to share." Kiera continued, pausing when she saw more than one vampire glance her way. So they were listening. That was good right? They might know what's going on. "It also involves wolves."

The unease in her words demanding the coven's full attention. Kiera shrugged, knowing she couldn't just keep it to herself for the sake of their family night, even if it were a rare treat for them. She took a moment to gather herself, momentarily reveling in the fact that she had their undivided attention without even asking.

"What do you know about imprinting?" Kiera watched as any color drained from Bella's face. Jasper's hand twitched at his side, his pinky resting over hers, his cold touch sending a chill down Kiera's spine.

"No way," Bella whispered. "Don't tell me, someone-"

"Is it that bad?" Kiera's voice shook. "It doesn't have to be, right? Is there a way to break it?"

"Break what?" Rosalie interrupted. "What the hell is imprinting?"

Kiera chanced a look at Carlisle. His face was drawn, his lips pressed tightly together as he thought. Whatever he was sifting through, whether it be the endless expanse of time itself or merely the memories that came with it, he was pulled in deep. His searching look concerned his wife, who clung into his grasp. The angry buzzing of bees clouded Kiera's thoughts, her dark eyes unable to find the source of the odd high pitched noise. It was too fast to place, too frantic to sort through, leaving Kiera feeling uneasy.

She'd thought she'd gone crazy till something in her ears popped and she could catch bits and pieces of lightning-paced words. A sneaking suspicion guided Kiera's gaze to Jasper, catching his lips twitching ever so slightly before his face became stone again. Her concentration must have been felt because his golden eyes latched onto her with a burning intensity she could swear was building under her skin. The Cullens were a hive, speaking at once and almost unnoticeable to the mortal eye. Their words prickled over her skin in fresh goosebumps, and she wondered how many times they spoke without her hearing them.

"Stop!" Kiera's heart thundered in her chest, and she covered her ears to escape from the buzzing.

Everyone's eyes were locked on hers at once and Kiera shivered. Esme looked away from her, an apology in her grimace. Kiera didn't have the energy to tell her about how much their fast-talking freaked her out. Instead, she focused on the problem at hand, rubbing at her throbbing temples.

"This is your gentle reminder that I'm here, and if you're talking about me, I'd rather you say it to my face. And please, don't do the buzzing thing. It's loud and kind of hurts my ears."

"Buzzing thing, dear?" Esme questioned, wringing her hands.

"We shall refrain from talking about you in front of you. Our apologies, Kiera." Carlisle's fatherly tone was meant to be soothing, but it only sent a shot of irritation through her.

"When you talk so fast and so low, it sounds like a hive swarming my brain. I thought my ears were going to start bleeding for a moment." Kiera grimaced. It was a slight exaggeration, but it'd hopefully be enough to get them to stop.

"What is imprinting, Bella?" Edward asked, gathering his girlfriend into his arms. Any trace of calm was washed from his face, the same solemn and tortured expression he usually had taking back it's place. Bella and Kiera silently looked at each other. It'd only take a nod from Kiera and Bella would share everything for her, but Kiera knew she had to do this part on her own.

"Imprinting is when a shapeshifter of the Quileute tribe finds their soulmate." Kiera continued to rub her temples, letting out a heavy sigh. "Paul Lahote imprinted on me."

The world could have exploded and none of the Cullens would have moved a single inch. Stiller than statues, they each were rooted to the spot with various expressions of shock or anger taking ahold of their usually angelic faces. It was like watching a grenade go off, one that started up the annoying buzzing once more. This time, the words were coming out faster and angrier, harsher on Kiera's not-quite mortal ears. Jasper's was the most desperate, a howling pitch to each word. Before Kiera could snap at them to stop, Rosalie spoke.

"What does that even mean?" Rosalie snarled. She was coiled like a snake at her boyfriend's side, her lovely gold eyes narrowed to slits.

"Jacob would say it's to meet your best biological match to have kids with." Kiera shrugged. "But I believe Paul's version. That the wolves can platonically imprint."

"What makes you so sure about that?" Jasper asked, ragged.

"Because I can't have kids." Kiera said. Rosalie flinched, the corners of her mouth softening.

"And so it renders Jacob's point useless, then." Carlisle mused.

"I still feel the bond. If Jacob was right, wouldn't it have broken by now to find the next best candidate?"

"Theoretically, yes," Carlisle said. "But keep in mind this is a bond not bound by science. Anything could happen."

"Is there any way to break it?" Emmett demanded, wrapping a firm arm around Kiera's shoulders.

"Not that I know of. No." Carlisle said slowly.

"Why are you so ready to think of it as a bad thing?" Esme asked, putting up her hands in a placating manner when the room turned on her. "Paul said it could be platonic. So far, is it?"

It was Kiera's turn to squirm. She offered a shrug, one that didn't make herself or anyone else in the room feel any better. "It is. I can feel him in my chest, a physical thing. But I don't want to kiss him, or like, marry him if that's what you're asking."

"Then we are worrying for nothing." Esme smiled. "There is nothing to break if you have nothing to fear."

"I'm not so sure about that. I absolutely hate that I suddenly have some supernatural connection to a man I just met. It's….scary. Being so out of control of my own fate."

Kiera felt her heart leaped to her throat when the doorbell rang. She'd forgotten they ordered food and chuckled at her skittishness. Jasper left her side for a moment, only to return to the living room with a box of pizza and a liter of Coke in his hands. The scent of gooey cheese and salty pepperoni was a welcomed one. Bella grumbled under her breath about the topping choices but gave a crow of happiness when she'd seen that the other half was a Veggie Lovers.

The girls sat alone at the dining room table, more than happy to stuff their faces. The Cullens continued their annoying buzzing, but Kiera couldn't care less at the moment. She was too busy scarfing down her slice, hungry for the first time in days. Their glass cups-because of course they were glass-were filled to the brim with the fizzling drink. She silently thanked the delivery person for interrupting what was becoming a taxing conversation.

She'd gotten her answer. No, no one knew how to break it. The idea of going home to an empty house, with no answers to tide her attention over, bothered her. Kiera frowned at her sudden loss of appetite, placing the half-eaten piece back onto the plate.

"What's wrong?" Bella asked around a mouthful of veggies.

"Do you want to have a sleepover? I'm not looking forward to sleeping alone tonight." Kiera admitted.

Before Bella could answer, Alice flashed into the room with a giddy smile. "How about a sleepover here? We could watch movies, paint each other's nails, maybe put on a fashion show-"

"We want them to have fun Alice, not scare them off!" Emmett hollered from the other room, followed by Jasper's raspy laughter.

Alice scrunched up her face and stuck her tongue out in his direction. Rolling her eyes and mocking Emmett's words, she dramatically threw herself into the seat next to Kiera's.

"Oh, how he wounds me." She said with a sigh, bringing the back of her hand to her forehead. "The cruelty. The audacity."

"Okay Dramatica, take it down a notch." Kiera said with a snort.

"Pot, meet Kettle." Bella says under her breath, a cheeky smile splitting crookedly across her face. She squawked when both Alice and Kiera slapped her arms lightly, raising her straight brows in faux annoyance.

"So, what do you say? Just say yes already, I know you want to." Alice sang out, kicking her lithe legs back and forth.

"Sure. But I get to pick the movie." Kiera said, pointing a finger at Alice. "And no fashion show, I'm too tired to try to get out of a tule infested dress without dying via suffocation."

Alice and Bella shared a look. "Kettle." They said simultaneously, bursting into laughter.

* * *

The rest of the family had been more than okay letting Bella and Kiera stay the night. In fact, they'd been so happy, they'd even revealed the stack of clothing Alice had both bought and hand-made for the two girls for nights just like this. It both warmed Kiera's heart and terrified her to know the little pixie knew how to _make _clothes for her. She'd for sure never escape a fashion show now.

Rosalie stood next to her stiffly as she sifted through the chest of clothes for something to sleep in. Finding a matching set of lavender silk pajamas, Kiera took comfort in knowing she'd at least be comfortable and cute that night. Maybe she should ask Alice if she could take them home. She'd been in the middle of removing her shirt when she'd heard Rosalie inhale sharply. Stilling, Kiera hid with her arms in the air and the shirt over her head.

She'd forgotten. For the briefest of moments, she'd forgotten herself. What was Rosalie seeing right now? Her ribs making ugly indentations beneath her ashen skin, once so warm, so golden brown? Or was it the twisting claw marks that ran from chest to hip, a diagonal slashing of flesh? It'd been the last thing Seb had given her. Aside from the casual paranoia and rare nightmares, at least.

She dressed quickly, avoiding Rosalie's understanding gaze. She didn't want Rosalie to understand. Nobody should understand this kind of violence. Her scars had grown thin and white over the years, nearly invisible to the human eye. But it'll always be the first thing she sees when she looks in the mirror.

"He'll never touch you again." Rosalie promised, laying a gentle hand on her shoulder.

The incandescent rage in her golden eyes came from a woman who _knew_. Knew what it was like to be left laying on the ground somewhere, lost and bleeding out. Kiera swallowed the bile rising in her throat and clenched her eyes shut, ignoring the cold hand catching the tear that'd slipped through her lashes. One day Kiera would have the guts to ask Rosalie how she knew.

Right now she was only grateful that it was only Rosalie in the room. Bella hadn't seen the scars, her eyes too weak to track the marks. But the other Cullens would have noticed them in an instant. That many prying eyes seeing her deepest haunting trauma laid out like a map sent a shiver up her spine.

Rosalie said nothing, but her face said everything. She wouldn't be telling anyone. She'd take it to her fiery grave if that's what Kiera asked of her. Finally, Kiera sagged, letting herself drop into Rosalie's arms. Standing in silence, standing together- Kiera felt a piece of herself scab over. Therapy wasn't an option for supernatural creatures. Not in the way humans had it. But Kiera was glad she at least had this.

Rosalie had pleasantly surprised Kiera last night. Like her wall had lowered some, Rosalie was different than usual. Though never without her bladed tongue and barbed words they'd lacked their usual bite. It'd been refreshing. Rosalie wasn't some snake, she was just guarded with walls so high that many refused to try the climb. It could take years to open Rosalie up and be allowed to see inside her.

But something was telling Kiera Rosalie was worth the wait.

* * *

She closed her front door, a small smile on her face, only for it to fall off as she turned around. Ramona sat on the couch, her booted feet resting on the coffee table and a thick stack of letters in her hands. A cup of deceptively sweet-smelling tea sat on the table next to her feet. The closest to an alcoholic drink for Diwata was a cup of poisonous tea, and by the way Ramona was looking at her, she could tell Ramona has had several.

"Do you remember that awful summer, when you broke your mother's favorite teacup?" Ramona started and Kiera knew this wasn't going to be good.

"Vividly. Why?" She asked cautiously.

"She'd taken your hand and placed it onto the stovetop, all because you broke a cup. How you screamed and screamed." Ramona's hands tightened their grip. "That's when I knew I hated your mother."

"I don't remember much before waking up, but I still remember that." Kiera shifts in place. "Why mention all this now?"

"Because your mother is on her way to Forks."


	11. Barely Beating at All

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> TW: Rosalie and Kiera’s assault is talked about, though not in explicit detail. Still, it will begin with and end with an * if you wish to skip it! 

Ramona’s hand shook as she handed over the letter. It looked new, crisp. Beneath it was one yellowed by time, the edges crinkling beneath Kiera’s fingertips. It smelt of the attic, musty, and a sense of stuffiness that choked her. The first letter was merely a single line, explaining that Marisol would be coming by soon, no explicit date written down. It felt like a warning shot, an echo forming in Kiera’s ears as she let it drop to the floor. 

The second letter wasn’t a warning shot. It was a bullet straight to the heart. Her Tagalog reading comprehension has slowly faded from lack of use, but leave it to her mother to get straight to the point.

_ Daughter, _

_ If you had awoken whilst I still was at your side, I would have gladly shared this bit of knowledge. But as it were, I am halfway across the world, letting the warm tropical sun of our motherland sink into my skin. One day, you should visit. It’s truly an unparalleled experience. _

_ I regret to inform you that there may be some inconsistencies with your Metamorphosis. When I’d met your father, I knew he was no ordinary man. With beautiful fiery hair and the most enchanting brown eyes, he had taken my breath away. Even his pointed ears and catlike pupils did nothing to detract from his beauty. _

_ We’d only spent a week together, but he may very well be the love of my life. He was my mate- but I guess I wasn’t his. Don’t despair darling, you are something of a blessing, despite your many difficulties and faults. _

_ You see my dear...you are a hybrid. _

The rest of the world faded from view as Kiera’s eyes zeroed in on possibly the worst word ever. 

Hybrid. 

Something in between, not belonging fully to either realm. It was a slap in the face, spit at her feet. Her entire world feels unmoored, and Kiera goes sinks to the ground.

Ramona crouches next to her, resting her forehead in-between Kiera’s shoulder blades. “Your father is an Irishman. A Fae.” She said softly.

She was being gentle with the words because she knew the damage she’d done, the wound she’d laid into Kiera when she’d said Kiera wasn’t like a real Diwata, gaped in her chest now. It was a chasm of gore and teeth that groaned between her ribcage, demanding blood. She’d gone her entire life believing she was one thing, believing herself to be fully Diwata. Fully Filipino. All sense of belonging went straight out the window.

Little things start to make sense. Her name. Her height, taller than Ramona and taller than her mother. The differences in shades between them, from Kiera’s sepia tone to her mother’s rich oak skin. Her cousin, beautiful and brown like the earth, like the soil that they drew energy from. As a child, before she knew that beauty wasn’t a box, she’d thought her mother and cousin to be the most beautiful women in the world. She’d only wanted to be beautiful, too, to match them. 

Those thoughts had been her saving grace when she’d moved to the United States, submerged in a world of pale faces and light eyes. It’d kept her family roaming for decades, looking for a place to settle down that wouldn’t turn them away or make them feel unsafe. And while she’d loved the South for its blistering beauty, it’d been hell as a brown-skinned family of only women.

“There’s more.” Ramona urges, her cold breath chilling Kiera’s skin.

“How could there be more?” Kiera groans. “Is this not enough?”

“There is always more with your mother,” Ramona grumbles. She lets out a frustrated sigh when Kiera doesn’t answer her, barrelling into her version of being comforting.

“Listen to me. You are still my cousin, still my_ sister, _ even if your father is a ginger. What he is, does not take away from who you are. Now it may be confusing having both feet in a world each, but there is nothing wrong with you. You are still Filipino, still Diwata.” Ramona said sternly. 

“I’ve always wanted so badly to fit somewhere. Now where will I fit?” Kiera whispered, voice growing hoarse.

“Even if you turned out to be a ghoul, you’ll always fit with me.” 

The two sat there for as long as Ramona could stand. The rest of the letter said heavy on her tongue, Kiera could tell, but Kiera didn’t want any more terrible surprises. Life seemed to be storm after storm. When would they catch a break?

“What’s the other news?” Kiera was desperate for something good. Maybe even a clue about her father. “What does this even mean for me? Are there others like me?”

“....You are the first and likely last of your kind,” Ramona said softly. “Marisol thinks you might get your lightning abilities from your father. He’d been able to call upon storms. You just got the condensed version of his gift. Maybe that’s why it sits so closely on your skin and doesn’t appear in the sky.”

“What is it you’re not telling me?” Kiera whispered.

Ramona was silent for a moment, mulling over her words. “Your Death Day might be particularly difficult due to your mixed heritage, though we don’t know for sure.”

“Difficult how?” Kiera pressed.

“Difficult, as in, you might not wake up again.”

She soaked it in, turning the words over and over in her head. Frantically, she searched through the letters to see if there was any more mentioning about her Faerie father, or her Death Day. Nothing. Instead, her mother had written about the possible places she might be staying at, and a love story that didn’t last. 

“She knew I’d awaken.” Tears welled in her eyes and began to spill over. “She knew, and she’s still not here. She knew I might _ die _, and she’s only coming now.”

Ramona’s grip on her tightens, and Kiera falls apart in her cousin’s arms.

* * *

That night, Kiera dreams of lemon yellow eyes. 

_ She feels like a balloon cut from its string, floating and floating, until she’s finally gone. He howls with a force that rattles her bones and is gone before her eyes blessedly slide shut. _

Kiera wakes up with a start, what’s left of her heart beating like a wild drum in her chest. Sebastián had been perfect in the beginning, but they always are. An arranged marriage set up by her mother to boost the Villanueva’s family name, to give them a leg up in a time that didn’t accept them. Ramona had pointed out the cruel irony in Marisol setting up her Filipina daughter with an immigrant family from Spain, but Marisol had waved her off with a sneer.

He’d bring her flowers- not blue asters, which were her favorites- but pretty wine-colored roses. Kiera had thought it romantic, that they were simply a classic kind of flower. Sebastián had been so endearing in their first few months of courting that Kiera had written it off. After all, what girl didn’t enjoy roses?

Now the scent of them made her retch. Her room suddenly felt like an oven, and she kicked off her blankets, just barely making it to the bathroom in time. Thick clots of blood splatter the porcelain bowl like perfect petals and Kiera heaves once more. Ramona ghosts into the room, her hand holding back Kiera’s thick dark hair.

“Won’t be long now.” She murmurs. “Has Alice finished setting up the party?”

Kiera gives her a shaky nod, wiping at her mouth with the back of her hand. 

“Did you dream of it again?” Ramona asks, softer this time. “It always comes when you’re stressed.”

Kiera clenches her eyes shut. She could psychoanalyze herself all-day long, dig into why this dream had to be the one that pops up when times get tough. But she knows trauma just does what it wants sometimes. A boiling rage rushes through her, the unfairness of it all bringing on the familiar prickling of her fangs. The bowl shatters beneath her grip and Kiera dashes from the bathroom, pushing past Ramona who only pulls out her phone.

Ramona calls for a plumber without complaining once, silently moving about the house to deal with the mess herself. Kiera stalks back and forth on her dingy beige carpet, threatening to wear a path with her anger. Her new phone is in her hand a second later and she’s calling Rosalie’s number before she can even register it.

Rosalie immediately picks up. “Kiera?”

“Rose,” Kiera shudders a breath. “Pick me up?”

The sound of Rosalie’s BMW starting up brings a small smile to Kiera’s face. “Be there soon. Would you like me to stay on the line?”

“You may be invulnerable, but that car of yours is not. Driving while on the phone is never a good idea.” Kiera tugs anxiously at the ends of her hair, glancing towards her closet. With the way the Cullens drive, she should already be dressed and ready to go.

“The car is replaceable.” Rosalie says quietly. It’s the nicest thing she’s ever said to Kiera thus far, and Kiera’s heart swells in her chest.

“I’ll be fine. I should get dressed anyways.” She’s already pulling on the first things her hands touch when Rosalie gives her okay and hangs up.

Some days, it’s just the two of them. Curled up in Rosalie and Emmett’s room, a random movie on the screen from Rosalie’s vast collection, hushed laughter that only they partake in. Rosalie never pries on those days, only lets Kiera forget the world for a handful of hours. Apparently this has shocked Rosalie’s coven into silence. Kiera wouldn’t have known that this Rosalie wasn’t the normal Rosalie if it weren’t for the sheer disbelief mingling with the hope that crossed Esme and Emmett’s faces. 

They tended to look at Kiera with a hint of wonder and more than enough thanks. Maybe Rosalie had needed Kiera just as much as she needed her. Maybe she was reading into everything, hyper-aware of everyone’s smallest expressions. Rosalie was steadfast in her pursuit of Kiera’s time once the veil of indifference had been lifted. It was the kind of determination of one who’d spent years feeling desperately alone with a kind of pain nobody truly understood. Not unless you’d gone through it too. 

When the time came for swapping stories, Kiera dropped the book she’d been reading and listened. Rosalie spoke like she was speaking of the weather. Disinterested, detached. But the way her jaw would tighten on Royce’s name proved she wasn’t as far removed from her trauma as she pretended.

“I’d been in love with the idea of love,” Rosalie started, hands gentle as she painted Kiera’s fingernails a pale pink. It was from Rosalie’s personal collection, one not even Alice was privy to, and Kiera couldn’t help but feel special. 

“In love with my life.” She laughed, a hollow sound. “My life was perfect. I was beautiful, rich, young- I was adored wherever I went, given privileges others were not. I hardly had to pay for things, people tripped over themselves to pay for me. My parents were strictly middle class, and I was their favorite child, despite my two younger brothers.

I hadn’t known why for the longest time. All I’d known was that my father loved to buy me pretty dresses and that my mother spoke fondly of me to anyone who would listen. I can admit now I was spoiled. My entire life was exactly how I’d been taught to want it. My parents thought I should marry upwards, to give them even more wealth and a better social image. When Royce King came along, I’d thought I was getting my happy ending.” 

“But if any of us had gotten our happy ending, we’d be under gravestones.”Rosalie paused, examining her work. The corners of her mouth had tightened and if she could, Kiera thought Rosalie would be crying about now.

“Royce was the ideal match. Rich, handsome, charming. He was older than me, but that didn’t matter. What mattered was that he loved beautiful women, and I was the most beautiful in all of Rochester. So my mother sent me in my best dress to drop my father’s lunch off at his work, which also happened to be the bank Royce’s father owned.

Royce saw me and the courting started the next day. Roses, violets that matched my human eyes- they came to the door every day with handfuls of flowers. I couldn’t go anywhere without smelling like a bouquet.”

Kiera waited till her hands were dry before plucking a burgundy from the collection of nail polish, silently taking Rosalie’s hand in her own and nodding for her to continue. Rosalie gave Kiera’s hand a short squeeze and inhaled sharply.

“I’ve never envied anyone before. Not until my dearest friend Vera got married and had her little Henry. You remind me a lot of her, actually,” Rosalie smiled, eyes lost in thought. “She didn’t have much, but she had something I’d never known I’d wanted for myself. A husband to come home and kiss me, a beautiful baby with fat little cheeks. Did you want a baby before…?” 

“No, not particularly,” Kiera admitted. “It’s the choice that I miss the most.”

*“I knew you would understand,” Rosalie breathed. “A baby is what I want more than anything in this world. I thought I’d have that with Royce. But Royce was a monster of the worst kind. One night I’d been walking home from Vera’s when I came across him and a group of his friends. They’d been terribly drunk. I’d never seen him drunk, he hardly drank in front of me. That night, he reeked of alcohol. I’ll spare you the details, but they’d left me in an alleyway. Thought I’d die.

I’d been unseasonably cold that night, and I kept waiting to die. Carlisle had smelt the blood and found me, but it was too late. He’d bitten me, hoping I’d make a good match for Edward. Obviously we didn’t take to each other.” Rosalie chuckled. “After that night, I’d hunted each of them down. I’d even saved Royce for last, so he would know I was coming. I was a bit more theatrical back then.”

“Naturally,” Kiera teased, blowing gently at the red polish. 

“I’d stolen a wedding dress and killed the guards he’d hired to protect himself. Till this day I’ve never drunk from a human. I’d killed them, but I hadn’t wanted any part of them in me ever again. It wasn’t until I’d found Emmett that I’d felt any kind of happiness. But even then, it’s only half of what it should be.” Rosalie’s voice was brittle, sounding almost ashamed of her own admission.

“I’m glad they are dead,” Kiera confessed. “Otherwise I’d find them in their nursing homes and kill them myself. You can’t fault yourself for feeling like something is missing, Rose. Emmett can’t be all of your happiness.”

“Do you think you’ll ever fully be happy?” Rosalie’s golden eyes turned glossy.

“I don’t know. But I’d like to keep trying.” Kiera said.

“Had they been someone you knew?” Rosalie asked.

Kiera carefully screwed the cap back on, drawing her knees in close. Sebastián’s face through her mind and for the briefest of moments she thought she was going to be sick all over Rosalie’s plush cream carpet. 

“Yes.” She said quietly. “Like you, I’d been engaged young. But unlike you, he’d been a dear friend.”

Rosalie hissed through her teeth, closed her eyes briefly. When she’d opened them, they were pitch black with a deep rage. “He’d been your friend?”

“Yes. Is anyone in the house listening?” Kiera asked.

“Jasper and Emmett are out hunting. Carlisle is at work, Esme is in her garden, Alice is busy making your dress and she knows better than to listen in. Edward is with Bella at her house, but they should be coming soon.” Rosalie supplied, freshly painted hands clenching tight at her sides.

“Good. I’ll tell them when I want them to know,” Kiera sighed. “His name was Sebastián, and his family had come from Spain a few generations before we met. My mother had encouraged our friendship, been thrilled I had managed to ‘secure’ him. His family was rich, the kinds with old money. His father hadn’t been too pleased with me, thought I was too poor and too dark.”

Rosalie snarled but let Kiera continue, her red lips twisting into a fierce scowl. Kiera raised an arm and watched in amusement as Rosalie slipped under it and set it around her shoulders like a shawl. Pressed side by side like this, Kiera felt a sense of strength fill her. 

“But for some reason, he’d relented. Sebastián had been so kind, so soft-spoken before it all. He’d bring me to watch his card games. When he was feeling particularly generous, he’d give me a book or a dress. I hadn’t loved him, not for the longest time. But then he began accompanying me in my long walks into the forest. His love for nature is what made me start to fall for him.” 

The memory was bittersweet to look back on. Uneasiness and nostalgia warred in her stomach, and Kiera had to take a moment to simply breathe.

“He knew almost as many plants as I did. Every day, I saw more and more of someone that I could learn to love.”

“What changed?”

“The full moon came.” Kiera glanced at Rosalie, who had gone stiff. “He was a Lycanthrope. I know your kind have hated his for many centuries, and despite his status, his family knew how to hide their secrets better than anyone.”

“You survived a Child of the Moon?” Rosalie whispered hoarsely. 

“Somehow, yes. It was on one of those walks, a year into our relationship, that everything went to hell. He’d been agitated the entire week, angrier than I’d ever seen him. Paranoid, too. Most of the time in that forest is blurry. Like it’d been purged from my mind when I went to sleep. But I’ll never forget his claws tearing through my skin like scissors through a ribbon.”

“When I woke, Ramona had explained my dress had been around my thighs and that my arm had almost come clean off. It’d been hanging by a thread.”Kiera shivers, leaning into Rosalie’s hold. “His walking suit had been rumbled, and he’d been muttering to himself. I could feel his hands trying to put me back together.”

Both of them sat there, shaking together. Kiera was a live wire, raw and exposed, but she’d never felt more seen than she did at that moment. She’d keep it within her all these years in hopes she’d forget it, but it was bone-deep. She’d always remember.*

“Thank you for sharing,” Rosalie whispered.

“Thank _ you _. What are you thinking about?” 

“How Bella is so unprepared for this life. If I’d have a choice, I would never have chosen this for myself. I feel like she’s choosing wrong.” Rosalie frowned, her blonde head resting on top of Kieras.

“But it’s her choice, at the end of it all. You may not have wanted this life, but she isn’t as blind to the faults as you think she is, Rosie. You may not understand it, but shouldn’t she still get to choose?”

“I just don’t want her to make a mistake and regret it later on. She gets to have everything I never did. She gets to grow old, have a family. The chance to pass away in her sleep.” Rosalie said. “I envy her for it.”

“Then envy her for it. But shutting her out or spitting upon her name for making a choice you don’t agree with is a bit harsh, isn’t it? We may not have chosen our lot, but we can’t damn her for choosing hers.”

After that, sometimes the others join them. Rosalie must really be protective of her DVD collection because a deep growl escapes her when someone barges in. On days Rosalie felt gracious enough, Bella was allowed to sit on the other side of Kiera and watch with them. It’d taken nearly seven of those days for Rosalie to crack.

“You should wear the dark blue. It looks nice on you.” Rosalie said.

Bella dropped her the worn copy of Wuthering Heights, her eyes comically round. “Me?” She squeaked.

“No, the other human in the house,” Rosalie snapped. “Forget it.”

“No, you’re right. I think it looks nice too,” Bella rushed out. “Winter skin tones look best with blues right?”

“So you do listen when Alice speaks,” The corner of Rosalie’s mouth ticks up. “Deep blues and greens, yes.”

“What’s your season?” Bella asks lightly.

“When I was human, I was spring. Kiera is autumn, all warm and earthy tones.” 

“I don’t think I’ll ever understand that.” Bella mumbles. The girls turn to look at each other, stunned when Rosalie lets out a laugh.

She doesn’t know why, but Rosalie’s smile feels a lot like hope.

* * *

Kiera didn’t know when her mother would come to visit. She’d only said she’d be coming by, never specifying if it meant in time for her Death Day or ten years from now. Alice has been working day and night on the mock-up dresses she’s making Kiera wear at her debut, her ideas spinning more and more out of control. Jasper had claimed it was an anxious habit she had, never settling on a design when the world in front of her turned uncharismatically blurry. It touched Kiera that Alice cared so much about the most important day in her life, but her frustrations weren’t fun to be around lately.

Instead of haunting the Cullen house and being subjected to playing dress-up for a frazzled pixie, Kiera was standing at Emily’s stove. 90210 was playing in the background but neither woman paid it any mind. She wondered when the last time somebody cooked for Emily. Emily, who took care of everyone first and then herself last.

“Sam takes over a few times a week,” Emily answers when asked. “If he had his way, he’d let me sleep all day and be spoon-fed. But I like taking care of the pack. I’m an only child, I like having a big family.”

“So you’re probably going to have lots of little Uley's huh?” Kiera smiled to herself when Emily lit up.

“I hope so! God, can you imagine a little boy with his smile?” Emily gushed. “Or a little girl with his eyes? Oh, and when you and Paul have kids, our kids could be best friends. Wouldn’t that be great?”

Kiera pursed her lips. “Well, Em, about that...I can’t have kids. And I don’t think Paul and I are ever going to be like that.”

“Oh. I’m sorry for assuming, there isn’t any guidebook on imprinting. It’s all hearsay at this point.” She was silent for a few moments before she asked in a careful voice. “Did you want children?”

Kiera thought long and hard about how to answer. She didn’t want to offend Emily, or Paul, if this somehow got back to him. But all her memories of growing up with a mother like hers; they seemed to add up into a lack of maternal instincts. She knew she could love, having seen it with her cousin and Bella. Hell, even the Cullens are slowly worming their way into her heart. But she’d never yearned for a child. 

But now that it was taken away from her, the thought of having a child was a bitter one.

“No, not really. I’ve never really wanted one. What bugs me the most is that it’s not even an option anymore, if that makes any sense.”

“Ah. You are upset because of the lack of choice.” Emily stated. “I don’t blame you, our bodies are our own. When things are decided for us, it’s a slap to the face.”

“Right now my life is a constant state of waiting. I’m in limbo, you know? I never understood why Diwata call it Metamorphosis. It’s always felt more like purgatory to me. Everything is being decided for me right now. When I’ll die, when I’ll wake up, if I’ll wake up…” Kiera sighed.

“What do you mean if? Kiera, you’re going to wake up. “ Emily said sternly. “You’re too stubborn to die, look at what you’d already survived. You even run with Cold Ones and you’re still here!”

Kiera stared down at the pot of soup in front of her, biting her lips. “It’s not me just being paranoid, Em. I found out some pretty crazy news.”

“...You’re not full Diwata, are you?” Emily asked as if she already knew. 

The ladle dropped with a wet splat onto the tile floor as she spun around in shock. Emily looked the slightest bit guilty, but she didn’t dare look away. 

“How did you know?” Kiera whispered.

“Well, you have to understand. Imprints are very important to us- they are the one thing the pack can’t hurt. Hurting them would be like killing the wolf, and the pack bond is too strong to allow that to happen.”

“How. Do. You. Know?” Kiera grit her teeth, her hands clenching up at her sides. 

“The pack only recently included the trails near your house into their patrol. They don’t usually get close enough to hear anything, but one of our newest ones, Seth, moved in a bit too much. If one wolf hears it, the rest sees it once they shift. He heard your conversation with Ramona.” Emily cringed, the scars on her face puckering with the expression.

“That’s really creepy, Em. Like really creepy. You need to give me a heads up with things like that, don’t just do it and expect me to roll over with it. Have you not heard enough horror stories of my cousins' wrath? What if she’d found out? I know she’s only four eleven, but she’s closer to hell for a reason Emily.”

“It wasn’t my idea. And I’m not really allowed to share info about the pack, though if I could I would have told you!” Emily swore, her dark brown eyes welling with tears. 

“I don’t like being kept in the dark about things,” Kiera warned. “If it involves me or my cousin, please tell me next time.”

“I’ll make sure they know.” Emily promised. “I’m sorry Kiera. I really am.”

Kiera eyed her for a moment, wondering if she was remorseful enough. But Emily’s eyes were full of nothing but sincerity. Smoke pulled her away from her thoughts, the smell of burning food making her want to wretch. Spinning around, she realized she'd burnt the canned soup she’d been making for Emily. Emily, bless her soul, says nothing about Kiera’s lack of kitchen skills and silently moves the pot off the burner.

“I’ll order pizza,” Emily gives her a pat on the shoulder, holding back her laughter.

“That’s probably a good idea.” Kiera stated, grimacing at the mess she’s made. “It’s a good thing I won’t be needing food in the future.”

* * *

“Go over what a Death Day party is like once more.” Alice orders, twirling a pencil with her nimble fingers.

Kiera sighs. “Alice, we’ve been over this about fifty times.”

“It’s not been fifty times, stop being dramatic. Now, what happens?” Alice barked. 

She was taking this party planning way too seriously, but her need to overcorrect any possibilities of failure was keeping Kiera from snapping. Alice _ hated _ not being able to see Kiera. Kiera couldn’t even imagine something as complex and seeing the future, regardless that it was all dependent on choices. The endless possibilities Alice had to shift through even with her accelerated mind gave Kiera a sympathy headache.

“It’s kind of like a debut or a debutante’s entrance into society. We gather we feast, we dance the waltz. Sometimes the chosen Diwata’s family and friends give toasts or have solo dances. Ramona and her father did a special father-daughter dance. It was his way of showing he was letting her go, letting her grow up.”

“It’s almost like a wedding,” Alice said, eyes sparkling.

“Or a quinceanera.” Esme beamed from the doorway, her hands carrying a tray full of snacks for Kiera. “My quince was wonderful, and I remember how hard I cried during my father-daughter dance.”

“The Spanish did take over the Philippines for a while. There is a lot of overlap.” Kiera happily took the tray of snacks, hoping one of them would stay down.

“Who are you inviting?” Esme asked, sitting at the edge of the bed. Her caramel hair shone sweetly in the afternoon sunlight, not a single strand out of place as per usual. The bruises beneath her eyes were always softer than the others, the edges worn by the kind look in her golden gaze.

“You guys and Ramona, of course. And likely the pack.” Kiera hadn’t wanted to share that tidbit, due to the weird atmosphere that followed after talking about either.

Alice and Esme glanced at each other, but Esme only nodded. “I’ll make sure the family keeps in check. May I suggest a meeting or two with the pack beforehand to get more comfortable with each other’s presence?”

Something breaks from the other room, two separate voices groaning and grumbling. Kiera rolled her eyes, already knowing Rosalie was one of the voices. She complained often and loudly about the strange scent the wolves carried, but she’d learned to keep most of her comments to herself. The other person was a mystery, though it seemed both Alice and Esme knew who it was by the small amused smiles on their faces.

“I also think if we initiate contact with your father’s side of the family soon enough, they can come to your party.” Alice said quietly, playing with the rings on her fingers.

“I don’t want anything to do with them.” Kiera hissed. “He didn’t want anything to do with me, and so I want nothing to do with him.”

“But-” Alice was hushed by Esme, whose teeth momentarily gleamed like a warning sign.

“None of your human friends then?” Esme continues on as if Alice hadn’t spoken, smiling beautifully again.

“There will be too many supernatural creatures for me to feel comfortable inviting team humanity. Plus, I die at the end of the party. That’s kind of a bummer already, no need to scar the humans further.”

“You what?” Alice’s mouth drops open, as if she didn’t already know. Kiera smirks at her and closes it for her, narrowly missing the playful nip Alice gives her by a hair.

“It’s called a Death Day for a reason,” Kiera teases. “I’ll drink a cup of poisonous tea and take a nap. And then I’ll wake up, fully changed.”

“Are you scared about it, dear?” Esme asks, a concern so loving that it throws Kiera through a momentary loop.

“Not really.” She may have told them about her duality, but she wasn’t going to tell them she might not wake up. That would be a can of worms for another day. 

Hopefully, _ after _ she wakes up.

If she wakes up.

Anyways. Back and forth Alice went, showing seating charts she’s already made and simply nodding when Kiera told her to _ please not sit Rosalie next to Paul. _ She wanted her two friends to enjoy each other, but Paul’s temper and Rosalie’s incessant need to have the last word would make the party end in tears. Probably Paul’s tears, the poor dude has been frustrated enough lately. 

“Sit Rosalie with Jacob. They both like cars, they can talk about that.” Esme informed helpfully. 

“Rosalie doesn’t like anybody but like two people,” Kiera said bluntly. “I doubt she’ll want to talk about cars with someone she’s been forced to sit next to.”

“Rosalie can speak for herself.” Rosalie interjected, strutting into the room. 

“And what does Rosalie say to sitting next to Jacob?” Esme’s brow quirked, smiling at her daughter. 

“Rosalie says ‘no’.” Rosalie says with a scoff, crossing her arms.

“Stick Rosalie next to Leah, they’ll get along great,” Bella said from the doorway, Edward smirking behind her, his hand on the small of her back.

“Bella- actually? That’s a great idea. You’ll actually like each other. “ Kiera said. “You both can talk crap about Jacob and Edward. It’ll be fine.”

Rosalie considered it for a moment, her darkened eyes lightening. “I can work with that.”

* * *

Kiera is utilizing the last few hours of daylight, her camera held up to her eye. Golden hours makes things look much more luxurious than they really are, but she doesn’t mind the illusion. With fresh air in her lungs and her camera in her hands, Kiera almost felt at peace. Something about the woods near the Cullen house didn’t look so scary. In fact, they looked safer than they have in a long time.

Kiera shakes herself of her thoughts, still not wanting to traverse the woods. It hurt to ignore its call, but deep down she knew she'd return someday. Bella’s behemoth of a truck was the first thing she captured, it’s rusty exterior having grown on Kiera. She still thought it was an ugly thing, but it was somehow comforting. 

Esme’s slowly growing flower garden was next. With Ramona’s tips, her flowers had begun to flourish. Ramona had begrudgingly given over some of her secrets, but even she soon became endeared to the sweet Esme. A dragonfly lands on one of the sprouting lilies, it’s iridescent wings beating happily. Kiera greedily soaks in the image, her finger rapidly clicking.

When she turns around, Jasper is on the porch, leaning against a pillar with his arms crossed. His eyes are a darkened caramel as he watches her, his lips quirked in a small smile. Kiera grins at him and snaps a quick picture.

“Going to pose for me now, Jasper?” Kiera teases, enjoying the way the camera catches the way Jasper laughs.”What are you, a GQ model? There goes my self-esteem, right out the window.”

He sobers, his eyes still twinkling. “If I’m a GQ model, aren’t you meant to be on the cover of Vogue?”

“Ah, he jests.” Kiera shakes her head. “I’m a literal foot compared to you Cullens. But no worries, I’ll have my glow up and it’ll be over for you beautiful jerks.”

“Whitlock. You’re not a foot,” Jasper corrects before he gives her an incredulous look. “How could you think that?”

“I’m dying, Jasper. Nobody looks hot while they are dying. Not unless you’re Dean Winchester.” Kiera chuckles. “Whitlock is a nice last name. I hadn’t thought vampires kept their last names when joining a coven?”

“Usually, they don’t. On most records, I’m a Hale. I’m Rosalie’s twin a lot of the time. Sometimes I’m a Cullen, but usually, I play a Hale.”

“So when do you get to use your real last name then?” Kiera asks, tilting her head.

“Almost never, if I’m honest.” He says with a wry smirk.

“That’s a shame. Maybe one day you’ll get to use it again.” Kiera smiles. 

Looking at the photos she’s taken, she’s thrown for a loop when Jasper’s comes out blurry. Everything around him is perfectly crystalline, sharpened against his blurred form. He looks like he was caught mid-movement but Kiera is sure he had stayed perfectly still.

“Ah. Didn’t want to ruin it for you, but even cameras don’t work on us.” Jasper sounds wistful, coming to stand next to her, looking over her shoulder at the pictures.

“Painted portraits only, huh?” Kiera thinks back on the gigantic oil painting hanging in Carlisle’s office. The Volturi had seemed so regal, so stiff. Even Carlisle had been cast in a noble light. Out of all the art mediums, Kiera preferred photography. It's always seemed more natural to her, including more movement than a stationary painting could. But now the Cullens couldn’t even have that. It was a pity.

“What about IDs and passports? Doesn’t that make things extremely difficult to go overseas?” Kiera asked.

“Typically, we use Esme’s private jet service. While it’s not the most inconspicuous way of transportation, sitting in a plane with a bunch of humans for too long is dangerous. At least it is for me,” Jasper admits, smiling stiffly. “Carlisle is the one who uses normal planes the most, with Rosalie coming in second. Esme and I have the most trouble.”

“Esme owns a private jet service? Why didn’t Alice use that when we went to get Edward?” Kiera can’t help her wide-eyed look. “Oh, you guys are rich rich.”

“Technically we can handle the flight, but I’d rather not test it. It’s hard enough to be in a college classroom for two hours, let alone on a plane for fourteen. Esme has a small service for those like us that try to blend in. Our pictures are actually extremely detailed portraits.” Jasper chuckles. “Esme loves when we have to change photos out for new ones. It gives her an excuse to paint the family.”

“That’s insane. I bet she makes so much money that way.” 

“Oh, no. Esme never charges unless she doesn’t like the person. And there are very few people Esme doesn’t like.” Jasper smirks.

“Who is bad enough for Esme of all people to not like? They must be terrible.” Kiera laughs.

“Usually people of the Volturi. Of course, she claims she’s busy or overbooked when they ask, but we all know that’s a lie. She could complete their portraits in a week if she really wanted. And only because she’d have to wait for the paints to dry.”

“Damn. I respect that.” Kiera admitted, leaning her shoulder against Jaspers' arm. 

She wasn’t wearing his jacket today, having left it at home to finish drying. Today she was wearing a simple creamy turtleneck and a heavy coffee-colored cardigan, both the courtesy of Rosalie who’d demanded Kiera buy more warm things due to her dropping temperature. Even though it was the middle of spring, Forks rained more days than not. There are only about one hundred days of sun, and today was one of them.

Jasper wore a thin grey henley, the curves of his shoulders filling it out easily. It covered most of his skin, but the peaks of it had that preternatural glow to it that Alice’s had. She sometimes forgot vampires had this halo effect, but looking at Jasper now, she wondered how she could ever forget it.

“What?” Jasper’s lip quirked. “What’s got you so smiley?”

“You’re kind of angelic-looking,” Kiera said simply, as if it were a fact. “I had already known you guys were stupidly beautiful, but every reminder makes me question if you guys aren’t actually angels or something.”

“That’s part of the charm,” They’d begun walking now, skirting the edges of the driveway. “The glow tends to mesmerize humans and bring them in. Like an angler fish. Not very angelic.”

“Ah, but you’re thinking of the wrong kind of angels. Biblically, angels are terrifying. Wheels, multiple faces, skyscraper heights- why do you think they say ‘do not be afraid?” Kiera snaps a picture of a flock of geese flying overhead, mentally praying they don’t poop.

“I didn’t peg you as the religious type,” Jasper said dryly.

“I’m not, not anymore.” Kiera shrugs. “My family is Catholic, though you don’t see much of it these days.”

“What made you stop believing?” Jasper asked quietly, the two of them slowing to a stop. “If you don’t mind me asking.”

Kiera pretends to adjust the settings on her camera, her dark eyes glazing over. “When I was laying on the forest floor, begging God to either save me or kill me as I bled out.”

Jasper flinched. In the moment, he’d looked like a statue you’d see in a museum. Cold, stiff, and brutally beautiful. His eyes were the color of tar and a hint of fang showed beneath his lips. Still, he did not press. He only waited, eyes darting across her face in search of meaning.

“One day, I’ll tell you. But not today, “ Kiera smiled weakly. “Just know that I loved someone once, and I’ll bear the weight of that for the rest of my life.”

Kiera paused, wondering if she could show him. If he’d understood her meaning if he thought she was gross now. But she continued on, braved by Rosalie’s company these past few weeks. Carefully, Kiera gripped the collar of her turtleneck and pulled down. The beginning of her scars peeked through, and Kiera could swear his eyes became impossibly darker.

“You’re not the only one with scars, Jasper. Maybe that’s why I’ve never been afraid of yours like I know most creatures would be.” Kiera said softly. “We both survived. We are both still here. I think you are tough as hell for making it through whatever you went through. Maybe one day, we can swap stories.”

Jasper brought a hand to her face, using the back of it to brush back a strand of dark hair. A burst of immense affection threatened to upend her, swirling through her till her toes curled. Kiera blinks against the current. This is the first time she’s fully noticed how gorgeous Jasper is. She’s known it, just commented on it, but it’s like seeing the world light up with color living in grey.

He drops his hand and Kiera struggles to gather herself. Confusion rushes through her, followed softly by overwhelming terror. It takes her a moment to shake it off. Kiera takes in a deep breath and steps back, giving him a wide smile that feels entirely too fake. Two and two nearly come together, but Kiera doesn’t want to make five, so she shoves the moment into the back of her head.

Jasper for his part doesn’t look too bothered. “Apologies. I’m simply glad to know you aren’t afraid of the way I look. So many people are, even my coven forgets from time to time that I’m more than my body.”

“It’s alright,” Kiera keeps her voice light. She feels guilty for thinking he meant it any other way but mostly embarrassed. “It was just unexpected. Sometimes I forget you have your ability.”

“I never forget,” Jasper says softly. “It makes it easy to forget with you, and sometimes I almost let myself. I can pretend things are different for myself. I don’t mean to overwhelm you. You’re just the only piece of dry land in sight when it feels like I’m drowning.”

“Being an introvert with a power like yours sounds like absolute hell,” Kiera wrinkled her nose. “You don’t need to be sorry. We’re friends, Jasper. At least I think so?”

Jasper pauses, something flashing in his eyes Kiera doesn’t have time to catch. Then he smiles, wide and crooked, looking the most beautiful she’s ever seen him. “I’d like that. To be your friend.”

* * *

The hot water isn’t so hot anymore. It’s not an act of comfort to linger beneath the shower’s spray now that her body is stuttering through its Metamorphosis. She wipes the steam from the mirror and looks at herself, wondering if she’d always look like a microwaved corpse.

Logically, she knows she won’t. Ramona didn’t. But she also can’t account for the Faerie side of her. What if they look like the Cullens, like beautiful bodies frozen in death? For once, she understands why they’d hate themselves. Being leeched of the life that fills you and leaving you looking like both the star and the monster in a horror movie must damage anyone's sense of self.

Kiera tries to smile at her reflection, looking at her blunt teeth. The mirror has fogged over, reminding her of when she saw Jasper’s reflection. Blurred like a freshly painted picture that’d suffered a dry brush running through it. She thinks she’s almost made her fangs drop when a muffled bang sounded from her room. The pressure that’d welled up in her gums dissipates and Kiera rolls her eyes.

“Ramona! You better not be stealing my sweat again, you thief!” She shouts.

Ramona doesn’t answer her.

With a huff, Kiera gathers the towel around her and steps out into the dark hallway. Steam billows behind her, the edges of her wavy hair frizzing from the heat. “Mona?” She calls again, annoyance lacing her tone.

Nothing.

Dread builds in her stomach. She just remembered Ramona had gone to her small office in Port Angeles to finish up a legal matter. Kiera was supposed to be home alone.

She tries to inhale, but all she gets is steam and the scent of her shampoo. It’s a natural one Rosalie had made for her, something lighter than the nose-blinding chemical-filled bottles from the store. It does little to help her.

Kiera edges closer to her room but thinks better of it. She’s already done this once, and she’d always prided herself on being smarter than the morons unfortunate enough to be living in a horror movie. Kiera turns on her feet, bumping into a slim chest. Pale hands grip her shoulders and a sickeningly familiar voice chuckles.

“Missed me?” Sebastiàn says. His eyes are a putrid yellow, so unlike the warm golden tones of the Cullens. When he smiles, his mouth is full of teeth.

Kiera screams.

  
  


AN: Fun fact, I hate roses. I think they are pretty but boring, super cliche. They smell lovely though and rose flavored things are always yummy! Also, Kiera’s experience is like my own, with some tweaks. 

I hope you aren’t disappointed by my choice in her other half. It’s been planned from the beginning, and my take on Fae is going to be really…dark at times. I tried to show hints throughout it, and even directly compared the Diwata to the Fae in one of the first few chapters ;) Has Kiera finally gone crazy?? Poor lass.

P.s. Her name is Irish, and it means ‘dark’ or ‘dark hair’. It’s like KEE-RA, I believe. The chapter title comes from the song 'Hello My Old Heart' by The Oh Hellos. Link to the playlist is here: [Lighting Never Strikes Twice](https://open.spotify.com/playlist/3gkwukLfDR7ZST7YF2ZkRa?si=LjcWO877Tn6HXMhcglFPpQ)


End file.
